My anniversary bad meal

dltaylorii

(Sorry in advance for the length, but I'm kind of a rebel.)

My wife and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary this past Friday. Living in Charleston, there are some amazing, super nice, wear-a-sports-coat, empty-your-wallet, type restaurants downtown. But we decided to go to one of my wife's favorite places, this little hole-in-the-wall, semi-nice fondue place. To make things better, I had a restaurant.com gift certificate that I had bought forever ago ($25 off - Ballin' on a budget), and hadn't used it since fondue isn't exactly the healthiest of places to dine out.

After taking our little girl to her friends for a sleepover, we were off.

Note, that over the course of the past five months or so, I have had very little (if any) cheese, chocolate or fried. It's easy to see that I was kinda looking forward to a one night getaway where I would try to sensibly combine all three of these delicious devils into one dining experience.

Fast forward to the restaurant. We order our meals... I get the chicken, wife gets the veggies... both of which will soon be dipped into tempura batter and turned into deep fried goodness.

All entrees come with the fondue cheese appetizer, and after about fifteen minutes of beer warming up in front of us, the waiter drops in the cheese, garlic, and other ingredients that are combined into this yummy plop of gooey greatness. However, he notices that the cheese isn't really melting that well, but thinks it's due to putting in too much beer (like that's a thing!). His solution... add moar cheese! Not only did he add the entire bowl (something he said he had never had to do before), he went and got second bowl where he added some of that. After another ten or so minutes, we were dipping broccoli and apples into the world's cheesiest cheese fondues ever and wondering if we would ever be able to poo again.

On to the main course where our oil is now on the hot plate. When the appropriate time passes, our waiter brings out the batter, sauces, chicken and veggies. He then tells us to sprinkle a little tempura batter in and when it sizzles, then we have a green light. Fifteen minutes later, our waiter makes his first appearance back to the table to discover that we still have zero sizzle. Plays with the nob, says to give it a few more minutes. A few more minutes... nothing. So, he asks us if we mind moving tables, which is fine. So, we grab all of stuff, bowls, plates, semi-hot oil, chicken, veggies, sauces, batter, etc and move to the table beside us, where we are now minutes away from enjoying our dinner. Or so we thought...

Time keeps passing, but still no sizzle. Table two is no better! So... what is the logical thing to do? Break down our table and replace the burner right then and there, over our food and while we are enjoying our very special romantic ten year anniversary dinner. At this point, we're just laughing at the burner situation and that that there's a screaming baby at a nearby table where the parents think an occasional shhhh will be the deal breaker to calm it down. Seriously, the baby screamed for a good 25-30 minutes before it finally either fell asleep or lost it's voice.

But we're pretty easy to get along with people, understand that these things happen, and roll with it knowing that we're so very close to enjoying our yummy deep fried dinners that we've already invested so much time into. Plus, through the chaos of table switching, burner replacing and screaming baby, I get to keep looking at my wife, grabbing her hands, and tell her happy anniversary in a deep voice all romantical like... to which we both just crack up laughing at.

Well, after lots more time passes, another few waiter visits, and still no sizzle... we decide to call it. We decide that dinner just is not going to happen. No tempura chicken and veggies. No chocolate fondue drizzled over cherries and bananas. We tell the waiter that we're just going to go, and he says to give him one minute and he'd be right back.

After him speaking with his manager, they decided that "since we didn't eat the meal, they weren't going to charge us for that"... how thoughtful, right? That they would "only" charge us for the cheese appetizer. You know, the one that originally came with the entrees. Not really being one to argue (especially on such a special night), and incredibly ready to just get out of there, I say fine and hand him my card.

The bowl of semi melted cheese cost us two hours of our time, cheese grease dripped on my favorite shirt, and $21 plus tip (which we left, because we're not jerk bags who don't leave tips). The craziest part of the whole thing is that he never used our $25 off certificate thing since the total bill had to be $35 or more, meaning that we actually paid more for the cheese, than we would have if we had eaten the entire meal. Plus, they kept the certificate... but that's fine because I don't see a return trip any time in the near future.

