To All the Working Moms out there.

KrysKiss87

Disclaimer- This is semi fitness related but also an issue I dealt with personally.
I wrote a blog on this, but I am curious about the opinions of the masses.

I have a 5 month old son. I adore him. Because I adore him I work to make sure our money stretches far enough to cover our bills. We recently put him into daycare and I have received alot of backlash from family and "friends" Who apparently think that I am a horrible person who is abandoning my child because I am working and not home with him. I also go to the gym briefly after work (for about 30 minutes to an hour) So he is usually one of the last kiddos there by the time I pick him up. I had alot of the same people saying I was being selfish for "abandoning him at daycare" I have stopped going and instead I work out at home going for walks with him and then doing zumba or a bodyweight circuit while he watches me and giggles at how silly I look. Is it really selfish of me to want to lose weight and be healthier to keep up with my son?Thoughts on this issue? Comments? Snide remarks?

LauraHS1988

As another working mom I definitely get how you feel. Also had a "few" people that I know of, not directly to me but generalize and brag about how they can stay home with their kids all day and raise them properly, and they dont dump them with a babysitter blah blah blah. Great for them...glad their spouse makes enough to support them thats awesome.
However there are many people that are not as lucky and NEED to work to support their child and family to make sure they are fed, clothed and happy.

It is NOT selfish of you to want to be healthy and a good example for your son. If you stop caring about your health and become sick, then how are you going to take of him then right?
You are entitled to have some time for yourself. I admit I still feel guilty when I want to go out and do something without my son. For the most part though I will do things when he takes a nap, when hes sleeping, or on my lunch hour at work.
Don't worry about others, you do your workouts to do something for yourself!

DawnieB1977

I'm a working mum too. A happy mum = a happy baby. Exercising and having some 'me' time makes me feel better and therefore makes me a better mum. I also go to the gym after work when I can before picking my kids up.

I'm lucky that in England we can have a year off for maternity leave, and I've been able to go back 3 days a week. I'd love to stay at home but unfortunately my husband doesn't earn enough. The only criticisms I've had have been from older colleagues who are from a generation where house prices were a lot lower and you could pay a mortgage on one salary.

I bet no-one would criticise a dad for being in the gym instead of at home.

jenncornelsen

I hear ya. With my first child I went back to work full time when she was 3 months. There was no choice we needed the money. I had many people including family question my life. But they sure werent offering to pay my bills. Second time around my husband is doing better at work so I only work part time. People still question me. I tell them I like working, my kids learn how to ineract with others, and it works for us. I too used to go to the gym right after work. Helped me destress.its your life u do whats best for ur family and ignore those who dont get it

noclady1995

I used to feel the same guilt when my oldest was little and I was working a stressful job where I was having to commute far and work longer hours. Because the community of women I knew were predominantly stay-at-home moms. Thankfully, they seemed to understand that some women have to financially help support their family. But I always let my insecurities get to me. At any rate, I don't think you should feel guilty for taking an extra 30-60 min to be healthy for your family. I know many stay-at-home moms who go to the gym and drop their kids off at the gym daycare...there's not really a difference.

whatatime2befit

I have 3 kids, and have always worked. The first two I took a years mat leave, for the 3rd, I only took around 2 months. I have gotten some opinions on continuing to work, but I spent years in university and college, and chose to have both a career and family. Being a "working" mom or SAH mom, one isn't better or worse than the other. You do what is best for you, your family and your life situation. I love my work and I love my family. There's no reason why you have to have one or the other.

As for going to the gym, I fit that in at night when the kids go to bed, or during my lunch hour. I don't really have a babysitter (beyond my husband) to leave my kids with, so I fit my gym time to times that don't impact the family much.

sexysize12

Do what works best for you and your family, happy mommy, wife happy life.

I tried daycare twice when my daughter was under 5 it didn't work for us and i wasn't comfortable with one of the providers, so I stayed home until she went to preschool/kindergarten. I wouldn't change those years for anything, because children grow so fast. So fast that she is an adult now with her own little girl who I care for while her mom is in the last 6 months of completing her BS then will start working, until she figures out her daycare situation she will be with me. When my daughter was s child I had lots of family help if and when needed. Every family is different and as long as your baby is happy, safe, fed, changed and well d for I don't see the problem unless they want to take over and can provide care

sexysize12

welled care for if family isn't going to be the care for your baby they should really stop the negativity. Your health is just as important as the care of your child. As long as you did your research and background check of the daycare, babysitter, nanny even if you know them for safety sake. Care providers are a blessing especially when you find the ones who are happy with their job and whi communicate with the parents and children no matter the age. Continue doing what's best for you☺

DawnieB1977

sexysize12 wrote: »

welled care for if family isn't going to be the care for your baby they should really stop the negativity. Your health is just as important as the care of your child. As long as you did your research and background check of the daycare, babysitter, nanny even if you know them for safety sake. Care providers are a blessing especially when you find the ones who are happy with their job and whi communicate with the parents and children no matter the age. Continue doing what's best for you☺

In England childcare providers have to be OfSTED registered and have CRB checks, so they're all safe to use.

veganbettie

I work and have a 2.5 year old. My son is one of the most well rounded kids out of our groups of friends because he is at preschool with other kids.

When he was that little I would just go on walks with him, i couldn't sacrifice much more of my time away from him, i would rather be with him....now i just run in the morning when both him and his dad are still sleeping.

Its your family, you know what's best.