Lost weight and now struggling - looking for friends that understand

ArkMom35

I've lost 56 lbs and am stuck in a rut. It's my own doing, I've become complacent as I'm happy to be where I am size-wise because it's been a long-time since I've been here. I have at least 25 lbs left that I'd like to lose though, I just can't seem to get motivated to continue. I'm having a real issue accepting that I should be losing weight at a slower rate. I change my settings daily because I don't know where to be. I want to lose as fast as I was before, but I want to eat like a horse. I find myself doing really well for a few days, and then over-eating for a few days. I'm just all kinds of messed up. If anyone understands and wants to be friends I'd love to see how others are handling the struggle to continue, especially at a one pound a week rate of loss. Also open to any helpful suggestions for overcoming this rut. Thanks

Coryn2109

I am in the exact same spot right now. I as you need help because I don't know what to do and feel like I've lost motivation.

tigerblue

You probably will not be able to safely lose at the same fast rate as you get closer to your goal. It is better to slow down to 1/2- 1 lb a week.

Check out the group "not-so-heavy girls". It is mostly people who are close to goal, or even at a healthy weight but trying to get leaner.

Scarlett_ptista

Hey there! I am not quite in the same boat as you, but I would be happy to lend some support! I'm just starting my second round on MFP, and really getting serious about losing this time. I log daily, and have an open dairy, you're welcome to add me

As far as your issue, I am sorry to say that adjusting your settings all the time probably is pretty counterproductive. It's been said time and time again, but you did not gain weight overnight, so you know you'll not lose it that way, either!

Have you calculated your TDEE? Probably the first step would be doing so, and adjusting (and leaving!) your MFP settings for caloric intake there. Remember, you need at least a 500 calorie deficit daily to lose 1 lb a week - which at the amount you want to lose is probably reasonable - so don't be discouraged, but binging and "cheating" is not going to help. Not saying you can't allow cheat days, but you need to be aware of how they're effecting your overall goals weekly.

I find that working out is the biggest help when it comes to meeting calorie goals, I know a lot of MFP users would rather just lower calorie intake, but it definitely provides a little more wiggle room.

Lastly, you lost 56 lbs! That is AWESOME, and you should be so proud of yourself! That is a huge inspiration to me, so don't beat yourself up. You've done a great job, and you're going to be fine.

mimil55

Hi! Congratulations on losing the 56 lbs, that's a really great effort.
I've often had the same problem of reaching a plateau or getting easily sidetracked too, and it's so frustrating.

At the moment what's working for me is that I've tried to make long term little changes to my lifestyle, instead of dieting or cutting things out completely. I tried not eating chocolate or chips previously, and I always crack, so now I think it's better to just have those things in moderation and very occasionally.

Some ideas for little changes: drinking tea and coffee without sugar, trying to break a sweat most days even if it's only for 20 minutes, eating more fruit and veges, making lunch the main meal of the day etc.
There's an interesting list of tips by Bob Harper here, some of which I don't necessarily think are useful but might work for you - http://content.randomhouse.com/assets/9780345533135/view.php?id=skin001

Another thing that helped me was not using the excuse of "I don't have time to do any exercise". It was just a question of looking at my priorities.
I bought an exercise bike and I bike in front of the news or a TV show, which I would have been previously watching from the couch.
My husband and I go for a long walk around the block after dinner a couple of nights a week, instead of spending time on the internet or watching TV.

The only other thing I could say is try to be patient, and set a goal that's not too hard to reach. Better to leave your MFP settings at a slow rate of weight loss over a period of 2-3 months, than to set the weight loss goal too high and get discouraged. If you make some lifestyle changes, and make sure you're getting a calorie deficit each day (and don't worry too much if once or twice you go over!), you will reach your goal over time.

Good luck and I wish you all the best with it. Congratulations again on how far you've already come

ArkMom35

tigerblue wrote: »

You probably will not be able to safely lose at the same fast rate as you get closer to your goal. It is better to slow down to 1/2- 1 lb a week.

Check out the group "not-so-heavy girls". It is mostly people who are close to goal, or even at a healthy weight but trying to get leaner.

Thank you for the suggestion, I will have to try and find that group

ArkMom35

Coryn2109 wrote: »

I am in the exact same spot right now. I as you need help because I don't know what to do and feel like I've lost motivation.

I guess all we can do is not give up until we get our mojo back!

ArkMom35

Scarlett_ptista wrote: »

Hey there! I am not quite in the same boat as you, but I would be happy to lend some support! I'm just starting my second round on MFP, and really getting serious about losing this time. I log daily, and have an open dairy, you're welcome to add me

As far as your issue, I am sorry to say that adjusting your settings all the time probably is pretty counterproductive. It's been said time and time again, but you did not gain weight overnight, so you know you'll not lose it that way, either!

Have you calculated your TDEE? Probably the first step would be doing so, and adjusting (and leaving!) your MFP settings for caloric intake there. Remember, you need at least a 500 calorie deficit daily to lose 1 lb a week - which at the amount you want to lose is probably reasonable - so don't be discouraged, but binging and "cheating" is not going to help. Not saying you can't allow cheat days, but you need to be aware of how they're effecting your overall goals weekly.

I find that working out is the biggest help when it comes to meeting calorie goals, I know a lot of MFP users would rather just lower calorie intake, but it definitely provides a little more wiggle room.

Lastly, you lost 56 lbs! That is AWESOME, and you should be so proud of yourself! That is a huge inspiration to me, so don't beat yourself up. You've done a great job, and you're going to be fine.

