Help with Weekend Dieting

jleeporter

Hello! I was wondering if any seasoned dieting veterans have any advice to impart on an issue I've been having. I feel like I've tried everything and am still stumped. MyFitnessPal, you're my only hope!

So I have been exercising consistently since January and have been very successful with diet and portion control during the week, I've lost 14 lbs and have gained significant muscle mass. I almost have abs! The problem is, I'm about 6-7 lbs away from my target weight, making my adherence to a stringent diet that much more important.

But it all falls apart on the weekends. For starters, I am rarely home on the weekends. My schedule is never consistent because I'm always out and about doing different weekend things. I have no accountability or support group. My friends are all slightly overweight and we are all craft beer enthusiasts.
So the natural progression is:
Saturday - I bring a snack with me to wherever we go, and the first half of the day goes by fairly well. It starts getting late, everyone starts getting hungry. We go to a bar or someplace that has beer, and I say I'm only going to have one, but everyone stays so long that I feel awkward just sitting there while everyone drinks, and order another. And perhaps another. Then, sometimes everyone suggests getting a fourth meal at some fast food place and, being a little tipsy, we then gorge on empty calories that are just going to convert straight to fat. (this has happened more than I'd like to admit!)
Sunday - Sunday breakfast is my one official cheat meal of the week. We look forward to trying different breakfast places around town. I usually always have a gigantic mountain of pancakes or other equivalent carb. Then, feeling defeated by Saturday night and Sunday morning, I throw the notion of my weekend diet out the window and eat whatever. I tell myself "I'll get back on the bandwagon on Monday". But it happens just about every week.

It feels like there's always something; some event that just steamrolls my weekend diet: a backyard bbq, a holiday, a day out with friends, etc. I've tried packing snacks, I've tried going to the restaurants my friends want to go to and then holding back, I've done everything but bring a lunchbox with me where ever I go. Has anyone else had this problem? I don't want to alienate myself from my social group in order to meet my weight loss goals. However, I always feel like a salmon swimming upstream with my friends, and when I need a voice of reason the most I'm always met with overindulgent enabling.

Any advice, tips - anything is appreciated! Thank you so much in advance!
-Jessica

dizzieblondeuk

Why not have water, or a diet soda when everyone is moving onto their 2rd, 3rd, 4th beer? I know you say you love your beers, so it's either restrict yourself to just one, to ensure you're not getting tipsy enough to make terrible food choices, or restrict your calories on the 5 days you are disciplined - enough that you have adequate calories to indulge in a few more beers and food. So, eat under your goal calories Mon-Fri (if you can), and save perhaps 100-150 cals a day to 'give' to your weekend blow outs. That's 500-750 calories to add to your weekend - that should cover most alcohol and high cal foods, I would have thought.

As for your 'cheat' breakfast - yeah, you need to get out of the routine of that indulgence, if your Saturdays are routinely wildly over on calories. Does it have to be a 'gigantic mound' of pancakes? Surely there are other options on the menus? What if you missed breakfast/brunch with your friends once in a while, ate at home, and met them afterwards for a coffee?

Parties etc are just hard to plan for - but I think the solution may lie in considering your calories in a weekly amount, rather than daily one, and looking to achieve that target, rather than blowing it on Saturday and Sunday morning, and just saying 'hang it all' and letting everything slide for the rest of the weekend', with that classic/terrible 'I'll start on Monday' mentality. It's all about discipline though - and about not giving up the moment you slip. Instead, treat each meal as a separate opportunity to meet your goals.

jkwolly

I eat less during the week on some days to have extra calories for the weekend, then I can enjoy some drinks, etc!

Going by a weekly goal helps me more sometimes when I know I have events coming up, etc. Your body isn't a 24 hour clock, so tracking weekly can be really beneficial!

