Depression = Lack of motivation

pearson114

Hi,

I'm wondering if anyone else is in the same slippery slope as I am. I have previously lost 29lbs, but gradually put it back on. I've known there's been something wrong for some time but I finally built up the courage to go and speak with my doctor just over a month ago and he diagnosed me with depression.

I have been putting on weight due to overeating and lack of exercise, and I know this, and I want to stop it, but I don't have any motivation to. I know all I need is to change my eating habits slightly, and go for a run once a day - that's all I did last time. But everyday I just think, I'll do it tomorrow, and then tomorrow I think the same thing.

It's difficult to explain to those who have never suffered depression, but to those who have - how did you overcome it?

thegreatcanook

I know the ups and downs. Feel free to ad me for support!

ReynaDay01

The best way might be to find a friend/co-worker/family member to encourage you and do it with you. Once you get in a routine of this you will enjoy it and start looking forward to it. Even talking to a friend might help. Good luck!

MeanderingMammal

pearson114 wrote: »

It's difficult to explain to those who have never suffered depression, but to those who have - how did you overcome it?

The most useful points really depend on what your Dr has diagnosed in terms of supporting your management of the depression.

For me, it became a question of recognising that I had to put in place the right habits, and the way to do that was to force myself to do something towards it. So in this case:

• Set up MFP to give you the calorie goal
• Record your intake and aim to land at, or a little below, your goal each day
• If you do want to exercise then give yourself some structure, a plan of some kind. A plan gives you goals.
• Reward yourself for hitting goals

A goal might be completing your logging every day for a week, or completing your planned training sessions every day for a week.

Small steps, then keep challenging yourself to make each step a little longer

okeefester3

I've been through similar slumps and I have found that if i can just force myself to do it once, the next day is much easier to keep going. Something about those endorphins will help your depression if you can just take that first step.

I also find that not putting too much pressure on myself helps too, I allow myself to walk instead of run while I rebuild my endurance. That keeps me from getting discouraged. Good luck!

MonsoonStorm

Stop thinking that you "should" go for a run. Too many "shoulds" = feelings of failure and that just maintains the vicious cycle.

Make your goals smaller, much smaller. Make them daily goals, heck, even hourly goals if you need to. There is no "tomorrow", live for now. Do what you can, now, and give yourself credit for the small goals you achieve.

Exercise *will* make you feel better. I know it's hard to get to that point, but it really does help. But make those exercise goals small to begin with. Try to turn them in to habits and take it from there. Start with simple things like walking to the shop instead of driving etc. Don't give yourself a chance to think about it or talk yourself out of it. Shoes on and go. If even that feels like too much, perhaps look into something like mindfulness meditation and start with committing to that, then work from there.

Food, break it down a bit. Don't go for massive all out changes. Choose one thing to do and stick to it for a week. Next week add another thing etc etc.

Most importantly, if it all goes wrong, accept it and start again. Don't hold on to the self-blame, don't hold on to the negative thoughts. Just move on.

It can be done, it is possible.

You can do it

999tigger

In the times you are feeling less overwhelmed then you need a simple plan of small steps to improve your daily habits and do things which will isolate you less and make you happier. the weight gain ccould just be symtomayic of everything else that has led to the depression.

Some good advice above like going for a walk, cooking a meal, just doingg things which enhance your life a little bit. Exercise cna be highly effective is helping lift mild depression.
If its deeper, then id not hesitate to get some medication.

pearson114

All good advice, thank you - especially Monsoon Storm. I'll do it! I'll get there

nicola8989

I have suffered for depression for 10+ years and I know how hard it is to motivate yourself. Can you start with the exercise? I know people probably say it to you all the time and exercise isn't a miracle cure, but it does make you feel better and then you might be able to face eating less. Exercise has worked wonders for my anxiety and depression - of course it doesn't happen over night but it really does help once you're into it. Set yourself mini goals and take it slow, don't be too hard on yourself x

RoxieDawn

First of all, you do not have to exercise to lose weight.. with this said and if you want to ease in exercise or a walk or a run do this on the days when you feel more upbeat or energetic...

Did the doctor give you medication? If so has it been enough time for the medication to be repeatedly administered and have an effect?

Alidecker

It's tough because exercise can help with the depression, but motivating yourself to exercise seems almost impossible when you are depressed.

Schedule your exercise time, just like you would a meeting for work. Sometimes that makes it harder to skip. Find someone to meet you and walk with your or workout with.

I also find that when I am feeling really down, I write in a journal. It has helped me more than I ever thought it would with depression.

1Foot2Foot

For me it was anti-depressants and therapy, they helped me tremendously and gave me some stability that I needed to make changes. It wasn't until after I was on them for a while that I realized just how bad it was because when you're in the midst of it it is so difficult to have perspective. I was on a prescription for about a year, and have been off for the last 2+ and now that I better understand how depression works I'm better able to recognize and be proactive when it starts creeping back.

