Breaking up is hard to do

LeahT84

The last guy I dated broke up with me a couple months ago, in a text message. It took a while to figure out why he was ending it, but found out that he didn't like that I was losing weight and becoming more confident in myself. He started seeing a girl much bigger than me within a week of us breaking up. He likes his women weak and self conscious because it makes him feel better about himself.....

Point is, I laughed because it was so ridiculous! It hurt at first, and now I realize that anyone who doesn't want to be fully committed to you isn't worth your damn time or effort. This guy that did that to you is a total D - BAG. He is not worth your time. Put 110% percent of your sadness/anger/frustration into your workouts, push through the pain, and you will see that you are way to good for him. He'd rather be with some lazy chick who spends all day playing video games instead of someone who wants to get out and enjoy the life around them, then let him be lazy and miserable with someone else, and you embrace singlehood and learn to love yourself so that some day, some wonderful man will walk into your life and sweep you off your feet and never make you feel anything less than the beautiful person you are!!!

joseejolie

Boom!!!!!!!! I recently broke up with a guy who was a complete *kitten*. On to the next, let the good times roll! Anyone who chooses some videogame playing geek over a hottie like you needs his head examined anyway. Keep loving yourself and focusing on gettting back in touch with your likes, hobbies, friends and most importantly your-self! This is an exciting time, ask yourself- What kind of world do you want? Then create it for yourself.

Jennisin1

Please... my ex left me for someone cuter (his words) when I was still nursing our baby (and had a 2 year old)... I used that as fuel to be the best me I could. Its mostly for me but dang, does it feel good since I am soooo way much hotter than his mistress. She knows it and makes his life difficult, and I just smile and keep on being happy.

jlfoster0427

Breakups always motivated me to be the best me possible. If im the best I can be then it was definitely their loss. Use those feelings to motivate you to work harder to really make them regret breaking up with you May be a bit shallow but you have to channel that horrible feelings into something better

yo_andi

Living well truly is the best revenge.

Get on it.

sunglasses_and_ocean_waves

Please... my ex left me for someone cuter (his words) when I was still nursing our baby (and had a 2 year old)... I used that as fuel to be the best me I could. Its mostly for me but dang, does it feel good since I am soooo way much hotter than his mistress. She knows it and makes his life difficult, and I just smile and keep on being happy.

Ouch! What a d*ck.

To the OP: I know it;s an old expression, but time really does heal all wounds. If you really think about it, I bet this guy was a jerk all along. Don't let it derail you, cause he's not worth it.

PlayerHatinDogooder

Breaking up is easy.

That's why there's texting and emails.

bostonwolf

Thanks guys. My boyfriend of 10 years met someone through the Playstation network and they are "in love". There's more to it than that, but I was totally blindsided. I missed my run yesterday...but have gotten some activity in, i.e. piling his crap up and chucking at glass candle at him.

His loss. You eat right and run for you, not for him. Focus on that and keep up the exercise. Staying busy will help your work through it all.

Send him on his way and tell him not to ever come back looking to get back together. You are better off without someone that selfish and shallow.

KANGOOJUMPS

awww, I am sorry, but all the more reason to get tough and strong and kick some butt.
WILLPOWER! YOU GO!

My0WNinspiration

Thanks guys. My boyfriend of 10 years met someone through the Playstation network and they are "in love". There's more to it than that, but I was totally blindsided. I missed my run yesterday...but have gotten some activity in, i.e. piling his crap up and chucking at glass candle at him.

Excellent anaerobic work, keep it up ;-)

Jerk. It's for the better. Playstation network? As in, he had enough of some kind of life on there to do whatever? In about 18 months, that is going to be hilarious to you. Take care.

As unfeeling and cold as that may sound, I cannot stress enough how true it is. I recently found an old journal of mine, chronicling the very bad breakup of my most recent serious ex. The pages were spattered with tear marks, and filled with so much angst, it was pathetic. Now, that journal is hysterical. All I can do is laugh at the silly girl who wrote those words and cried over a useless man-child that I never even think about anymore.

The long and short of it is: it will suck for a while. Suck hard. But if you can keep reminding yourself that you won't always be sad, and that it will get better, it won't be so hard. After a while you'll forget to be sad, and a little after that, you won't even care. And pretty soon after THAT, you'll wake up one morning and realize you haven't even thought of the douche in several days, a week, a month. And you'll be genuinely happy to be well shot of him.

Pretty much this

rml_16

Not recently, but I've been through some tough breakups. I lose my appetite completely, though, so I don't know what help I can be.

ash8184

I know this is easy for me to say since I'm not in your shoes, but can you take the negative energy from the breakup and let it fuel your healthy lifestyle and workouts? After my last (terrible) breakup, I found myself in the gym working off the frustration I had and was at my lowest weight/in the best shape I've been in, in a very long time. Hang in there.

