Lost weight, gained it all back. Please help.

kaosvarkas

Hi All,

I previously used this site and it helped me lost over 100 pounds to get down to 130. I have no regained all my weight in just over a year and am back at 230. I am feeling some major depression and discouragement from this. Does anyone have any stories or words of wisdom they can share? It would really be greatly appreciated. I feel highly disappointed in myself and honestly kimnd of in disbelief.

Thanks

seska422

About 80-95% of people who lose weight gain it all back. That doesn't mean that you can't lose it and keep it off, but it does take perseverance.

The problem is that people go back to eating the way they used to eat before they lost the weight. If you do that, you will regain the weight every time.

A lifestyle change is needed. I know that, if I want to keep the weight off, I'm going to need to track what I eat for the rest of my life. I've lost over 100 pounds twice (before I found MFP) and now I'm on my third go-around. The difference this time is that I don't have a goal or end-point. I'm eating what I want to eat, just less of it, and tracking my intake.

It's pretty hard to lose weight. It's much harder to keep it off after you've lost it.

Don't give up! You can do it!

schellerica

Idk if this helps but I too, am in a similar situation. In 2011 I lost 35 lbs & have now gained it back + some. For a long time I ignored that it was creeping back up on me and got comfortable with my unhealthy habits. Now I am back where I started; disgusted with how I look. I finally decided enough is enough. I was depressed about being fat and too embarrassed to go out with friends, so I'd console myself with a bag of chips. Smart thinking right? The most important part is making the decision that you've had enough and want to get healthy again. It's not too late! Just do it! Like you did before. It's possible! It's going to be tough but it'll be worth it in the end and you're not alone

dramaqueen45

You showed that you did it before so you know you can do it again. I read an article the other day stating that diet is more important to losing weight, but exercise is more important when maintaining. If you haven't already- find an exercise that you love and will stick with for the long term. And I agree with above- what you eat has to be a permanent change and when you go into maintenance it is about continuing to track calories but just more of them. Good luck- you can do this.

SezxyStef

Losing weight is one thing...maintaining is another.

You know how to lose so do that again but learn how to maintain.

mart001

I hear this story so much. That is why I am not going anywhere even though I have reached my goal last Sept. To many people think once you reach your goal, it is all over, but it is not. You just can not go back to old habits.After all the work I did to lose 130 pounds, I will not let myself have to go thru trying to lose that much again. Now I give myself 5 pounds to play with and that is it, so things do not get out of hand. I remember how miserable I felt before I started, and not feeling that way again is my motivation.....

Fit_Quest

I can completely relate as it seems like after a weight gain (of a prior loss), you go through some sort of emotional stages (maybe like stages of grief?) It takes some time to come to terms with where you are at again. And then mustering up the motivation to start that weight loss journey can seem almost impossible.

But here are a few things that I had to come to terms with...
- I don't have a choice but to deal with the weight because if I'm not watching what I eat, I am gaining and it really will not stop. It took me an additional 40 lbs to realize that, accept it, and own it.
- I also realized that my weight is a life long journey and as frustrating and difficult as it is to lose weight, the journey can be empowering and hopeful if you celebrate the small successes.
- The other thing I vow to tell myself and remind myself once I lose weight is to never again let my eating run away from me completely.

Hope this helps because it has taken me so long to get ready for another round in the weight loss ring!

ElJefeChief

It's about a change in thinking and lifestyle, not about going on a diet.

pineapple_jojo

I am in the same boat, lost 38lbs, gained 32lbs back in the last year. It *is* depressing and disappointing and I am frankly amazed at myself. BUT I'm determined to lose it (plus a bit extra because I never did quite reach my goal) and I have a wealth of experience to draw on (though I'm still learning loads of new lessons). I think the main thing is to learn from this re-gain and get down to business again. Like Mart001 said, once you get to goal you gotta keep logging.

