Question For All You Single Ladies About Dating!

Soon2BeSkinny321
Soon2BeSkinny321 Posts: 13 Member
edited November 16 in Chit-Chat
Are any of you doing what I'm doing & taking a break from dating right now and don't plan on going on dates, etc. again until you lose a certain number of pounds or reach a certain size? (Due to feeling self conscious about your weight or perhaps for other reasons). If so, what weight and/or size do you want to get down to before you start dating again?

Replies

  • MissMary75044
    MissMary75044 Posts: 517 Member
    I'm taking a break from dating because I keep meeting guys that are no good. If you want to lose weight to feel better about yourself, by all means go for it, but I've found as women we are way harder on our bodies than men are. Sure there are some men that only want a slim or physically fit woman, but the majority of guys are pretty accepting of different body types.
  • shiraLA
    shiraLA Posts: 272 Member
    I think that losing weight really helps with confidence which is big when you are putting yourself out there. However, I feel like you should still go out on dates if you are mentally ready, which is equally important. While being physically attracted to someone is important, you want the guy to be focused on the person that you are. Don't stop living your life while you are working on yourself, you have to enjoy it. :)
  • HumboldtFred
    HumboldtFred Posts: 159 Member
    I am a single guy but my situation is similar. I took a three year break from dating just so I could learn what it is like to actually be single. I was married from 18-35 so I really did not know how to be alone. I just recently started putting myself back out there and yes it is easier(anxiety) to go out when I am lighter and stronger, even if I am no where near my goals.

    Just so you ladies know; As a man, a nice pretty face and a genuine personality trumps physical shape for many of us. My personal experience has been that many beautiful shapes come attached to very ugly people. Good luck out there.
  • MikaMojito
    MikaMojito Posts: 680 Member
    Nope. I broke up with my long-term partner June last year and started dating late August. I weighed in at around 200lbs at 5ft6, so not exactly elven maiden here. I had a semi-serious fling with a guy first. An ex of his had told me he like girls on the big side but I was still majorly scared of undressing in front of him. That fling did a lot for my self-confidence. First time of getting to bed with somebody who wasn't in love with me and he still thought I was hot.

    So I started dating and met some lovely guys. None of them had specified that they prefered big women but all of them asked for 2nd dates. Big boost for my self-confidence again. Then I met a young man online and we hit it off immediately. He was also self-conscious about his weight but I think he looks great and he loves my look as well. We're both losing weight now because we want to be fitter and healthier and even more attractive for each other.

    I like it this way, also because with him I know he wasn't first attracted by my looks. I might have an accident or get ill and not look like I do now. With him I'm pretty confident he'd still like me. And I would hate to have missed the chance of meeting this man just because I was too scared of men not being attracted to me.
  • Jessica_L_E
    Jessica_L_E Posts: 1,969 Member
    Haha you really want to get me going on this topic....I'm taking a break from dating because like someone above mentioned the men haven't been all that awesome. I've had several lie about really being married and just being liars in general and playing games. Of course I'd like to lose more weight...but If they are going to judge you by your cover then they may not be worth your time...
  • shiraLA
    shiraLA Posts: 272 Member
    I'm taking a break from dating because I keep meeting guys that are no good. If you want to lose weight to feel better about yourself, by all means go for it, but I've found as women we are way harder on our bodies than men are. Sure there are some men that only want a slim or physically fit woman, but the majority of guys are pretty accepting of different body types.

    This too^^^
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  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    I'm a widow, but I tried dating and men just stress me. I'm enjoying just talking and such. I don't need anyone needing anything from me.
  • MikaMojito
    MikaMojito Posts: 680 Member
    Oh come on folks, don't give up on them. So my last boyfriend was an idiot who cheated and tried to turn my friends against me. But the one before was gentle, caring, trustworthy, and so many more good things but I was too young and stupid to understand. And my current partner is a man I would be proud to call my friend and I'm over the moon that he's my partner. I've seen how he acts when he sees unjust or potentially dangerous situations. He's a gentle soul but always willing to put himself on the line when he sees other getting hurt. He listens. He confides. He's not scared of feelings.

    And that's what my mates are like, too.

    It just matters what kind of guys you surround yourselves with. Maybe I'm just lucky but I have faith in the male half of the population. Also, I'm trying to find girlfriends for several lovely guys in their late 20s in southern Germany ;-) Any takers? I'll vouch for them not being *kitten*!
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