Anyone else have trouble eating healthy when your S/O does not?
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shannonbrown0421
Posts: 47 Member
My husband doesn't have the desire to improve his eating habits so every meal is a big ordeal lol and I hate to admit but a lot of times I just give in and eat what he eats to avoid arguing. Anyone else in a similar situation?
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No... We eat the same things, I just eat less. He eats more because he is bulking.0
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Sometimes on the weekend my DH will order pizza and I use a napkin to dab the grease off. As far as dinner goes my DH has been going through what I thought was a "phase" but it has turned out to be a way of life for him but it works for me. We have 4 children and I prepare dinner and I make myself something I prefer to eat. Then me and the kids eat and Dh continues to drink beer and play computer games, then binge eats later in the evening. This is sad for me to watch but he has always been a thin guy and I am weighing in less than him now. He did freak out the other day when the fattening mayo was all gone and he had to use my low fat mayo lol!! I guess eating low fat is just as painful as eating the fattening stuff. I do find on the weekends when we have a campfire with the kids I I have a hard time turning down the smores my little people make for me. I will be looking in to some low fat alternatives for those yummies too!!0
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kinda of, my wife and I are both losing weight and getting into better shape, but we've taken different approaches. I've decided to eat healthier and a more balance diet (less calories of course) and my wife is doing this herbalife stuff her sister go her into. Breakfast and lunches aren't bad because i'm at work and pack those myself. dinner on the other hand is 2 very different meals or it is just me and the kids eating because all she is having is a shake.0
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I was in the beginning.. Then slowly but surely he was the one that told me to exercise and cut back.. then he got on my band wagon..He started exercising and we started planning meals together and I started cooking a lot healthier and he actually lost 30 pounds since December 2014...
I told him to stop blowing his fat loss on me... I think it is contagious..
BTW he does not log his food... what's up with that?0 -
I like what randomtail said. I don't do well trying to eat all healthy foods. I'm better off eating what I want, just not as much as I want.0
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I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.0 -
I do the cooking so she doesn't have much of a choice unless she goes out and picks up her own food. I have only been cooking healthy meals for the last year now. There were some issues at the beginning but it is routine now.
My problem tends to come when we go out. (We have crazy jobs so we tend to go out two, or three, or four times a week.) My strategy is just to leave most of my calories for the end of the day, order the healthier menu items at our favorite places, and throw half of the meal away...0 -
Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it0 -
shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it
whats wrong with meat loaf, potatoes, corn, and rolls?
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My husband and I don't have similar diet goals, but when one of us cooks something, the other eats it too. So my healthier, veggie dishes he eats more of or snacks a little more later, while his traditional Southern approach to cooking make me eat smaller portions or budget my lunch/snacks to fit his meals. But don't underestimate how much your success will make an impact- I am now lighter and more physically fit than my husband and he has begun to add more exercise to his life as he noticed my awesomeness
Good luck! 0 -
shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it
What's wrong with meatloaf, potatoes, corn and rolls? Also there are options at pretty much every restaurant.0 -
Capt_Apollo wrote: »shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it
whats wrong with meat loaf, potatoes, corn, and rolls?
it's just a lot of food and when i pick at it i feel bad because he thinks i don't like it but i'm just trying to not eat so much0 -
shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Capt_Apollo wrote: »shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it
whats wrong with meat loaf, potatoes, corn, and rolls?
it's just a lot of food and when i pick at it i feel bad because he thinks i don't like it but i'm just trying to not eat so much
Still not following how it's "a lot of food". Just make a smaller plate. Me thinks you need to reevaluate your relationship with food.0 -
shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it
Meatloaf, potatoes, corn, rolls, fast food - all yummy - and all can be worked into your goals. Why would something go to waste when you can save half the portion for lunch/another day? "Just a salad" doesn't mean it's "healthy". If he's the one cooking most of the time, I would have some quick veggies (or something you consider healthier) I can whip up and add to whatever he's making. You don't have to throw whatever he's making in the garbage. You can work with it. Just like you can work with restaurants and fast food. It can be done. Don't get down on yourself, just do it.0 -
shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Capt_Apollo wrote: »shannonbrown0421 wrote: »Jackie0Marie wrote: »I'm confused as to what argument can have with him regarding what YOU'LL eat. If he doesn't want to "improve his eating habits" then he can eat what he wants, he's a big boy. However, you can eat what YOU want.