Dust yourself off, head up and start again OP - don't dwell on the past, move forward with determination! You CAN do it!!

lowriderjim

I lost 70# on MFP a year ago. I thought I had portion and calories under control so I went off calorie logging. During the next 6+months I gained 30# back. I am back on MFP and have lost the 30+#. I intend to continue on MFP until my body says OK. The important point is that I intend to continue my logging even at a maintenance goal. I've learned my lesson. Good luck.

rjnuss

I too lost almost 30 pounds and gained half of it back in less than 3 months. I go through spurts where I work out like crazy and then I pig out on the couch. I decided to go back to logging everything again and hoping it will get me back to where I want to be. Just stay positive and know you did it before you can do it again. I use MFP to keep me accountable for what I put in my mouth. It really helped me before.

half_moon

Same thing happened to me. Almost 40 pounds bounced back after a friend committed suicide. I didn't care about anything, much less my weight. After I climbed out of my depression, I blinked at the scale in disbelief.

My biggest advice is to shrug it off. Tell yourself -- well, *kitten*. Looks like I'm back on the wagon. Then find an activity you like. For me it was CrossFit. Find something addicting and fun -- what helped me get started was a great community, which then helped me get back into a better lifestyle. Eating healthier gets easier once you've worked out -- don't want the workout to mean nothing! Then keep chugging on. You did it once and can do it again. Your goal should be to BE healthy. Not to be a certain weight. That way, you don't finish the race once you hit your goal.

Second time is a charm!

jennifer_417

One thing that I've learned on this site is that you need an exit strategy. It's great to lose all the weight, but if you don't have a plan to keep it off, you'll go right back to your old ways and regain it all.

I generally see that people do one of 2 things:

1.) Keep a goal weight range in mind, and if they go above the chosen range, then they go back to calorie restricting.
2.) Continue counting calories like they did when they were losing, just eating at maintenance, rather than having a deficit.

Thorbjornn

I was going to start a thread about this but since this is here I'll share.

For reasons I need not go into my diet turned into a train wreck. I had lost 30 lbs in 2012. From then until now I've gone up and down. If you look at the pics on my profile, that was at my best (I'm the guy with the tattoos, not the one with the blond hair or holding the baby goats ). Well, I don't look like that now. That was about 190 lbs, I'm about 227 now. Not only did I never get to my 175 goal, I put back the 30 lbs I lost, plus another 10! So now I'm at square one... worse actually

I let it get away from me for what I can only think of as complacency. My fitness even went down the toilet. I'm out of shape, I get winded, I'm uncomfortable, I have no energy, I sweat just putting on my socks and tying my shoes, and I've gone back up 3 pants sizes. Starting today I'm taking back control. Yes, it's a pain in the *kitten* to log food, but it has to be done. It's when you don't keep track, weigh, measure and exercise portion control is when it all starts spiraling down the drain slowly but surely.

phanatic82

I lost 50lbs on here, but eventually gained back 80. I am so disappointed in myself but I know that just being disappointed wont help. I need to take responsibility and accept what I need to do to change my eating habits. It isnt easy but I am getting there. Feel free to add me as a friend. Sometimes it's easy to be able to talk to people who have been there. You CAN do this!!

rebbylicious

the most common thing I see for that trend is if people are too "balls out" about the change, or "all or nothing" mentality it's impossible to adjust to real life again. That is why portions and moderation are key. You have to allow yourself to do things and have things taht you know you will not be able to stay away from forever but come up with a strategy to either work it off or earn it.

kaosvarkas

Thanks for all of your helpful and encouraging replies everyone. It really has made me realize that it's not over and I can keep going. I started changing some of my eating habits yesterday and also exercised a bit. Slow and steady I guess.

NancMoss

Im in the same boat! I had lost 50some calories was in the same shape of my life. I got to comfortable thinking I was immune to weight gain. .. bull crap Now 2yrs later im at my heaviest.

Depression, unhappy and disgusted by how I look. Im so glad I came to this app. It honestly has the best supporting people.

Thanks to this wonderful support I been able to say no to all the junck, fast food, unhealthy stuff for 9days now. Im excited to keep going.