Thank you! I haven't really figured out how to calculate my TDEE. I guess I get confused because of the amount of energy expended in exercise tends to go up with each level...I workout about an hour a day, but it's not vigorous, so I'm never quite sure what to select on the TDEE calculator.

ArkMom35

mimil55 wrote: »

Hi! Congratulations on losing the 56 lbs, that's a really great effort.
I've often had the same problem of reaching a plateau or getting easily sidetracked too, and it's so frustrating.

At the moment what's working for me is that I've tried to make long term little changes to my lifestyle, instead of dieting or cutting things out completely. I tried not eating chocolate or chips previously, and I always crack, so now I think it's better to just have those things in moderation and very occasionally.

Some ideas for little changes: drinking tea and coffee without sugar, trying to break a sweat most days even if it's only for 20 minutes, eating more fruit and veges, making lunch the main meal of the day etc.
There's an interesting list of tips by Bob Harper here, some of which I don't necessarily think are useful but might work for you - http://content.randomhouse.com/assets/9780345533135/view.php?id=skin001

Another thing that helped me was not using the excuse of "I don't have time to do any exercise". It was just a question of looking at my priorities.
I bought an exercise bike and I bike in front of the news or a TV show, which I would have been previously watching from the couch.
My husband and I go for a long walk around the block after dinner a couple of nights a week, instead of spending time on the internet or watching TV.

The only other thing I could say is try to be patient, and set a goal that's not too hard to reach. Better to leave your MFP settings at a slow rate of weight loss over a period of 2-3 months, than to set the weight loss goal too high and get discouraged. If you make some lifestyle changes, and make sure you're getting a calorie deficit each day (and don't worry too much if once or twice you go over!), you will reach your goal over time.

Good luck and I wish you all the best with it. Congratulations again on how far you've already come

Thank you. I agree, I need to learn some patience and leave my settings alone. I could definitely try to eat a bit healthier so maybe I'll work on adding some better more-filling food choices instead of all my snacks. I'll check out the link too.

browme02

Congratulations on your progress!! I recently broke through a plateau that was just breaking me mentally! I was sick of feeling deprived/and I could feel myself starting the old habits again, as even after "good days" the scale wasn't moving.

For me, I needed to revisit my motivation for setting my original goal. Would I be happy with staying at my plateau weight? My answer was that as happy as I was to have made the progress I had, there was more work to be done. I could celebrate, but not with food. My motivation has been to improve my health, look better, feel better, and feel like a part of something. I didn't want to feel isolated or like I couldn't participate in things that looked like fun. Participation was the biggest one for me, since health can be very oblique and it's hard to know how much better you are looking. Reminding myself that my plateau is temporary was important--I was either going to keep losing, or start gaining again, and I got to choose which one.

Next, I needed to shake things up. The same things that were making the pounds fall off months ago were having no effect, and like you, I'd find myself eating everything in sight some days! I was bored and my body didn't understand why my experiment couldn't just be over. Things that helped were: visiting the websites of reputable diet/exercise books and blogs for some new ideas and recipes, and starting to train with weights at the gym. I sought out a trainer, but other people have success with videos, etc. I needed the guidance and extra kick, though. I used to be intimated by these gym Adonises who seemed to know everything about fitness and would make me feel embarrassed about my progress. In my experience though, they are usually kind, annoyingly perky, knowledgeable, non-judgmental people who are thrilled that people are trying to get healthier and that they get to be a part of of it.

Anywho, revisiting my goals and WHY i made them gave me some new life, and adding strength training is what finally brought me past my plateau. Good luck!!!!

sodakat

I looked at your profile and saw that you started 6 months ago, so really a short time to lose 56 pounds.

Are you logging all your foods still? If so, you can figure out your TDEE using this formula:

[Total calories consumed+(Total lbs lost x 3500)]/# of days =TDEE

My suggestion is to change your weight loss rate goal to 1/2 pound a week for a while. That would be TDEE minus 250 calories.

You'll have to be very exact with logging with that small a deficit in order to lose, but the extra calories will probably help a lot!

Deputymax

You have described my situation to a T. I've lost 58 lbs (46 with the help of MFP) with 22 more to go and have gotten off track because I started feeling complacent. I could use a little shove to get going again. Add me and maybe we could help each other over the finish line.

gothicfires

I think you need to decide what you want. Do you want to be a healthy weight or do you want to eat whatever you want whenever you want. Do you want to see being healthy as a chore or something that makes you feel good. I'm currently eating 1200 calories a day. With the food I've decided to eat, It takes me around half an hour. That is by my design. I eat 4oz of protein, 1/2 cup of rice and 2/3 cup of veggies. I eat my veggies frozen and either with my fingers or just a few pieces at a time. My 10 inch plate starts out full and eating becomes work. Three hours later I get to do it again. Now I do realize that being on disability, I can adapt my hours to what ever I need. But I doubt eating what I eat a little faster if I had to would be that much of a difference. I am never hungry.

I want to be able to move easier and hurt less more than I want that slice of pizza. I want to be able to look in the mirror and say 'there's me!' with happiness and not just mere acceptance.

What do you want?

feel free to add me as a friend if you'd like, you won't hurt my feelings if you don't.

melholmes80

Congrats on loosing so mug already! I'm in exactly the same boat...30lbs lost with 30lbs still left to get to goal. I've been in a plateau for the past 2 weeks. I'm happy to support and motivate each other along the way. Feel free to add me.