Am I Alone in This??

HeatherCanDoIt

I have lost 86lbs and physically I feel fantastic. I am so much healthier and I can run around with my kids. I have moved from a size 22 pants to a size 12. That is all great and I am so proud of all I have accomplished. BUT........

I am more self conscious than I have ever been before and I am more ashamed of my body than I was when I was at almost 300 lbs. I am so much harder on myself now, If I over eat or don't go to the gym, I feel guilty and feel like I need to punish myself. I am not sure if it because I didn't care about what I looked like and didn't pay attention to food or exercise before and now it is all I think about. I have to wonder why I feel so bad about myself right now, why my belly jiggle and my big arms are such an issue to me right now when they are so much smaller than they were. I really hope that my mind catches up with my body soon!

I am not sure if this is something that is normal on a weight loss journey or if I am alone in feeling like this.

aippolito1

I wouldn't say it's normal, but it happens... you just need to work through it in your mind and get your head around it. I don't think there's much anyone else can do for you, other than maybe give some encouraging words from their own experience & journey, which unfortunately, I cannot. Good luck, hon. You look great!

bariachic

Oh hun, don't get down on yourself! You've done something most of us only hope to accomplish!! Keep in mind how far you've come, and don't be so hard on yourself.

LittleMissAngi

I feel the same!

KatieM7

Maybe you just need some time to adjust to the changes that are going on in your body. You should give yourself some time to adjust to it. Try not to be too hard on yourself you have accomplished quite a bit! :flowerforyou: Great job by the way!

ErinGiam

First off, you look fabulous!! So don't be so hard on yourself all of the time! On days when I don't go to the gym I do feel guilty but I just tell myself : tomorrow work even harder!
Enjoy your new body !!!

JStarnes

You're not alone. Your mind will catch up. :flowerforyou: Try looking at before/during pictures of yourself, that'll help you realize how far you've actually come, even if you're not where you want to be YET, you've still come VERY far! Keep on keeping on chicky!

tvgal

You are totally not alone! I think it's because, for me at least, I feel like I have already put forth so much stinking effort I should be toned and thin already! Whereas before I let myself get out of control and therefore my jiggly belly made sense! It's frustrating, but we just can't give up! Because I swear gain just 10 lbs and you will think this version of you is nuts!

Yurippe

I am not sure if it because I didn't care about what I looked like and didn't pay attention to food or exercise before

When I was 260 I didn't feel bad about my appearance because I wasn't do anything to improve it. Now that I'm eating well and working out it's hard to be patient for the results.

Precious_Nissa

With losing weight you have to work on your inner being...you have to work on why you gained to begin with...if you do not focus on your inner while working on your outer, you will be at that slump....You have to realize what got you big before you got big and then work and deal with those issues at hand...you have to love yourself and once you learn to love yourself then size wont matter...I am big...I am working on losing weight, but I love me....I had to come to terms with the insecurities in my life that made me stop loving me at some time in life to where I didnt care about my health anymore.....

Its normal for these feelings when you still have issues that have not been addressed....make it a lifestyle change, not just a weight change.....

you are doing wonderful....yes you will be hard on yourself, and some is normal because of the fear of falling and going back but some is still the other which i mentioned above....

Keep it up though...it'll start working out better.

KLCole

I agree with you 100%. Excellent response!

inkprincess

I am the same way! I hope it doesn't last for the rest of my life! You are not alone!

indybrown

I totally get where you are coming from. I agree with Preciousoohnana in everything she said. I think it's because at a heavier weight, I never focused on losing weight for an extended period of time where I wsa successful and so therefore, wasn't thinking about me and what I was putting in my mouth every day. Well, now that we are dieting or doing a lifestyle change, you take time out of each day to concentrate on YOU and it's a huge part of your life in making food decisions, etc. and so at least for me, it's something that I am having to be tuned in to ALL DAY LONG. Then comes in the guilt or remorse when you eat something wrong or have a bad day and so it's all these emotions and thoughts that are now constantly there and reminding you and so therefore, it's with you all the time.

You have done wonderfully and I agree with the others that your mind WILL catch up.

ican♥and♥iwill

You're like my weight loss twin! I've lost 93 lbs total, went from a size 22 (probably should have been a 24!) and I've just recently fit into a 12...

I KNOW I've changed. I can see the changes and feel them too, and that I'm proud of. I'm so happy with the work and dedication I've put into this.

But, in the same breath, I am so much harder on myself. I critique my body so much more now. My arms are huge, my thighs...oh gosh, don't get me started on my thighs!! It's like I'm still not happy, and I feel like I should be.

I'm hoping this is because I'm not at my ideal weight. But I worry that once I reach my ideal weight, I still won't be satisfied.

*sigh*

So while I have no words of wisdom, I can relate 110%. You are not alone in your thoughts and feelings, and while it's probably not "normal" I don't think it's abnormal either.

