Want to work out, too self conscious to?

sweatthief
sweatthief Posts: 6
in Motivation and Support
Going to the gym makes me scared people are wondering what in the world I'm doing there, and if they're looking at my fat. It gets to where istart nervous-eating in prep for gym time. So, to fix it, I started trying to do an at home regime, but even the I have to cover myself in clothes just to be comfortable by myself, to the point where I can hardly work out due to said clothes being restrictive. I know the more I work out the more confidence will build, but it's hard getting past this anxiety I'm feeling right now. Does anyone have advice to try and combat these feelings? Thank you!

Edit;; also, sorry if I posted this into the incorrect topic, still trying to get the hang of this place, haha.

Replies

  • Moviegal77
    Moviegal77 Posts: 65 Member
    I go to the gym and I'm no small gal. At my gym there is all kinds of people from small to large and all fitness levels. I felt the same way you did and it took me a few visits before I realized nobody cared what I looked like or did.
    Trust me go a couple of times and that will build your confidence up.
    Good luck.
  • Cyclingbonnie
    Cyclingbonnie Posts: 413 Member
    Go! It gets easier. However, until you are able to go, ditch the excess clothes and workout in private. After you are a little stronger, and have begun to loose weight, your confidence will grow and you will be able to go to the gym, but what ever you choose ... don't quit exercising and be sure to log everything. Good luck.
  • yenilopez1985
    yenilopez1985 Posts: 52 Member
    i had/ have the same issue with the gym so i stopped going... am trying to workout at home and go for walks but even going for walks kind of scares me i always feel like people stare at me ohh and jogging i dont ever dare to do it in front of people specially if they are behind me.. i got a big butt so is kind of embarrazing!
  • PandorasMom
    PandorasMom Posts: 6
    Honestly, I really believe most normal people at the gym have this insecurity as well. Therefore we are too busy worrying what we look like to others to even notice the other people! Which ultimately results in no one noticing us, either!! I am unsure how I got over this. I was even worried about sweating at the gym. Now I wear it as a badge of honor. I do know some people see what we look like, and are kind enough to provide positive feedback when we are making positive changes to our body. They are usually the muscle heads, in my gym, and they are great cheerleaders for us newcomers to fitness.
  • FarAway02
    FarAway02 Posts: 211
    I suffer from an anxiety disorder.... this means that every insecurity and anxious feeling most people have in life is times a hundred for me. Going to the gym would equal fitting on the floor with a panic attack for me right now.

    So I solved the problem by buying myself an exercise mat and working out at home! I also bought myself a little elliptical for about £30. It's not the sturdiest thing going but I can work up a sweat on it so it's all good!

    When I started feeling brave enough I took up running again out and about. But I still go in remote places early in the morning so that I don't bump in to anyone!!

    You have two options:

    1) Be brave, smile & go for it
    2) Work out at home
  • runningjen74
    runningjen74 Posts: 312 Member
    Really, if I see someone at the gym that's larger, all I'm thinking is fair play. I figure anyone looking at me is thinking exactly the same thing. If I see anyone working out at any size and clearly putting in the effort I think fair play.

    Yes, I hated going in for the first 2 months or so, but went in religiously 4 times a week. Got to know peoples faces they got to know mine. It's self confidence, you need to give yourself a talking to each time you go in that you can do and just go in!
  • gigglybeth
    gigglybeth Posts: 365 Member
    I wish I could find it, but there was a thread last week or the week before about how people viewed others at the gym. Specially, overweight people. Every single person said if they noticed an overweight person working out that they sent them positive vibes and were inspired by someone working so hard to get control of their health.