I was really hesitant to try it, but I would encourage you to have a conversation with your doctor and see a therapist.

Alidecker

1Foot2Foot wrote: »

For me it was anti-depressants and therapy, they helped me tremendously and gave me some stability that I needed to make changes. It wasn't until after I was on them for a while that I realized just how bad it was because when you're in the midst of it it is so difficult to have perspective. I was on a prescription for about a year, and have been off for the last 2+ and now that I better understand how depression works I'm better able to recognize and be proactive when it starts creeping back.

I was really hesitant to try it, but I would encourage you to have a conversation with your doctor and see a therapist.

I agree with you on this. Also,my best friends are also very helpful when I finally talked to them about what was going on with me. Now when I tell them I am in a "funk", they understand when I pull away and they do what they can to help me from going to a darker place. I don't let it go and get even worse like a did several years ago.

zyxst

I can't help with getting over depression. Mine is here to stay (23 years since diagnosed), meds and therapy didn't help, so I deal along as best I can.

mamabear1114

ReynaDay01 wrote: »

The best way might be to find a friend/co-worker/family member to encourage you and do it with you. Once you get in a routine of this you will enjoy it and start looking forward to it. Even talking to a friend might help. Good luck!

I agree with this totally. I suffer from depression and anxiety both, so I am too depressed to get out of bed, but then I get anxious about not getting up, lol. I go walking in the park with my Granny (she is 62) and it helps a lot! In fact, eating well and exorcising may alleviate some of the depression.

pearson114

gia - I have been prescribed Citalopram, and CB Therapy, although this doesn't begin until June. I have felt a difference in terms of being able to control my emotions better, however it hasn't helped me feel motivated in anything - from walking the dog to going to work, everything is still a chore and I'd rather stay in bed all day. And that's not usually me.

MommaWho

I'm in this same boat. While I haven't been diagnosed with depression recently, I have suffered with it before. Feel free to add me for support if needed. you can do it!

mzlizzi

I find that focusing on one small accomplishment helps me feel good about my capability and motivates me to do more.

But the focus really needs to be on the one small accomplishment, and not on the next step. Otherwise, I might feel overwhelmed.

The focus also needs to involve the question: If I do this, am I taking care of myself?

What's an example of one small accomplishment?

Eating a healthy breakfast and logging it right away.

When I plan, prepare, and eat a healthy breakfast and then see it on the MFP screen, I feel good that I followed through with a planned action. I feel good that I have given myself good nourishment. And then I feel motivated to do the same for lunch.

Blazing_Brunette

Support of understanding friends and a routine workout that makes you feel rejuvenated... Add me if you want...

MeanderingMammal

pearson114 wrote: »

gia - I have been prescribed Citalopram, and CB Therapy, although this doesn't begin until June.

The crux of CBT is just what you're asking about. How can you force change in your behaviour to help you with the health related issues.

Personally I found talking therapies more useful to me than CBT per se, but what I've described above is one of the tools that you'll get from it.

Personally I'm not particularly receptive to uncritical cheerleading, so for me things need to be a bit crunchier and outcome focussed. There is a need to understand yoruself, and how you respond. Are you carrot or stick driven? What results do you want and how can you express those in a meaningful way.

Two years ago, when I started to lose weight and train more seriously, I very quickly discovered that I'm not driven by weight, but by running performance. So the latter is what I track and train towards. I'm a little carrot oriented, but more so stick and I'm my own biggest critic, so it's working within that to mitigate how I engage with myself.

As an example, I was in a 10K race yesterday. Beat my previous PB for the course by three minutes, but within an hour was planning how to iprove on that time again next time. The CBT should help you understand yourself and give you some tools to work with that.

mzlizzi

gia07 wrote: »

First of all, you do not have to exercise to lose weight..

Gia, I think your point is important.

I have been using MFP to log food since January and it was only two days ago that I finally went to the gym. Before that I mainly did occasional outdoor walks and hid my body under loose sweaters. I dreaded thinking about pulling on my swimsuit to do laps in the gym pool.

Now that I've lost over 15 pounds, I feel more confident and I actually look forward to going to the gym. I feel like I can be a "swimmer" again!

Note that I intentionally took things slowly. I probably could have lost more weight, but I didn't want to torture my mind or my body to achieve what I felt was an unreasonable goal.

mzlizzi

pearson114 wrote: »

I have previously lost 29lbs...

Pearson, I am wondering: what was your motivation when you previously lost that weight?

gramarye

I think it's a really individual thing; for me, the control that calorie counting provided actually helped ease my anxiety symptoms, especially when there was little else of my life that I was in control of at the time.

That said, it really depends on what triggers your bad days, and working with that. Are you seeing a therapist? Having an objective professional to check in with and discuss emotional strategy with helps a lot of my friends who struggle with depression (some of which have also lost a lot of weight, so the two are compatible).