Jruzer

- Have a larger deficit during the week to help compensate
- Move to maintenance on the weekends instead of having "cheat" days
- Add more exercise in to earn more calories
- Switch to lower bodied beers: session IPA, gose, pilsner, etc.
- Pass on your "fourth meal": maybe just have coffee
- Consider further lifestyle changes - you probably can't have full Saturday evenings out AND huge Sunday breakfasts

NEWMEKELLIB

This is so me, at every single level. I feel your pain friend. Im the only one dieting and exercising in my group.. and I always indulge in alcohol on the weekend... I know when I completely stopped drinking I lost most of my weight...then When I started back on the weekend BOOM My weightloss stopped. I know people say save calories through the week for the weekend ...that equation never works for me...I just have to stop because I dont have self control that way. (thats my take)

if you have a "bad day" on saturday... Dont follow it with a " Bad " sunday...

ASKyle

Bank calories during the week to use on the weekends.

Switch from beer to vodka sodas/ whiskey sodas/ shots to save on calories.

Hold yourself accountable for all of this- It is your choice to follow the crowd and eat/drink these things.

Breakfast- Try and get some protein in there. Bacon, eggs, sausage, etc.

Laughter_Girl

The process is so much easier when you have the same discipline 7 days a week. Sure, your routine may change on the weekends, but if you maintain the same level of commitment to your health as you do during the week, you'll certainly reach your goals. You don't have to have multiple beers because your friends are doing it. As previously mentioned, drink water. Or if you want multiple beers, get up early to burn enough calories to enjoy those beers within your calorie range. Focus on enjoying the company of your friends and not worrying so much about the food and drinks. Finally, make healthy choices on the weekends as you would do during the week. When your health becomes your priority, I'm pretty certain you'll have a mental shift that will take place on the weekends too.

One more thing, it sounds like you have a great opportunity to be an inspiration to your friends. If many of them are overweight, love to eat not-so-healthy foods, love to overeat in general, and drink excessively, you could show them how they could enjoy going out without compromising their health. You have the ability to be a leader.

Wishing you the best!

pixiechick8321

For beer, why not do tasters? And mix with 16 oz of water instead of beer pints..
And for "cheat" breakfast just go for something healthier...you can still go out, just cut back on ordering a mound of food.

Honestly, you just have to want it - you are giving yourself excuses and you need to stop.

ahamm002

You may find this interesting:
http://foodpsychology.cornell.edu/op/weightrhythms

jleeporter

Thank you all so much for your input! Very appreciated.

I never expect these Saturday spirals, but since there's a pattern forming I guess I need to make some sacrifices. I think in bringing this up to all of you I'm getting down to the core reasons why I make bad food choices on the weekends. I've had a few experiences in which I tried to go out with friends while not taking part in drinking or eating out, and when it was noticed the spotlight immediately honed in on me, my reasoning was called out, dissected and invalidated, with "what are you trying to lose weight for?" and then "I could never do that I love food too much" or "Jessica's too good to eat with the rest of us" or "what is life if you can't enjoy it" etc etc. Then everyone transitions into talking about food or beer and I'm left feeling like the resident weirdo. That, and the equally relevant fact that I still feel like I'm in the throws of my addition to sugar. I think about carbs waaay too much.

@Jruzer - I do loves myself some Gose. And Kolsh. Thanks for the recommendation (also yay Strongbad!)
@Laughter_Girl - Great points. I think my desire to skirt social criticism is just a scapegoat for my sugar/food addiction. The thought has occurred to me on several occasions just to do away with sunday breakfast and adopt my weekly diet permanently. But - can a person really live like that? I guess I'm talking like a true food addict. And also, funny that you mentioned it, because my three best friends are all exercising now, and two of them are dieting. They still make terrible choices, but they are trying... I was very proud of that.

jkwolly

jleeporter wrote: »

Thank you all so much for your input! Very appreciated.