    I was scared to workout at the gym, too, but like others said, everyone is so preoccupied with their own workout to really pay attention to what anyone else is doing. Unless someone is acting extremely odd (like the lady who was loudly running on the treadmill in flip flops), I never really pay attention to anyone else.
  • GypsySoul_74
    GypsySoul_74 Posts: 152 Member
    how about this: i have NEVER seen anyone, no matter how overweight or out of shape, at the gym and wondered why they were there or thought anything negative about them at all. my first thought when i see someone overweight at the gym is to mentally high-five them for taking the initiative to get out there and do something good for themselves.

    i know it is hard and scary--sometimes even small people like me have self-consciousness issues and feel like everyone is watching and they think we're getting it wrong. but truly, as someone else mentioned earlier, 99% of people at the gym are so focused on their own workout that they're not worrying about yours.

    when i've gone through a rough patch and felt uncomfortable with myself, i've just reminded myself that i have to get out there and do the work in order to gain a body i can be confident about. i'm not going to feel any better about myself if i don't do it--the only way my body (and thus, my confidence in how i look) improves is if i take the body i currently have to the gym and work on exchanging it for the body i want :)

    i like others' suggestions to walk or work out at home, as well. that takes some of the social pressure off of you. i know you mentioned being uncomfortable enough with yourself that your workout clothing ends up being restrictive even in private--that's the kind of thing i would chew my therapist's ear off about. therapy has helped me learn skills to help me stop allowing my self-perception to limit me (among many, many other skills related to nutrition, fitness and self-image--many of which i still need LOTS of practice with!). maybe at some point you would want to give a therapy session a shot--it's not everybody's thing, but it sure helps me get out of my own head and out of my own way :)

    i hope that you will remember you are a strong and beautiful person in this moment and always. wishing you luck!!
  • delfonzo2000
    delfonzo2000 Posts: 38 Member

    Unless someone is acting extremely odd (like the lady who was loudly running on the treadmill in flip flops), I never really pay attention to anyone else.

    Great mental image!
  • yenilopez1985
    yenilopez1985 Posts: 52 Member

    But I still go in remote places early in the morning so that I don't bump in to anyone!!

    i do that too!!
  • Lauren344
    Lauren344 Posts: 50 Member
    I felt the same when I first joined the gym 4 weeks ago and now I just think the reason I'm here is to loose weight and get fit!
    I'm doing something about it.
    Why should I feel so insecure.
    And just remember EVERYONE has self confidence issues no matter how big or small and if they are slim or fat that person is, nobody is perfect

    Good luck with your weight loss :)
  • wrentrotter
    wrentrotter Posts: 36
    I felt like this to start too, especially as the exercise I wanted to start doing was swimming. The thought of people staring at me in a swimsuit terrified me. I started off at women only sessions at my local pool, and honestly there were people of all shapes and sizes, some bigger, some smaller, and nobody could give a hoot. The good thing about swimming is once you are in the pool, nobody can really see you anyway! Starting is the hard part, it's all downhill from there, you will feel great once you've done it!

    I've felt pretty scared with each different exercise I have done since, but every single time I have found the fear of doing it really is worse than the actual doing.
  • mshopey
    mshopey Posts: 125 Member
    I've been jogging several times on the street.
    And i get shouts of "LOOK AT THAT FAT B*TCH RUN!"
    And it really hurts, but i see it like this, they've probably never worked out in their lives, cause if they did, it wouldn't be amusing.
    Whereas the gym situation comes, at the end of the day, people are probably super focused on what they're doing, and probably haven't even noticed you at all.
    Focus on your effort and soon enough there won't be any room for worrying.
  • siany01
    siany01 Posts: 319 Member
    I was even worried about sweating at the gym. Now I wear it as a badge of honor.

    THIS ^^ That was so me when I first started going and now I am all' yeah i'm sweaty and I have worked my butt off for it'

    I do think a few people look at me, bright red tomato face and sweating like anything, a couple I think might be eww look at the state of her. Others might be wondering if they should call me an ambulance lol (joking....I think) BUT I get more looks of fair play, you are giving it everything there.

    People I have noticed are, ermmmm Oh there is one lady who is slightly larger and she kicks some *kitten* on the elliptical. She is bigger than me and she would woop my butt going head to head. A couple of runners that are there when I go at 6am, oh and the fit dude who does weights :blushing: Everyone else is just background noise.

    Go to the gym. As I did, and quite a few others, suck it up the first few times until you get comfy. You'll be grand :happy:
  • sweatthief
    sweatthief Posts: 6
    Wow, thanks for all the replies everyone. It's nice to know that other people worry about it too, I guess I'll have to just try and force myself til it starts feeling more natural :)

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