PS: the better you feel/hotter you are, the more he'll be totally pissed he lost you ;-)

kirstyfairhead

I say 'keep throwing stuff'!! but seriously...use the pain, bleed your heart out on the treadmill, suck it up in the gym. You are beautiful and will only get more so.... he is an *kitten* and always will be. Don't let him take any more from you than he already has.

Be strong hon and keep at it, the man who deserves you is closer than you think!!

Wag1one

My husband died from a serious health complication. He was in his late twenties. I spent a year mourning this huge loss which almost killed me. I got stronger and decided to move on. I was at a point where I wanted to be loved, cared for and wanted again. I met this great guy who was 14 years older than me. We connected instantly. All I asked him was to be kind to me. I fell horribly in love. More than the death of my husband, this guy broke me to such an extent and made me reach low after low, that at some points of my life, I seriously considered suicide and came very close to it.


I was madly in love with him. For just a few moments of seeing him, I would do anything. One night he stressed me out completely and I had a few drinks at home. I was breaking up with him, told him to never contact me again etc etc. He pressured me to meet him. I got behind the wheels and drove in a drunken state to meet him. I got to him and he got me more drunk; I had lost all rational sense by then, let me drive back home, on the way he texted me, I picked up my phone to text him back and boom I crashed into a parked car. No one was hurt I thank god everyday for that, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. I lost my license, walked away from a highly paid job as I couldn’t take the shame of what I had done. He dumped me a week later. I spent three months on bed, crying, sleeping and drinking. I texted and called him constantly to come back to me. I begged as I had never begged before. I still sometimes think of that girl and want to slap her. More than pity, I feel angry at her. And he did. He came back because he needed money. I gave him all my savings. He left me again.

So. This is what I did. I woke up one day. I was done with my self pity and crying.
I remembered who I was. I am a girl who lost her husband and watched him die a horrible death. I am a girl who worked several jobs to go through college and universities to have an education. I am a girl who never gave up in life. In time, I got my license back, saved all the money I wasted on him, got the best job of my career, got fitter and stronger than ever.


This is almost three years ago. And yea, during these three years, he came back to me several times.
And I let him. I allowed it to happen. Only this time, I was the one in control. Each time he came back into my life, I wanted him to see how far I had gotten in my life. And each time he saw how happy and beautiful I am, I dumped him. I walked away from him. I walked away proud. As the years passed by, he got fatter and uglier and I thank god I didn’t end up with him. In the end, all of us have an inner strength with we just have to find and hold on to it. I understand what you are going through. Mourn it, cry over it, heal yourself but after all has been said and done – take control of your life. Because only you can do that. Everything will be fine, I give you my word. Give it time. Time makes everything better and I am a living testimony of that. Take good care.

SidsMom80

Channel your emotions into your work outs. By giving up on yourself you're letting him hurt you more. Don't give him that kind of power. Just think of it as losing a quick (whatever his weights is) pounds of unnecessary fat, and now you're free to really live your life. {hugs}

jadeblack81

IN LOVE?!?! Holy *kitten*. And how much younger than him is she? So now that they have established that they are in love, are they going to have some cyber wedding? And create little avitar babies? Sounds like a healthy relationship. I just want to drive over there and punch him in his hairy little face. >:-(

And this is one of the reasons I miss you so much!!! She's 23...and ugly!

salcha76

Congratulations! You are going to start on a new path....without that person! Make it a wonderful journey......work on being a better you....and a few months or years down the road when you bump into them you'll smile & thank them:) Stay strong, just keep swimming, you'll be ok:)

amysue21

Whatever you do DO NOT let this get you behind! I'm not letting it stop me...and my ex works at the gym I go to! I'm taking myself on in there and doing my thing. Keep your chin up!

TigressPat

Thanks guys. My boyfriend of 10 years met someone through the Playstation network and they are "in love". There's more to it than that, but I was totally blindsided. I missed my run yesterday...but have gotten some activity in, i.e. piling his crap up and chucking at glass candle at him.

and you didn't smash the PS?

TigressPat

Thanks guys. My boyfriend of 10 years met someone through the Playstation network and they are "in love". There's more to it than that, but I was totally blindsided. I missed my run yesterday...but have gotten some activity in, i.e. piling his crap up and chucking at glass candle at him.

Excellent anaerobic work, keep it up ;-)

Jerk. It's for the better. Playstation network? As in, he had enough of some kind of life on there to do whatever? In about 18 months, that is going to be hilarious to you. Take care.

I second that. Might take a bit longer than 18 months though if it was a ten year relationship, but it will come.