1Tammy2luv

I have a friend who was bigger than me at my biggest (245lbs). She lost everything she wanted to lose. There was a time for me( I haven't asked her yet.) when I was not happy with the changes weight loss brought to my skin. I do know that I did get saggy and then tighten up as a cycle when I was doing the biggest part of my losing. My friend not only got lean and her skin did tighten up. She is a bodybuilder now. She used hemmorhoid cream on her jiggly stuff before she put on her workout clothes and used the yucky plastic shorts over them. She drank around a gallon of water throughout the day. Necessary when you work that hard and wear the plastic. She also had a friend that did microdermabrasion treatments on her tummy and thighs. Except for a few tell tale shadows from now tiny stretch marks, you can't tell she was ever big. You do have to go a little under weight to get it all off. But if you keep in touch with your doctor and a trainer, you can do the same thing. My gal pal had no surgery to fix this. Just good old fashioned determination. And really, if it makes you that unhappy, you earned some plastic surgery. Save up and go for it. I don't know you and I respect you enough to say that people around you will generally support that if you feel like you need it. Dont feel bad for not being where you really want to be. I bet you are dreaming better than you let on. If you want a super fit body, go get it. There is nothing wrong with beautiful and healthy.

HeatherCanDoIt

I want to thank everyone for taking the time to read this and respond. I am happy to know that there are people out there that know how I am feeling and it is also good to know that it will get better and I will feel not only healthy but I will also feel good about where I am and how I got there!

jamie31

I have lost 86lbs and physically I feel fantastic. I am so much healthier and I can run around with my kids. I have moved from a size 22 pants to a size 12. That is all great and I am so proud of all I have accomplished. BUT........

I am more self conscious than I have ever been before and I am more ashamed of my body than I was when I was at almost 300 lbs. I am so much harder on myself now, If I over eat or don't go to the gym, I feel guilty and feel like I need to punish myself. I am not sure if it because I didn't care about what I looked like and didn't pay attention to food or exercise before and now it is all I think about. I have to wonder why I feel so bad about myself right now, why my belly jiggle and my big arms are such an issue to me right now when they are so much smaller than they were. I really hope that my mind catches up with my body soon!

I am not sure if this is something that is normal on a weight loss journey or if I am alone in feeling like this.

OMG i feel the exact same way.... i thought maybe i was crazy for feeling like this....

Soon2beskinny73

Since the start of my journey I have lost a total of 78 lbs. and when I look at myself I can see a difference but I still have a long ways to go and it's VERY discouraging at moments. I am still at 344lbs. and still FAT and according to the BMI I am still obese therefore I have gotten into that state of mind where I think that I have not accomplished much.

I agree with the other posters here about you have to figure out what got you to your highest weight. None of us want to be overweight therefore there is a reason why we got to this point. I am still figuring out a lot of why I emotionally eat and each day it gets easier for me but I have a long way to go before I am at my goal weight and also have a long way to go in figuring out why I got this heavy in the first place but the important thing is I am working on it. That is where you have to come to terms with it. Good luck and btw , you look great!!

MzMolly

I too understand how you are feeling. On top of that I also look in the mirror and sometimes I do not see the 64 pounds I have lost, just the 50 more I want to shed. I also fear that if I take any time off of exercising that I will instantly be 64 pounds heaver. I know in my head that is not true but I still feel that way, or if I gain 1/2 a pound I feel like I am back to my starting weight. So no dear you are not in this alone, we are changing in many ways and it is going to take work and time to get our attitudes adjusted!!
Hang in there, you look AMAZING!!! I hope I will look that good soon!!

Wolfena

I totally agree with and feel much the same way. It's been almost 4 years since the majority of my weight has been lost and I STILL feel like I am harder on myself and my body image is much worse than when I was over 200 pounds.... because as you said, I didn't think about it before and now it's a constant daily battle and ALWAYS on my mind (which really kinda sucks) & I am my worse critic when it comes to seeing flaws on myself in the mirror. I feel like what other people see and what I see are two totally different things (and in all reality, they are)

bellinachuchina

I understand, girl As everyone has said, it really does take our minds time to connect with our new image! I'm just now starting to actually believe the number on the scale and my new body.

I also relate about being harder on ourselves! I never gave a crap about what I ate before, so now it's like I'm constantly critiquing myself, but I think that is one of the ways to make this change permanent, to always care. I wake up and as soon as I've gotten the kids settled, I begin thinking about maintaining. I really live and breathe it, to a point where it's becoming a natural habit, and I just hope that it will become a completely subconscious one!

Don't get too extreme on yourself, though, you've done an amazing job and should be so proud!

literaryshots

Way to go with the weight loss. Obviously you have a good handle on the physical side of your change.
Remember though, that once the weight is gone it is still necessary to deal with the issues that caused you to gain the weight in the first place. If you don't truly deal with these issues it will be much harder to keep off the weight. Consider the release of losing both the physical and the mental weight. Wouldn't that be amazing? You are worth the time and effort for empowerment!