Feel free to add me. I love encouraging, I love friends. Lets do this together! Dont give up, dont look back.. lets keep moving forward! We got this!

leggup

I've lost and gained weight several times, although this is my first time using MFP to do so (and this is my biggest "loss in one go" - 70 lbs vs in the past I lost and gained 40 lbs).

I've done a lot of research on weight maintenance and I've done a lot of introspection as to why I've failed in the past. For me, it comes down to a few factors.
1. Not Owning A Scale. Studies show that people don't gain back as much weight when they regularly weigh themselves. I didn't own a scale until 3 years ago. Now I know.
2. Using exercise to lose weight. In the past, I didn't change my eating habits (portions) enough- I just ramped my exercise WAY up. It wasn't sustainable when life happened.
3. Being Perfect. I would severely undereat and go all veggie + lean protein to be "perfect" and then fail and overeat.

You'll have to do some soul searching for yourself about how you got to where you are. The good news is that you know what to do to get there; you just need to figure out how to stay there. Most people don't even know how to get there.

BernieMBurke

I'm like a lot of people here. I lost 90 lbs in 2010, but then I lost access to my work gym (moved to a new location without a gym). On top of that my new work location was 50 miles away and this is Washington DC traffic. I got lazy with all the commuting and next thing I knew all 90 lbs were back (damn them lbs - I lost them and they found me). In late February 2015, I had to go the doctor because I fell on some ice. This was a new doctor and she went ballistic about my blood pressure and weight.

That got me back on this site again. To date, I've lost 39 lbs and want to go about 30 more. I realize I will probably have to do this for the rest of my life. Next on my list is to start weight lifting to strengthen myself (recomp, not bulk).

dirtyflirty30

The same happened to me. I lost 85+ pounds with WW, and then put it all back on (and then some). YOU CAN DO THIS. Learn from your mistakes, and realize that you've only given up when you stop trying. Keep going.

punkrockgoth

I'm in the same boat. Same depression. Same frustration. I feel like if only I sucked less at starving myself, I could be so pretty. Ugh. I hope you find some clarity.

lilRicki

I lost 30lbs...gained it all back plus another 10. I finally weighed myself this morning after being in denial. Thank you for posting this thread! I am currently on Pinterest trying to find some yummy and healthy food, and I've already planned to join my old gym.

DanniB423

punkrockgoth wrote: »

I'm in the same boat. Same depression. Same frustration. I feel like if only I sucked less at starving myself, I could be so pretty. Ugh. I hope you find some clarity.

1. I know it is hard to not let weight define you. But you are pretty right now. You may not feel it because you are unhappy inside but I assure you.
2. You do not have to starve yourself. Calorie counting is tedious and sometimes doesn't leave us room for everything we want every single day but if you are truly "starving" you need to reevaluate your goals.

carter1092

It's all about changing your habits. Never give up. It's hard to adjust to a new lifestyle, but once you keep your mind to it, it becomes incredibly easy. For instance, I used to drink soda like it was water, now I hate any type of carbonated beverage because I created this new habit. I use Stevia in place of sugar when I make my morning coffee, buy wheat bread instead of white, meal/protein bars instead of candy bars ... these small changes I made keeps my weight at a manageable level. I recommend reading this book: http://www.amazon.com/Making-Habits-Breaking-Things-Change/dp/0306822628/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1434999360&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=making+habbits,+breaking+habbits I hope it helps you out, and remember, don't let any set-back stop you from your goals!

kaosvarkas

Thanks for all of your suggestions and encouragement guys. I really appreciate it. I have put on another 10 pounds since I made this thread and I am still struggling. For the first time in my life I started having pain in my legs just from walking top the point where I felt like I needed to stop. This scares me a lot. I need to make a change now. I just worry it might be too late.

treylam

I am now in that same boat, thought I was alone. I lost 42 lbs and have gained all but 10 back, starting over again. UGH!

kicking_horse

Ah the joys.... I am too on the up side working my way back down... I maintained for the longest time, these two thoughts did wonders for me: "you can't out train a bad diet". That one was good. At the time I was training hard and would mentally remind myself to not ruin it with junk after all my hard work. And of course, one always needs a treat. It's important to not deprive yourself! So I made a rating system by grading treats on a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being the highest. If that baked good was so darn tasty that I would call it a 10, then I would eat it. You'll be surprised to discover how many treats you'll rate at less then a 10. Why bust your butt off on something you ate that wasn't completely worth it?

