I want to suceed this time!

bubaluboo

Hello super maintainers! Apologies for a long post...skip down if too much. In 2013 I lost 39lb going from a BMI of 26.5 to 20. I was so pleased that I'd surpassed the BMI of 23 (where I normally was before pregnancy and post baby binging) that I thought was my limit. It was easy to get there and I did it slowly over about 8 months (I lost a chunk at first in water weight and then settled to about 0.5lb per week).

I still felt that I could stand to lose 7lb vanity weight as I have a small frame and even with a BMI of 20 I still have a wobbly pear shape but that didn't happen. Anyhow, I maintained until 2014 summer holidays started and with them more eating and less logging which kept on until my birthday in March. Over that time I gained back 19lb. I was disappointed with myself but actually didn't feel that I'd really over indulged by a massive amount.

***if it's too long start here ***
Now I'm back to logging and eating 1500 calories a day plus exercise calories. I'm losing 0.5-1lb per week which is great and I'm not complaining about that BUT.... I feel like I'm dieting. Like I'm restricting food. I don't have any foods that are 'out' and I lose by moderation rather than finicky dieting. I know that we are supposed to think in terms of lifestyle change instead of dieting but however I look at it, I am eating less than I would like to. I miss that 'stuffed' feeling and of having a 1000 calorie desert or a massive dinner. Feeling comfortably full just doesn't cut it sometimes. Since I'm only losing a little per week, my maintenance level is not going to make a huge difference.

Has anyone else felt this way? How did you get past it. I wonder whether saving calories for occasional binges is the way forward or is that just a downhill progression into a cycle of binge-diet. Does it just get easier if you just stick with it and learn to live with comfortably full.

Never considered I had a bad relationship with food before...but perhaps!

Clarinet722

I think the way to go is to eat foods that you know will make you feel full like whole grain carbohydrates and such. I wouldn't have the 'occasional binge' because the only feeling you get from that is regret and disappointment! Treat yourself everyone once in a while with a meal out with friends or family, but don't go over the top!
Also, if you have bigger quantities of lower calorie foods like vegetables, you can pile your plate with food and feel like you've had a big meal.
Hope this is helpful.

bubaluboo

That does make sense. I guess I don't get huge guilt/regret at binging but rather if I eat cake today you can be sure it's going to be harder for me to resist it the next day. I should pile up the veg more but *whispers* I don't like veg that much (don't tell my 6yr old daughter ha ha).

mistikal13

It helps me to know that I can have the foods that I want everyday in reasonable portions rather than in one huge meal.

wkwebby

If you need that full feeling, then you should go with a keto diet, or some sort of protein and veg heavy sort of eating. Those are the only ones that I know of that can really fill you up that way and you won't blow your calories to hell and back on a normal basis. It really sounds like an unhealthy relationship with food though.

Maybe you can give yourself that feeling once a week, staying away from your trigger foods (sounds like you really like your sweets). Even during your one x per week, you need to stay away from the foods that you can't stop eating or moderate. Until the time that you can eat one piece and be happy or until the time you make peace with food, those foods have to stay away from your menu. Once in a year is ok, on a daily basis, you're going to gain that weight back. What is more important to you? That's the ultimate question that you have to ask yourself when you get that feeling that you want to stuff yourself silly.

Good luck!

bubaluboo

That's a thought wkwebby, if you look at my diary, you'll see that the protein content is always on the low side. However, I did try non-calorie counting Keto diet (for about a month) and found that while I felt full I was obviously eating too much still and actually gained weight! Though I did cope really well without the carbs I guess I compensated with other calories! Perhaps paying attention to protein in the context of a calorie controlled diet would help.

I like to bake and a reasonable (as in about 2/3 the size you'd expect to get in a coffee shop) slice of cake is about 500 cals or a third of my daily allowance. It does seem like a deprivation not to have it anymore. This is why I talk about cake so much ha ha...both my husband and I do make delicious cake! Perhaps I need to experiment and make cake that is less calorific and satisfies my craving!

ahoy_m8

I feel that way all the time. My reality is my maintenance intake is less than I would like. My alternative would be to maintain a higher weight. My choice. I choose to maintain where I am. Sometimes it feels like maintenance is a little more work than it should be, but I'm also really satisfied with my meals most of the time. My TDEE might be similar to yours? I lose about 0.5/wk at 1500. That includes exercise, so I dont "eat back exercise calories."

I would say it gets easier mentally, even when it requires more physical effort as the decades go by. I can't eat as much as when I ran 10 miles/day in my 20's. But then, my eating was a little disordered back then, always bouncing between extremes. I'm in a better place than I was in my 20's, so I can't honestly say I miss it. What made it work for me was learning to eat less but to enjoy it more. That means eating really great tasting stuff that satisfies without having to make up for it in volume. That goes for wine, too.

bubaluboo

Sounds like we're pretty similar in TDEE. I'm enjoying being slim now. Last time I lost the weight I thought I'd never gain again and I'm glad I checked myself before I gained too much. I would much prefer to just maintain within say 6lb. It's all about mindset though isn't it?! It took me a while to get my head around losing the weight but I did it...once that's back to where I want it to be, I just need to keep enjoying the benefits that it brings more than the instant gratification of eating too much of the wrong stuff.

ahoy_m8

Yep, I couldn't have said it better. Enjoy the benefits. And enjoy the food you choose, too!

spoonyspork

I am currently attempting to hit maintenance and am at a calorie goal similar to yours... and stay under that, even though I indulge. I am a volume eater, but usually save the 'volume' for the second half of the day. Feel free to look at my diary -- I eat cake, crisps, fast food, etc and hit most of my goals other than being under on calories.

Try looking up some angle food cake recipes for getting a lot of cake for your calorie buck. Looks like you're in the UK, but here in the US we have a store called Trader Joe's that has this angle food cake that's sweet and dense and just feels SO indulgent, and 1/4 of the cake is only 130 cal. I have it with a side of ice cream and/or fruit.