All in all, while the dinner sucked, we got a great story out of it. Plus, I ended up saving a good number of the calories I was planning on eating. We'll at least always remember that time we went and almost got fondue on our 10 year anniversary.

PSA: If you have a screaming baby in a restaurant, take the child outside. All jokes aside, it's rude as hell. I have a kid, so this isn't some "uppity reaction" from someone who hasn't "experienced" it. Be thoughtful of others, and just go outside until they calm down. Sometimes the change of scenery is all they need.

TL;DNR: I got nothing, read or don't... up to you.

notworthstalking

At least you both had fun. With the baby, that's where breast feeding is great. Always quiets a screaming whether they are hungry or not ll

akp4Him

Too funny! Glad you were able to see the humor in the situation. I have 7 children and I agree...if your child is screaming in a restaurant...take the child to the bathroom or outside.

Joreanasaurous

I wish more people had your attitude. Seems like you and the wife had quite an interesting night, glad you didn't let any of the bad ruin it for you

angieroo2

hah! you weren't meant to eat terribly even when you tried.

At least it sounds like you had a good time anyway.

RHSheetz

Thanks for the good Laugh, you have a good turn of Phrase.

You were just not meant to go off plan, though the resturant owner should have comped your whole meal and given you something so you came back again. Not your fault they could not get the oil up to temp. Of course, maybe it was your wife's fault, maybe she did not want you eating all that fried goodness... Just Kidding!

Great attitude. Hope you had a good anniversary anyway.

micqs

I LOVE fondue. Started off at the Melting Pot. But they are extremely expensive. So my fiance was like, that cant be too hard to make. We bought a fondue pot and have been happy ever since! We've never battered anything before fondueing it. Fiance makes a lovely broth that mimics the Melting Pots Mojo mixture. Dump our veggies in the pot, then get to dipping shrimp, steak, and chicken.

Im glad you guys were able to laugh it off. I'm a little more emotional than that and probably wouldve gotten pissed and just walked out without paying. Ive done it once. Went to a Chinese buffet. Was eating happily and chomping away on some broccoli when all of a sudden, I feel a strange texture in my mouth. I spit it out and there was a cricket in my food!!!!!!! I immediately became sick. We notified the waitress who was like shrug, no big deal. I pushed my plate away went to the bathroom and threw up. I know a little melodramatic but it made me sick (I am a HUGE texture eater). The manager came over and was like "oh, 5% off meal". I was unhappy and thought that was ridiculous. So we just walked out. So way to keep your cool! I know silly burners are much different than bugs but my hat is off to you sir!

momzeeee

Wow, that was some anniversary dinner lol! You have a really good attitude about it, if that had been my husband and I, the whole manager part would have gone down much differently :explode: :laugh:

dltaylorii

Went to a Chinese buffet. Was eating happily and chomping away on some broccoli when all of a sudden, I feel a strange texture in my mouth. I spit it out and there was a cricket in my food!!!!!!! I immediately became sick. We notified the waitress who was like shrug, no big deal. I pushed my plate away went to the bathroom and threw up. I know a little melodramatic but it made me sick (I am a HUGE texture eater). The manager came over and was like "oh, 5% off meal". I was unhappy and thought that was ridiculous. So we just walked out.

That's amazing. And usually you have to pay extra for crickets. I've heard they're delicious.

dltaylorii

hah! you weren't meant to eat terribly even when you tried.

At least it sounds like you had a good time anyway.

I know, right. And we did. We got a couples massage the next day that was fan-friggin-tastic. And then spent all day on our friends boat with their family. Great weekend, all around.

5ftnFun

:laugh:

We celebrated our 30th last Tuesday. We were surprised to find that our favorite restaurant had closed, and had been since February. I guess we don't get out much. :laugh: But after reading your story, I don't feel so bad. Sounds like you had a nice time anyway, so happy anniversary.

dltaylorii

:laugh:

We celebrated our 30th last Tuesday. We were surprised to find that our favorite restaurant had closed, and had been since February. I guess we don't get out much. :laugh: But after reading your story, I don't feel so bad. Sounds like you had a nice time anyway, so happy anniversary.

Thanks. And 30th... that's awesome. Congrats.