unsupported people

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bigcrystal123
bigcrystal123 Posts: 246 Member
in Motivation and Support
Everybody around me is so unsupportive of me losing weight.i only have a few people that supports me like my boyfriend, dad, and grandma and also my brother girlfriend.my mom says im too big to ever wear a binkini again that i should wear a one piece swimsuit. If i feel comfortable wearing a binkini i will wear one.i always have and most likely always will.then today i told my best friend i lost 8 ounces she goes what only 8 ounces.it hurts when people say that stuff to me.like im trying to better myself and they are trying to bring me down cause they are overweight.its not my fault that they feel that way.i just wish people around me was more supportive. I get more support on here then i do in person.
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Replies

  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    you got 4 people to support you. I'd run with that.
  • thatonegirlinohio
    thatonegirlinohio Posts: 50 Member
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    It sucks not having a bunch of people to support you, but I've only got 2 in person! Every day I remember I'm doing this for me and not for anyone else and most days that's all it takes. When it doesn't, I come here. :)
  • Britterboo22
    Britterboo22 Posts: 300 Member
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    dont feel bad i have unsupportive people in my life too but you gotta hang on to the ones who are supportive.

    YOU CAN fit into a bikini again! hard work and healthy choices pay off!!!
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,893 Member
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    I count at least 4 people you have named who support you. That is more than a lot of people have. Ignore your mom and maybe your best friend was just having a crappy day. 8 ounces is better than a gain, be happy about it. I don't even bother telling anyone about what I'm doing. I don't figure it's much of their business. If they bring it up it should be to say something nice or they can stuff it.
  • happythermia
    happythermia Posts: 374
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    It sucks, but don't let anyone get you down! :-)
  • 5n0wbal1
    5n0wbal1 Posts: 429 Member
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    You've got more IRL support than I do! My hubby "says" he supports me, but he thinks the life changes I'm making I won't be able to sustain (like eating more fruits and veggies).
  • buckshot1969
    buckshot1969 Posts: 87
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    It sucks but you do it for you and no one else. You have support on this site!!! Good luck keep going! :happy:
  • dorthymcconnel
    dorthymcconnel Posts: 237 Member
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    In person right now I have one who is supportive - my husband. But there are many here who support me, because they are in the same battle I am. Not everyone is going to be supportive, for whatever reason. The biggest I've seen is they simply don't know how. But that's okay.Do this for you and continue doing well. Talk to the supportive ones who will cheerlead you on to victory.
  • mmm_drop
    mmm_drop Posts: 1,126 Member
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    In the end its all about you.

    You have more support in your life than most people do. You have to dismiss the negative commentary and just go with the positive and be grateful for the people who are supportive in your life.
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
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    The reality is that at some point, you have to rely on yourself and be grateful for the support you get. Relying on outside support is tricky and can be dangerous. It's tricky because external motivators are inconsistent and may not always be there. It's dangerous because when those external motivators are inconsistent or not there, then what?

    I'm not saying a support group isn't powerful (and even needed sometimes). What I am saying is that focusing on motivating yourself might be a goal to think about. Feeling support from friends and family is great. But if I depend on it, I'm destined for disappointment.

    The beauty of moving away from a dependence on external support has an amazing side effect - it makes external negativity less important and less impactful.
  • Bekahmardis
    Bekahmardis Posts: 602 Member
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    I'm one of those pushy-supportive people. If I have a friend who sees what I'm doing and wants to join in, I immediately start supporting them with the "set up a MFP account!' "Let's go walk!" "Here, I'll let you borrow my hand weights to help get you started!"

    I think they hate ever mentioning it to me, but if they're silly enough to tell me they want to start be durned if I'm gonna let them fall behind! :)
  • drojen
    drojen Posts: 203 Member
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    You've more support than I have. Mind you, I don't tend to share with a lot of people - been around long enough to know many folks either a) don't care, or b) will be jealous which turns into all kinds of crap. Sad statement of human beings, but there you go. I figure I'm only doing this for me, so I'm the only one whose opinion matters. As I say, that's just what I've seen of the people around me (I talk more specifically of co-workers than family - although I don't share with my family either). I figure the people in my family have their own struggles, I don't want to them to think I'm "rubbing their noses" in it by talking of my successes. They have to find their own path, they don't need reminding. That said, I do not have anyone in my family who would ever say mean things to me. They just don't acknowledge anything at all. Which is worse? Having snide comments or never getting acknowledgement at all? I think I'd rather no acknowledgement, but that may be because that's what I'm used to, LOL.
  • HeizelEyes
    HeizelEyes Posts: 7
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    Look at it this way, if you don't take care of you, no one will. Just because they don't want to do something about it, doesn't mean you have to follow along...be your own person! You really want to do this!? Then, do so...if you don't do it, no one will. Plus, for people like that, I love it when I get to prove them wrong. Then, I can actually say "What's your excuse!?" People don't care about feelings, that's why I don't worry about them either...if you're doing the very best you can, then keep it up! Do it for yourself, not for anyone else. The most important part to remember is that you have to keep pushing and make that time for you, not anyone else! Keep your head up and don't falter...if you really want it, you'll find a way to accomplish it! :happy:
  • iulia_maddie
    iulia_maddie Posts: 2,780 Member
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    I don't have anyone holding my hand through this. It's up to me, just like it's up to you.
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
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    I don't have anyone holding my hand through this. It's up to me, just like it's up to you.

    BUT I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND. :sad:





    Or your butt. Can I hold your butt?




    Even though this will ruin the joke, note to mods: I'm just kidding! Sort of..
  • CrankMeUp
    CrankMeUp Posts: 2,860 Member
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    The reality is that at some point, you have to rely on yourself and be grateful for the support you get. Relying on outside support is tricky and can be dangerous. It's tricky because external motivators are inconsistent and may not always be there. It's dangerous because when those external motivators are inconsistent or not there, then what?

    I'm not saying a support group isn't powerful (and even needed sometimes). What I am saying is that focusing on motivating yourself might be a goal to think about. Feeling support from friends and family is great. But if I depend on it, I'm destined for disappointment.

    The beauty of moving away from a dependence on external support has an amazing side effect - it makes external negativity less important and less impactful.

    :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • iulia_maddie
    iulia_maddie Posts: 2,780 Member
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    I don't have anyone holding my hand through this. It's up to me, just like it's up to you.

    BUT I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND. :sad:





    Or your butt. Can I hold your butt?




    Even though this will ruin the joke, note to mods: I'm just kidding! Sort of..

    You can hold my everything.:flowerforyou:
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    The thread title is misleading. I thought that, perhaps, there was finally a thread about people that couldn't be helped.

    Oh wait. OP's "everyone" is unsupportive. With 4 people who support her. Case in point.
  • pspetralia
    pspetralia Posts: 963 Member
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    The reality is that at some point, you have to rely on yourself and be grateful for the support you get. Relying on outside support is tricky and can be dangerous. It's tricky because external motivators are inconsistent and may not always be there. It's dangerous because when those external motivators are inconsistent or not there, then what?

    I'm not saying a support group isn't powerful (and even needed sometimes). What I am saying is that focusing on motivating yourself might be a goal to think about. Feeling support from friends and family is great. But if I depend on it, I'm destined for disappointment.

    The beauty of moving away from a dependence on external support has an amazing side effect - it makes external negativity less important and less impactful.

    This!
  • JeffseekingV
    JeffseekingV Posts: 3,165 Member
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    I don't think I have one real life supporter of my workouts that include heavy squats / deads / bench / powerclearns etc..

    They approach fitness their way and I do it my way. You don't need support of others if you know your fitness plan is sound and correct for YOU.

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