self satbotage

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  • ruggedshutter
    ruggedshutter Posts: 389 Member
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    I've been doing this recently as well. You want a reward for your hard work and want a little break. Best thing to do is jump back into your routine. I started to slip mostly because I got sick and couldn't workout for a week or so. Then the excuses started back in as to why I shouldn't exercise (need to work on advertising for my business, not enough time, need to finish this for a client....etc) I finally told myself enough is enough and got back into it.
  • meghanduprey
    meghanduprey Posts: 158 Member
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    TimothyFish wrote: »
    meghanduprey wrote: »
    what is wrong with me? it's like i have a subconscious desire to undermine my weightloss efforts. i got down to 172.5 and all of a sudden i feel like i can eat whatever i want or i "deserve" to eat extra all the time even though i know i'm going over my calories. i weighed myself this morning and i'm back up to 174 which isn't a huge increase, but it's an INCREASE. i don't know why i self sabotage like this all the time.

    Are you weighing and measuring everything?

    (Sorry, I couldn't resist.)

    I think it is battle fatigue. That and something called "licensing." People who exercise often "license" themselves to eat more. People who use reusable grocery bags license themselves to buy junk food. We get it in our head that because I did something good, then I deserve to do this other thing. Look for something else to indulge in. Instead of rewarding yourself with food, go buy something or go do something that you've been putting off because it is too expensive or because it would keep you from doing something else that needs to be done.

    Ugh I hate that question! of course i'm weighing and measuring! :p
    that sounds about right, if i put it in a pretty exercise bow it doesn't count (calories). but apparently my logic doesn't actually work.
  • ChristineRoze
    ChristineRoze Posts: 212 Member
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    I do the same thing!! I will count calories and as soon as I'm a few kg's lighter and look better I get in the mind frame that I can eat a treat, which turns into 2 and then next minute I've over eaten the whole week. I think we need to refocus those feelings on something different, like new clothes or a treat that isn't food related :)
  • meghanduprey
    meghanduprey Posts: 158 Member
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    Thank you everyone for letting me know i'm not the only one that does this/feels like this <3

    from what everyone is saying and thinking about it, i think a lot of it is that i've been slogging away for a while now and haven't seen any results and i (without really thinking about it) just said "eff you" to the process, without really thinking through the fact that saying that will take away everything that HAS happened.

    weighed myself this morning and i'm up to 176. again, not sure if it's water weight, but it's in the general direction of UP and that's not cool. i was planning on skipping spinning class but now- not so much!
  • lthames0810
    lthames0810 Posts: 722 Member
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    I'm vulnerable to this when I see the scale start going down. Just today I saw the scale read 2 lbs less than I weighed yesterday morning...obviously water weight from the weekend. But I'm already thinking about not eating the lunch I pre-logged and brought with me to work, but going to the convenience store on the corner and getting a 600 calorie sandwich instead. Classic self sabotage. My warped thinking is going like this: 2lbs in one day is a much faster loss than I had expected so maybe I'm not eating enough, so it'll be okay to overeat today and, because it's not candy, it's all good.

    Typing this all out makes it seem even more ridiculous, so I guess I won't do it afterall. Thanks for bringing up the topic.

    The thing I most resent about the process of losing weight is the loss of spontanaety. Monitoring how much I eat all the time feels like an unnatural act. The thought of having to do it even at maintenance for the rest of my life just makes me feel sorry for myself. I do best when I don't look ahead or behind. Don't think about how long this will take. Don't think about what maintenance will be like. Don't look back at yesterday's success (or failure.) Just deal with what's in front of me right now, today.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
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    meghanduprey wrote: »
    what is wrong with me? it's like i have a subconscious desire to undermine my weightloss efforts. i got down to 172.5 and all of a sudden i feel like i can eat whatever i want or i "deserve" to eat extra all the time even though i know i'm going over my calories. i weighed myself this morning and i'm back up to 174 which isn't a huge increase, but it's an INCREASE. i don't know why i self sabotage like this all the time.

    focus on working out what you're going to do in maintenance

  • meghanduprey
    meghanduprey Posts: 158 Member
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    lthames0810 wrote: »
    I'm vulnerable to this when I see the scale start going down. Just today I saw the scale read 2 lbs less than I weighed yesterday morning...obviously water weight from the weekend. But I'm already thinking about not eating the lunch I pre-logged and brought with me to work, but going to the convenience store on the corner and getting a 600 calorie sandwich instead. Classic self sabotage. My warped thinking is going like this: 2lbs in one day is a much faster loss than I had expected so maybe I'm not eating enough, so it'll be okay to overeat today and, because it's not candy, it's all good.

    Typing this all out makes it seem even more ridiculous, so I guess I won't do it afterall. Thanks for bringing up the topic.