And I'd agree with people that point out that exercise is not critical here. I lost most of the weight through the past two years just on calorie restriction; I only started going to the gym in the last few months, to keep myself going as I get closer to my goal.

pearson114

mzlizzi, in March 2013 my friend posted a photo of me on Facebook of a night out. I didn't recognise myself on the photo. That was the motivation. Now, I look in the mirror and I'm not necessarily pleased with what I see, but it doesn't affect me as much as it did back then, and there's more going on. More going on at work, more going on at home with the kids, there's a new baby due in 5-6 weeks time, I'm not happy with how I look, and I know I need to change before it gets worse (which it will if I don't do anything), but it hasn't given me that kick that I need. I know to some it will sound like I'm making excuses and being lazy - but it's not that, there's something else blocking it and I don't know what.

csmullins78

I completely understand where you are coming from. It is the very same for me, but severe stress coupled with depression contributed to a 25 pound weight gain recently.

Here's some things that have helped me in the past (from recommendations my therapist made):

1. Take 15 minutes every night to put some music on and dance. Nothing makes a person feel better than dancing like no one's watching, and, since it's exercise, it WILL make you feel better. (This was also really helpful when I was going through a bad depression because it was something fun to do with my daughter).
2. Self-care - For some, this means taking a nice, long, bath. For others, it might be meditation. When depression gets really bad, it can be hard to get out of bed or even take a shower. Taking care of yourself is a big step to help!
3. Medication - If your doctor prescribed meds, take them, even after you feel better. Don't just stop taking them without talking to your doctor.
4. Positive affirmations - These really do help, even though it feels weird at first. Loving yourself makes a huge difference in your life!
5. Friendships - Don't isolate yourself! It's the first thing I want to do when I start feeling down. Your friends are there and want to support you.
6. Emotional eating - This is what I do... It's hard to stop, but it only contributes to depression. Try (but don't beat up on yourself if you struggle) to do something, anything, other than eating when you're depressed and not hungry. Now that the weather is warming up, just go outside and sit or take a walk. Getting a bit of sun can also do wonders for your mood!

Feel free to friend me!

suke28

Everyone feel free to add me. I was just going to post something similar. However, I've been battling depression since the 1990s I just happen to have a very optimist best friend which helps. Plus I try to stick to the mantra, one day at a time.

suke28

zyxst wrote: »

I can't help with getting over depression. Mine is here to stay (23 years since diagnosed), meds and therapy didn't help, so I deal along as best I can.

This is pretty much myself. You deal the best you can.

ElizabethKalmbach

I think of my workouts as necessary medicine. Exercise really helps my depression and gives me something to focus on, when all my other problems seem vague. It's not that I "should" workout - it's that I must, because it's part of the treatment that keeps me alive. No less important than taking my thyroid supplement and b12 shots.

Once I've made myself work out every day for 3 weeks, I generally notice that it's a habit again and something I just *do* without having to "make" myself anything. After a couple months, I notice that I even *look forward* to the focused "alone" time.

Grant yourself the endorphin rush of exercise. It is good treatment for depression. Go with someone who looks forward to the time. My kid and my dogs LOVE going out for a walk. They will NEVER let me forget when it's time to go. They will never let me forget that I *promised* we would go. Make a commitment to help yourself, and keep it.

nitaaaaa

Hi there. I had actually initially gained about 40lbs in 4 months from a previous depressive episode in which I was prescribed abilify. Everyone reacts to different medications differently, but it is important to check in frequently with your doctor when starting something new (mine waited three months, damage had already been done, current doc checks in weekly when adjusting meds). Since then I had lost about 20lbs but gained it back plus more during another depressive episode a few years later. For the longest time I thought, if I can only lose the weight, I wouldn't be depressed. My doctor correctly told me that once I am no longer depressed, I will more easily be able to lose the weight. My advice is to cut yourself some slack, don't binge or over indulge but don't be so hard on yourself either. Focus on getting your mental health repaired, and then gradually add in the weight loss as you feel better. I have found other medicines and habits that have helped me overcome much of my depression and have lost 15lbs. Hoping to lose more, but not hating myself everyday puts me at a huge advantage over how I felt before.

Feel free to add me as a friend too! I haven't used the forum much but want to start more.

gvj777

bump

amandadawncraw

I have dealt with depression since the early 2000's and I still struggle every day. Of course some days are better than others. I am currently in the same boat with motivation. I have all these friends who are working out and doing well and I know I need to get on track but couldn't find the motivation. I finally hung up my size 9 jeans to keep me going. Today was the first day of doing better...I decided to start small with no sweets and only drinking water and just started today. I say start small and find the goal/activity, etc that lights your fire and once you get going the exercise will kick in the natural endorphins which will help with the depression. Feel free to add me as a friend and I will help as best I can with answering any questions and giving support. Good luck!