Anyhow, that worked for me!

And if you are wondering why it failed me... Life took a turn, divorce, stress, emotional roller coaster ride etc. Discovered I am an emotional eater. lol. 25 lbs later and voila!

Baby steps! And take it one day at a time. Be proud of yourself and what you know you are capable of! Keep smiling and never look back!

meganjcallaghan

Like people have said, part of the problem for many is that they see the goal weight as the end of the road. Like you "only" have to utilize the tools that MFP or other programs have to offer until you hit that goal and then you've succeeded and the work is done. I hear people say all the time..." I couldn't POSSibly count calories for the rest of my liiiiiiiife!!! What?! are you CRAZY?!!?" As though it's the most difficult thing in the world when it's actually quite simple and not even that time consuming. People I know who will spend hours on a Netflix binge end up looking at me like I've grown a 2nd head if I suggest that keeping a tally of their calories eaten every day might prove more useful than "just trying to eat healthier". Because...you know...that would just take up too much of their time.

Anyhoo the general assumption seems to be that the good habits have gone by the wayside and it's as simple as remembering that you have to keep the habits and look at this as a lifestyle change rather than a diet....but since that's not necessarily what the issue was, I'm curious....WAS it as simple as that? Or was there something else that came along and caused the regain? Can you pinpoint specific events that caused you to go off the rails temporarily? Is there anything that might need to be addressed aside from the making or breaking of basic habits?

chazlevy8390

Exactly the same, lost 2 stone last year and put it all back on and more. I was just in denial and ignored the weight gain and continued stuffing my face. Until I went to put on some trousers that used to fit fine and couldn't even get them past my thighs. I've started going to the gym 3 times a week and eating better. Saying no to greasy take always and chocolate and having some self control! I just remembered how I felt when I was heavy last year and how my ex made me feel about it which caused me to lose it in the first place. I got rid of him straight away FYI. But putting the weight back on has bought it all back and I have little self confidence and feel quite insecure. I hope to lose it again or most of it by the time my holiday comes round in October.

Good luck to you

kaosvarkas

meganjcallaghan wrote: »

Like people have said, part of the problem for many is that they see the goal weight as the end of the road. Like you "only" have to utilize the tools that MFP or other programs have to offer until you hit that goal and then you've succeeded and the work is done. I hear people say all the time..." I couldn't POSSibly count calories for the rest of my liiiiiiiife!!! What?! are you CRAZY?!!?" As though it's the most difficult thing in the world when it's actually quite simple and not even that time consuming. People I know who will spend hours on a Netflix binge end up looking at me like I've grown a 2nd head if I suggest that keeping a tally of their calories eaten every day might prove more useful than "just trying to eat healthier". Because...you know...that would just take up too much of their time.

Anyhoo the general assumption seems to be that the good habits have gone by the wayside and it's as simple as remembering that you have to keep the habits and look at this as a lifestyle change rather than a diet....but since that's not necessarily what the issue was, I'm curious....WAS it as simple as that? Or was there something else that came along and caused the regain? Can you pinpoint specific events that caused you to go off the rails temporarily? Is there anything that might need to be addressed aside from the making or breaking of basic habits?

I struggle with anxiety and depression. When I lost all my weight, it could be argued that I was obsessed to the point of an eating disorder. Then I had a complete breakdown, was all the way down to 120 pounds as a 5'6 Male and for the first time in my life I was uncomfortably skinny. When I went inpatient for my mental issues I ate like it was my job because I was scared of how skinny I was. Its been constant and quick regain since then even though I felt like at a certain point I was no longer trying to regain and I just couldnt stop it. So I kept gaining and I got more depressed which caused me to eat and gain more and faster. It turned into a vicious cycle that I've been struggling to get out of ever since. So here I am now.