    The thing I most resent about the process of losing weight is the loss of spontanaety. Monitoring how much I eat all the time feels like an unnatural act. The thought of having to do it even at maintenance for the rest of my life just makes me feel sorry for myself. I do best when I don't look ahead or behind. Don't think about how long this will take. Don't think about what maintenance will be like. Don't look back at yesterday's success (or failure.) Just deal with what's in front of me right now, today.

    that's exactly it! i did that with pizza instead of my normal pre-logged meal (this was after a loss). i was like "oh well i'm doing well, i can afford to have pizza now!
    i do resent the weight loss process too. it's such a *kitten*. and it's really never ending, at least for me it's not. i'll never be some one that can NOT weigh stuff/measure stuff/log stuff. my body type and my personality type mean that i'll always put weight on easily if i'm not careful (hence i've lost and gained the same 30lbs about 5-6 times). i'm trying to do this as sanely and least diet-like as i can because it can't be a diet, i can't live like that forever and this has to be forever this time
  • meghanduprey
    meghanduprey Posts: 158 Member
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    rabbitjb wrote: »
    meghanduprey wrote: »
    what is wrong with me? it's like i have a subconscious desire to undermine my weightloss efforts. i got down to 172.5 and all of a sudden i feel like i can eat whatever i want or i "deserve" to eat extra all the time even though i know i'm going over my calories. i weighed myself this morning and i'm back up to 174 which isn't a huge increase, but it's an INCREASE. i don't know why i self sabotage like this all the time.

    focus on working out what you're going to do in maintenance

    what do you mean?
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
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    meghanduprey wrote: »
    rabbitjb wrote: »
    meghanduprey wrote: »
    what is wrong with me? it's like i have a subconscious desire to undermine my weightloss efforts. i got down to 172.5 and all of a sudden i feel like i can eat whatever i want or i "deserve" to eat extra all the time even though i know i'm going over my calories. i weighed myself this morning and i'm back up to 174 which isn't a huge increase, but it's an INCREASE. i don't know why i self sabotage like this all the time.

    focus on working out what you're going to do in maintenance

    what do you mean?

    Because at the moment I imagine you are thinking "when I lose this weight"

    Whereas really you should be thinking "What do I need to do to maintain this weight loss once it's gone"

    I spent a lot of my time whilst I was losing weight thinking about how I would manage my maintenance, rapidly coming to the conclusion that I wouldn't stop logging and actually an extra 250 calories a day (because I was on 0.5lb per week for a long time towards the end) isn't really that much.

    Then I found trendweight.com that gives me a chance to track fluctuations and a trendline (so do happyscale and Libra apps and lots more) .. so that I could see when exercise, sodium, hormones made my scale weight go up but really what that meant in the scheme of things

    the thing is if you're in it for the short-haul - how do you know you won't yo-yo.. find the path that means that you will stay at your successful point, continually modifying your body but at the level you're happy at .. and work out the effort you will have to put in to keep at it

    because if you don't plan for the rest of your life, you're just on another diet .. and not a lifestyle change

    well that's what worked for my psyche anyway .. there is no 'I've got there' there's just I'm 3 months into maintenance how can I tweak it now to work better and better ...

    Hope that brain dump makes sense
  • meghanduprey
    meghanduprey Posts: 158 Member
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    rabbitjb wrote: »
    meghanduprey wrote: »
    rabbitjb wrote: »
    meghanduprey wrote: »
    what is wrong with me? it's like i have a subconscious desire to undermine my weightloss efforts. i got down to 172.5 and all of a sudden i feel like i can eat whatever i want or i "deserve" to eat extra all the time even though i know i'm going over my calories. i weighed myself this morning and i'm back up to 174 which isn't a huge increase, but it's an INCREASE. i don't know why i self sabotage like this all the time.

    focus on working out what you're going to do in maintenance

    what do you mean?

    Because at the moment I imagine you are thinking "when I lose this weight"

    Whereas really you should be thinking "What do I need to do to maintain this weight loss once it's gone"

    I spent a lot of my time whilst I was losing weight thinking about how I would manage my maintenance, rapidly coming to the conclusion that I wouldn't stop logging and actually an extra 250 calories a day (because I was on 0.5lb per week for a long time towards the end) isn't really that much.

    Then I found trendweight.com that gives me a chance to track fluctuations and a trendline (so do happyscale and Libra apps and lots more) .. so that I could see when exercise, sodium, hormones made my scale weight go up but really what that meant in the scheme of things

    the thing is if you're in it for the short-haul - how do you know you won't yo-yo.. find the path that means that you will stay at your successful point, continually modifying your body but at the level you're happy at .. and work out the effort you will have to put in to keep at it

    because if you don't plan for the rest of your life, you're just on another diet .. and not a lifestyle change

    well that's what worked for my psyche anyway .. there is no 'I've got there' there's just I'm 3 months into maintenance how can I tweak it now to work better and better ...

    Hope that brain dump makes sense

    i am trying to think about this as a lifestyle and not a diet, that's why i try to not 'outlaw' foods and instead try to fit them in (like pizza and cookies) because i don't think i could live long term without them, so why would i want to try to live short term without them? i would just end up resenting everything and binging (more than i already am that is).
    sometimes it's overwhelming to think that writing everything down is going to be a lifetime endeavor other times it doesn't bother me at all. sometimes working out is fun and i can't wait for class and other times i have to slog through it. i'm sure that's all normal. i just need to learn to stick with everything kind of like a marriage between me and MFP.
  • whmscll
    whmscll Posts: 2,254 Member
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    ArkMom35 wrote: »
    I don't know what to do about it, but I'm right there with you. I lost 50 lbs and now just want to eat all the time. I'm over exercise, I'm over counting calories, and I just don't seem to care. I'll have a few good days, and then blow it. It's like I've lost the heart to continue. On the bright side, I'm very happy with my 50 lb loss. However, I still want to lose at least another 30. I'm not sure if a break would help at all, but as much as I want to eat, I really really don't want to gain that weight back. I'm just trying to muddle through it until I can get re-inspired.

    Yep. This is what happened to me and why I am here today. I would say eat at maintenance for a week or two and then get back on the wagon.

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