I never expect these Saturday spirals, but since there's a pattern forming I guess I need to make some sacrifices. I think in bringing this up to all of you I'm getting down to the core reasons why I make bad food choices on the weekends. I've had a few experiences in which I tried to go out with friends while not taking part in drinking or eating out, and when it was noticed the spotlight immediately honed in on me, my reasoning was called out, dissected and invalidated, with "what are you trying to lose weight for?" and then "I could never do that I love food too much" or "Jessica's too good to eat with the rest of us" or "what is life if you can't enjoy it" etc etc. Then everyone transitions into talking about food or beer and I'm left feeling like the resident weirdo.

You'll always get those comments, just have to learn to smile and nod!

Nothing wrong with partaking with friends, just try and make it fit and then you won't feel like you're depriving yourself either, right?

FoxyLifter

jleeporter wrote: »

Thank you all so much for your input! Very appreciated.

I never expect these Saturday spirals, but since there's a pattern forming I guess I need to make some sacrifices. I think in bringing this up to all of you I'm getting down to the core reasons why I make bad food choices on the weekends. I've had a few experiences in which I tried to go out with friends while not taking part in drinking or eating out, and when it was noticed the spotlight immediately honed in on me, my reasoning was called out, dissected and invalidated, with "what are you trying to lose weight for?" and then "I could never do that I love food too much" or "Jessica's too good to eat with the rest of us" or "what is life if you can't enjoy it" etc etc. Then everyone transitions into talking about food or beer and I'm left feeling like the resident weirdo. That, and the equally relevant fact that I still feel like I'm in the throws of my addition to sugar. I think about carbs waaay too much.

@Jruzer - I do loves myself some Gose. And Kolsh. Thanks for the recommendation (also yay Strongbad!)
@Laughter_Girl - Great points. I think my desire to skirt social criticism is just a scapegoat for my sugar/food addiction. The thought has occurred to me on several occasions just to do away with sunday breakfast and adopt my weekly diet permanently. But - can a person really live like that? I guess I'm talking like a true food addict. And also, funny that you mentioned it, because my three best friends are all exercising now, and two of them are dieting. They still make terrible choices, but they are trying... I was very proud of that.

Wow, they sound more like frienemies than friends. It is a little awkward to hear these comments, but if this is something you really want you need to learn when to say no. Maybe talk about your success or your goals. Or just have a snappy comeback. But I agree with the idea of banking calories. Maybe go for a long Saturday run before the festivities begin. Maybe if they knew you just worked out, you could more easily turn down that third beer. "Guys, I don't want to undo all of my hard work!" And alternate between water and beer. I order both at the same time so it's not as obvious.

Jruzer

ahamm002 wrote: »

You may find this interesting:
http://foodpsychology.cornell.edu/op/weightrhythms

This is a good read and should be more widely viewed.

cblack8

Yeah, it's always awkward explaining to friends why you aren't drinking and eating as much as usual. For drinking, sometimes I say I'm not feeling great (saying "my stomach is feeling a little off" works well), sometimes I say I have to drive later, sometimes I blame the beer and say I'm a little dizzy and need a break. I've even been known to refill my beer bottle with water or ask the bartender to put my water in the same glass as the mixed drinks.

Either way, you've gotten great advice on this thread, working out more on those days definitely helps. As far as motivation, maybe force yourself to earn the pancakes and if you didn't eat as well as you hoped on Saturday get an omelette instead.

Unknown

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Justthisgirl1994

Order one beer, but also order water and keep getting that refilled. If you're only taking occasional sips from the beer it'll last longer. Do you have to wait until everyone else wants to go to leave the bar? If it's a big group, then leaving after a hour or so shouldn't be a big deal, especially if you spent the whole day with them. As for the drunk munchies, learn to say no. Ppl always tell me how amazing it is that I pass on pizza, McDonald's etc even when I'm blackout drunk. So it is possible to control yourself when you're drunk if you want to badly enough. Your Sunday morning tradition is pretty sad. It's probably setting your progress back by quite a bit. Do you really need a mountain of pancakes every week?