My husband isn't trying to drop weight like I am, we eat together, and most of the time (90% of the time because I love to cook) I am the one preparing meals, but that doesn't mean I drop my eating habits or throw portion control out the window. He can be picky - he's all for southern food, meat and potatoes, pasta, etc (which I LOVE and some may say are "unhealthy") and I still make all that food, but I don't over do it when I eat it. Watch your portions or modify a meal FOR YOU. Instead of something you may consider unhealthy that he enjoys - why not make that for him and something you want that's a better option for you? Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I'm sure it's annoying to your husband if (not saying you are doing this, but an example) you want to shove a bunch of kale down his throat when he didn't make the same choice you did. You changing your eating habits can even be intimidating for him, maybe he thinks you want to change him or any change in general can be scary for some (especially food since it can be so comforting). You can still enjoy the same foods, but you can do so sensibly - don't go overboard, fit those "unhealthy" foods into your calories/macros. If your hubs isn't interested in your health kick, that's fine, he doesn't have to be it's about YOU not him.
Don't blame someone else for "giving in" unless they are literally force feeding you.
Good luck.
I guess what I mean is he for example he will make meatloaf, poatotoes, corn, rolls for dinner and I will barely eat any of it or just want a salad and then I feel bad because he made all that food and I let it go to waste. Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes if it's something he was really wanting. Idk my own fault I guess lol just wondering how others deal with it
whats wrong with meat loaf, potatoes, corn, and rolls?
it's just a lot of food and when i pick at it i feel bad because he thinks i don't like it but i'm just trying to not eat so much
look, i know what you mean. it's a big tray of food. and you have no self control. i get it. i'm the same way with most certain foods. best thing to do is to serve yourself half of what you are actually going to have. that way you can go for "seconds" and you still have your meal. also, before you eat, put the stuff in containers for leftovers.
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Maybe he is trying to tell you he likes you the way you are! He wants a little meat with his taters I know what you mean too.. I have had these same issues in the past my husband tried guilt me the same way. Once I have my mind made up to take care of me, I let him know it's nothing personal and I am taking care of me he needs to learn to understand that. If he can't then maybe he needs to explain why. Make sure you let him know what he makes tastes good your just calorie counting and that's what works for you. 0
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Yes! It's so hard when my OH is sat there eating a whole pack of hobnobs... plus he's really slim which is irritating!0
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My wife has been pretty supportive. She does not eat a lot of junk food or want it in the house. However, she has let our teenager, PS1, take over the cooking (14 yo with a gas stove and oven, what could possibly go wrong?). He does like some richer or starchier foods, but fortunately he does like good vegetables also (though not all of them). I am just getting better at weighing out portions and opting out of eating the carb-laden foods (pasta, couscous, etc.) And yes, I actually set a smaller plate for myself.
That said, we tend to run out by the weekend so we tend to go out then. PS2 really likes the fast food places, but fortunately PS1 now feels he is above them. I have been eating smaller portions or putting less on my plate if we bring home carry out. Also, I am trying to plan ahead to leave myself a bigger calorie allowance.
@shannonbrown0421 do you do any of the cooking? Maybe, like others, you should cook healthier stuff when you have the chance.0 -
not really, i mean it is tempting sometimes when my boyfriend is eating all his yummy treats. but~ he also eats dairy & redmeat and i do not. and he's trying to gain weight, while i am not. and i know he's different and likes different things to eat. but i do try to get him to eat more veggies & fruit in general and encourage healthier eating habits that will improve his overall health. but i never push it on him, only make suggestions which he accepts most the time! and we try to make our own meals to how we like, or go out to a place that has something we both want.
but actually the sweetest thing he will do is if he wants something and i want something different (and i'm in a picky mood) he will drive to three different food locations to get me whatever item i want off of each menu LOL
ive just learned to leave him be about his food, as he leaves me be. we give each other suggestions but nothing pushy or we start getting pouty haha0 -
For fast food, I will almost always just order from the kids menu. The portions are about right for an adult. Example: Cheeseburger happy meal with coke = 510 calories. I usually opt for diet coke or water though, which is 410 calories for the meal. Plus you get a toy!... Or if we decide on fast food and he wants somewhere that doesn't have healthy options I will just say yes ...
Just because you eat fast food doesn't mean you have to get a double cheeseburger, large fries & large coke. You can still portion control and stay within your goals.0
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