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We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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I misunderstood her restraining order for “playing hard to get”...0
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She had no sense of humor.0
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Nope, can't leave ones Dear Heart0
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She found someone else. 😲1
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He found better legs, head, body0
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She wanted me to give her an arm and a leg for her “collection,” but I couldn’t bear to part with them.0
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Polar opposites. She has a halo while I got horns.0
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Everytime we went to church and had holy water sprinkled he cried out in agony1
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She kept forgetting about my water phobia0
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He refused to bathe and here’s where I can tell you love does NOT conquer all. 🤢1
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She refused to lower her standards to accommodate my deficiencies...0
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I always thought when he answered "Def" he meant Definitely, not Deficient. 🥴0
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Her last words were “You are perfect ex-boyfriend material” and then I never saw her again...0
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He mentioned something about Silencing Lambs and then something about not wanting to be made into lampshades and ... IDK🤷0
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She went on to be a famous makeup model1
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He got fit and kept running0
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Although I was fluent in both English and Spanish, I failed to meet her emoji standards...0
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He kept sending me emojis like these
🤬🤕🤡👹💥👃🦴🐮🐮🐽🦧🦍🦏🦀🐛🐖🤢🤮💨🐍🐄🦛🦨🦀💡🧪⛏️✂️⚰️☣️☢️✖️🚻🔚🔜0 -
She was texting animal emojis to some muscular dude. I think it was about all the positions they were going to try! 😮1
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I didnt type the right animal emojis!! COME BAAAAACK!! 🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈1
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She kept tally of my lives on her phone. Looked like one more and I was a goner so I made myself disappear!! 😱2
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Although we agreed to get married, she preferred it be with someone else...0
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He was a Cat Person and didn't like my Doggies0
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She said I liked her dogs more than her and threw me out 😒 I miss those dogs 😭0
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She kept bringing her ex's dogs too much in conversations, she couldn't move on ...0
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She kept moving on down the couch every time I tried to snuggle0
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The couch kept breaking every time I sat on it...she got fed up and scooted off0
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She kept putting her smooth peanut butter in front of my crunchy in the cabinet. There are some things that should never be done.
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His first love was peanut butter, I couldn't compete0
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She didn't like Nutella....0
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