Feeling some guilt...

Athijade Posts: 3,259 Member
Today I have decided to stop logging for a period of time and I am having some guilt about that.

The reason for my decision is that I need to start getting some medical conditions under control before I can add back calorie counting. I have Interstitial Cystitis and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. IC is very much based on stress, anxiety, and the foods I eat. CFS is something I am still learning about so I also need time to figure out what will work for me there.

I have recently been trying to add foods back into my diet but seem to have done too much too fast so I am in a huge flare of late. I need to get that back under control so I am not in constant pain day in and day out.

Hopefully I will be able to get back to the counting within a few weeks. I just feel guilty about it because I had been doing so well... but I just can't handle both issues right this moment.

I guess I don't have a question or anything, just needed to get it out. Has anyone dealt with this sort of decision before?


  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    why are you stopping logging?
    work with your drs to see what you need to do for IC. I know CFS can be a struggle to. I sorta think it's related to the body and how it deals with pain.

    anyways. I have behcets and myalgia. I decided to get in better shape and lose weight because it's better for my health and causes less physical stress on my body.
    pain is part of my life and I've accepted that. but I still exercise every day. I do yoga 3x a week at least.
    yoga was my godsend. it helps me live a normal life as it stretches out all the stiff joints and helps me with my pain. I just made working out part of my life and not doing it is not an option. How much I do is the only option I give myself. maybe I only walk a mile or only do five min of yoga. other days, I run 4 miles and do 2.5 hours of yoga. depends on how I feel. but an important part of this is that I have worked with my drs and my symptoms are not as bad as they used to be. when I was first going thru the diagnosing, it was awful.
    if you can't do it. then that's fine too. it's a personal decision. one only you can make for yourself
  • atypicalsmith
    atypicalsmith Posts: 2,742 Member
    You can curtail or add to what you eat and still log the calories.
  • tedioustrainingap
    tedioustrainingap Posts: 78 Member
    You have to do what's right for you and there's no need to feel guilt over that.

    I have cfs and have done for quite a long time. I've just started to exercise my way out of its clutches, through swimming. Last month, I couldn't walk for half a mile without suffering extraordinary consequences. Now, I can swim lengths for 90 mins, five days out of seven and actually feel better than before, afterwards. I'm not 'cured' but I wanted to share that in case it might give you some hope. I've also lost weight, which for me is a happy bonus! Fitness was my priority.

    If logging is just too much at the moment, put it aside until you feel stronger. You said you were doing well? You're still doing well! You'll continue to do well. When life throws us a blinder, we're all entitled to a time out while we process it. I hope you feel better soon :)
  • Athijade
    Athijade Posts: 3,259 Member
    Thanks all for the words, they mean a lot.

    The reason I am not logging during this time is because it is simply adding too much anxiety to my already high levels. Anxiety and stress are also triggers for IC flares. I don't plan on not logging for a long period of time, but only a couple weeks.

    The CFS is just knocking me on my behind. For example, I spent last Saturday at a festival with my family so lots of walking and lots of general energy use. Sunday and Monday I was nearly bed bound. I had horrible joint and muscle pain, exhaustion, foggy thoughts, swollen lymph nodes, and a sore throat. Plus an IC flare. All of those are symptoms of CFS. It was horrible. I was curled up in tears because it was all so bad.

    I am thinking yoga and pilates for my workouts will be a good start.
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    Athijade wrote: »

    I am thinking yoga and pilates for my workouts will be a good start.

    they can be as easy or as strenuous as you need them to be
  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,484 Member
    Taking a break for a few weeks while you get a handle on what is happening to your body is fine.
    As has been said, use what you have learnt and apply portion control instead of counting for the short term.

    If you haven't thought of it- give aqua fit a try. It is low impact and excellent for muscle, joint and mobility problems. That it is lots of fun is just an added benefit.

    Cheers, h.
  • gentlygently
    gentlygently Posts: 752 Member
    A fellow CFS person here - I don't log anymore (I do keep a track of my energy and activity levels tho). I am interested in getting healthy nit slim nowadays...I hope you are getting help with the anxiety - it is so draining, on our faulty body batteries. Try googling 'detached mindfulness' ...? I find it helps.

    I am also swimming myself out of the CFS....the graded excercise approach certainly works for me. And it helps with the calorie burning of course, and stress etc.

    A whole day festival? Wow. I would not even attempt without telling my family I am having an hour lie down under a tree / in the car or whatever mid-day.....I have learnt the hard way to modify my plans and prioritise eeking out/topping up rather than raiding my limited energy store too badly any one day. It is frustrating. But not as frustrating as getting it 'wrong'....

    I hope you find a good balance for you...just go back to logging when it feels right for you. You might want to do it eg thru a symptom tracker app, so you ca gauge yiur energy levels etc?

    Good luck
  • Spreyton22K
    Spreyton22K Posts: 323 Member
    Firstly, let me say I am sorry that you are suffering with these conditions.

    I have Lupus, Central Sensitization (since 1997 @ 35 years old) and a plethora of added in side issues, including CFS. Whilst I cannot know your personal struggles I do have empathy for the extra difficulties that come with chronic illness and pain, it is a daily balancing act of trying to fit in with the expectations of society, work, family etc and often our own desires to go gung-ho to "make up" for the times when we do not have the energy to do "normal" activities.

    If logging is a source of anxiety for you then by all means step away. I notice that you took on a full day out with family and friends and then suffered terribly later.....this is all part of learning where your line in the sand stops. Frustrating as it may be that line can ebb and flow as the illness cycles through it's bad and good times.

    I also wonder whether you are trying too hard.... I felt that my body and mind was something I could twist and bend into whatever I wanted, what I thought 'everybody' had/has or what I "thought" was expected of me. I was my own hardest task-master and was often comparing myself and my performance in relation to others....obviously this is a path to misery.

    Now I am much kinder to myself - I listen more closely to the cues my body is giving me. Stopping before the point of exhaustion and not berating myself that for what I can't do - I am more about finding those things that I CAN do and celebrating those victories.

    I'm not perfect with this either by the way......but mostly, I have stopped making the mistake of pushing myself over the boundary for one activity.... only to suffer for days after....learning to PACE yourself needs to become part of your life.....

    Regular, repeatable and sustainable exercise will help you....it will strengthen you and lessen the overall fatigue.... a diet that is highly nutritious and enjoyable too will support your body/mind....beware of Fad diets and cutting out foods willy-nilly but also be aware that some foods do cause inflammatory responses in susceptible people.

    Whether it be Yoga, Pilates, exploring the effects of diet upon your illness and making appropriate changes, learning to meditate and practice mindfulness (these have helped me tremendously), seeking outside help in the form of counselling or enlisting the help of friends, family or support group - seek the help you need and deserve.

    All the best.