He doesn't even know what failure is.

Gabrielm80

So I spent the day moving furniture around trying to find the best set up for my 3rd child to learn to walk in. Up until now we had been keeping him in a very contained play area where all his toys are he can crawl to each, and he was totally fine playing in his baby "jail" while I cooked dinner or folded cloths. But that's changing now, he's pulling himself up and standing, sometimes without holding anything, so the gates come down and the newly arranged living room is open so he can learn to walk. That's when it hit me, my son is better at failing than most of us. He doesn't know what failure is, thus he doesn't let the outcome of his actions be dictated to how much he fails. He stands up; holds himself up; legs give out; he falls signaling to his brain to crawl to the next area of the living room and than like clockwork picking himself up looking around trying to move than failing down again. He's ten months old so the probability for his muscles and balance to be ready for full steps in just a day or so though not impossible but is improbable. So as the last few days that he has been standing not once has he reached his goal. Even yet he so often failing so bad he can't get up right away and defaults to crawling for a second or two before getting back up. Imagine how successful we could be if we treated failure like a baby does. We skipped the gym the last few days and ate way to much while having way too many beers at the restaurant with friends, or we just self destructed and quit for a month or so and gained everything back. How ever we fail if we just remember that failure is part of success than we could save a lot of unneeded stress. We can allow ourselves to not acknowledge failure, and just remember to get back up. How can we succeed when so many of us get stuck when we fail. Which is why we fail at failure. We let the act of gaining weight after losing a bunch of weight ruin our self esteem. Destroy our drive and cripple our diet. We would rather give up at times than have to work through a plateau that doesn't seem to go away. We stink at failure, just about all of us. And why does it have to be a hill we have to overcome. It can be just part of the road we drive over toward the destination of success.
News flash we are all going to fail at this, but what are you going to do about that.

cyl544

Nice post

Runninglibrarian13

Cute lil man!

And you're right.. if we just got up and tried again, just like a baby does... it would be so much better! Heck, even the babies who sit on the floor and cry a minute about 'failing' (falling) are soon up and at it again!
I lead a baby and toddler storytime, so I get to see a lot of baby behavior....but I never thought of it in terms of dieting / exercise/ weight loss setbacks!

healthygreek

He is so adorable!!!!!
The way I get around the failure thing is to never think of it as failure-it's just the journey with all it's ups and downs and starts and stops! In other words, life!

Ms_LisaKay

I love this post.

I feel like a baby to all this calorie regulating, nutrition, and fitness stuff. I have gone for most of 40 years purposely ignoring anything to do with real knowledge and practical experience regarding health. So as I am trying to lose weight and get fit, I have lots of fails. I have setbacks, days (sometimes weeks) where I give up, and times where old habits just kick in. I still haven't crossed the biggest of my health hurdles.

But I want to be like your little cutie. I may be crawling now, but I -really- want to walk. That walking thing looks so cool, and the people doing it look like they really enjoy it. Heck, that stage where they have all the mechanics down and go really fast and zoom around obstacles looks pretty amazing too. (This is a metaphor, walking & running are not my preferred exercise goals, but the people who have moved through stages of knowledge about fitness amaze & inspire me.) Thanks for sharing this perspective.

zoeysasha37

Your baby is beautiful and this is a nice post. :-) :-)

jezzyrae

I will now think of babies when I am feeling pathetic. I'll remember that they didn't give up when learning to walk. Great analogy for me. Easy to remember since I have 4 kids. Thanks

shadowfax_c11

In the dojo we talk about failure as the place where we are learning the most. If you are not willing to fail many times you will never learn or change.

As a parent make sure that your child keeps his willingness to fail many times as he grows and learns. As a society we are so focused on celebrating successes and rewarding them that we turn failure into a thing to be feared and avoided. As adults we become so afraid of failing, looking bad or silly that we start to avoid trying new things or give up on goals. What a shame to loose that fearless freedom to fail that a small child benefits from so much.

In martial arts there is a saying.

Fall down seven times, stand up eight.

lian27chime

Love reading your post! So very true.

Gabrielm80

Thank you all for the kind words

Gabrielm80

He was dancing and fell and continued to bounce to the music.

lauracups

That
was
AWESOME! !!!!!

Gabrielm80

Thank you @lauracups

Gabrielm80

Update he still isn't walking and still doesn't know what failure is. He is now standing unsupported for minutes, but still must crawl to move around.

Gabrielm80

Bump

tanismartineau

Great post. It definitely helps me to think of it this way, get back up and on the right track. Thanks.

Gabrielm80

Thank you