Feel like giving up but won't!!!

jorinya
jorinya Posts: 933 Member
edited November 19 in Motivation and Support
Hi MFP, right now I'm fed up. I'm sick over a week now and doctors still don't have any idea what is wrong with me. Everything has been ruled out so far. Nothing showed up in blood test, urine test or abdominal and pelvis scan. Back from yet another hospital trip and feel like crap. Back in tomorrow for more tests and a ct scan and whatever other test they can do. Its a bit scary that this all came to light since I started losing weight. What if I hadn't made that decision would it have been worse? Only God knows.

Christmas 2014 I spend most of my time lying on the couch watching everyone enjoy themselves. I went to the doctor and nothing showed up. This continued through January, February and into March. In January 2015 I weighed 95kg or 209lbs but that didn't cause me to change my eating habits. I started to feel sick, skipped a meal here a meal there but didn't change what I ate. I did change one thing, I became a little more active and started walking more around the estate.
Oh I should mention that I'm living in Nigeria before I continue. I'm originally from the Emerald Isle that is Ireland and married to a wonderful Nigerian man for 14 years and have 4 wonderful children (3 boys aged 13, 11 and 8, and a little girl who is 3). I moved here because of his job and love it. Sometimes I don't, like now because there are a group of people arguing not far from my window and t sounds like they are right beside me. But you get that everywhere!!!

Dad's birthday, 25th of March 2015, I started Cambridge Weight Plan weighing in on day 1 as 91kg or 200lbs. From that day to this I have lost 13kg or 29lbs. Before I got sick I was 78kg or 171lbs. I haven't stepped on the scales because I know there will be water weight because of the antibiotics and other medicine I have taken. Today was my last day on antibiotics.
Last year I had typhoid and had damage done to my stomach and this year also, 2 weeks into my journey I had a mild attack. The scan today revealed the damage to my stomach has been repaired. At least that is one worry cancelled. Scan also ruled out lots of other problems too so that some other worries cancelled too. Back in for review, ct scan and every other test that can be done. When I came home today I burst into tears and said that I give up. I felt deflated. I'm so close to reaching my target weight and now this happens.

But you know what? I'm not going to give up. I'm not going to let someone or something steal my joy. In my country we say:
Is fearr an tsláinte na ná táinte ...........Which in English means: your health is better than your wealth.
I have made a decision today to continue on this journey that I have started and will reach my target weight. I will not let illness or anything stop me from becoming the wife, mother and woman that I am meant to be. I am strong, tough, determined and hardworking and I will get through this. I will become healthier, happier and fitter. I will beat this and beat my enemy called obesity. My BMI is 30 so technically speaking I am now overweight and no longer obese. I have succeeded this far and I will complete this journey.

I posted this thread not for help or advise, trust me I'm getting a lot of help from my wonderful MFP family and also from my husband, his family and my amazing team of doctors. I posted this so that someone out there who feels like giving up, who feels like throwing in the towel, will see my story and be inspired and motivated to strive on and continue on their journey to becoming happier, healthier and fitter. Please add me if you are feeling like quitting. I promise you if I can get through this then you can get through this. Don't quit.
If you feel like quitting don't, you are strong, you are powerful, you are beautiful/handsome, you are a fighter, you are a warrior, you are a champion. You got this!!!!!!!

Love to my MFP family,


Joanne xxx

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