Feeling embarrassed weighing food
pianofire
Posts: 15 Member
Like a lot of people at MFP, I weigh or measure out most of my food apart from low calorie veg. I
I don't mind doing this on my own, but I feel kind of silly when I'm about to share a delicious hearty meal with my boyfriend. We only eat together once or twice a week so I don't want to subject him to my rather bland diet - most of the time the food is not exactly unhealthy, but he uses a lot more butter and cheese and serves about double the amount of meat I can allow myself to eat. We've been together for a long time so he knows that I can easily eat him under the table with pride, so I'm a bit embarrassed now that I weigh all of my food.
I always serve him first and I wait until he sits down so he can't see me weighing my food and divvying out a pathetic little amount of rich food onto my plate.
I'm sure he'd only find it endearing or slightly eccentric, but I can't help but feel a little pathetic because I'm not overweight or anything, I just want to lose a few kg!
Does anyone else feel like this?
I don't mind doing this on my own, but I feel kind of silly when I'm about to share a delicious hearty meal with my boyfriend. We only eat together once or twice a week so I don't want to subject him to my rather bland diet - most of the time the food is not exactly unhealthy, but he uses a lot more butter and cheese and serves about double the amount of meat I can allow myself to eat. We've been together for a long time so he knows that I can easily eat him under the table with pride, so I'm a bit embarrassed now that I weigh all of my food.
I always serve him first and I wait until he sits down so he can't see me weighing my food and divvying out a pathetic little amount of rich food onto my plate.
I'm sure he'd only find it endearing or slightly eccentric, but I can't help but feel a little pathetic because I'm not overweight or anything, I just want to lose a few kg!
Does anyone else feel like this?
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Replies
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I think you're right—I think your boyfriend will probably find it endearing. And you're not pathetic in the slightest. In fact, you're taking care of yourself, and many guys find healthiness to be sexy. My hubby teases me about the food scale all the time, it's cute!0
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I don't weigh my meal if my boyfriend cooks. I watch him cook and account for all the oil and butter. I look at the package of meat to see how much the whole thing weighs and assume I'm eating half (and sometimes less as I'm not embarrassed to eat only a portion). I'll suggest a salad, or even if he isn't eating one-I'll make myself one just so I'm filled up along with my smaller portion of whatever he is having.
If we are at my place, I'll slap the stuff on a food scale I guess (though I really don't like cooking for him). It's not like he is standing over me watching every move I make.0 -
My girl is not exactly on board with the whole calorie counting thing (she thinks it leads to anorexia, especially because I also work out every day in some form), so weighing my meal around her is... Well, it leads to tension, to say the least. But just like I still work out around her, I also still weigh my food around her. I am not about to stretch out the weight loss part of my road to fitness just because she has irrational thoughts about it. I just stubbornly weigh my food.0
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The only thing I have to add here is that the food you eat does not have to be bland or boring. There are many delious, savory recipes to work with. In fact, my BF prefers what I cook to what he would be having at his house.0
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My wife and children used to make fun of me too, until I lost all my weight and achieved a nice body. Now my wife is more open to using a scale from time to time. Be yourself, you shouldn't have to hide who you are. How else are you suppose to know exactly what's going on with your diet? The only person that can change you is you0
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Thanks for your support everyone, it's nice to know that others have been in a similar situation.SherryTeach wrote: »The only thing I have to add here is that the food you eat does not have to be bland or boring. There are many delious, savory recipes to work with. In fact, my BF prefers what I cook to what he would be having at his house.
Perhaps bland wasn't the right word, I really should have said rich. I love to cook and I'm pretty well equipped with delicious and healthy Asian and Middle Eastern recipes, it's just when I really feel like something stodgy that I feel I'm lacking flavour.
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He was curious when I first started doing it but he just accepts it even though he doesn't really understand how narrow my allowance is. The only time he's rolled his eyes was when I was digging through a stirfry to separately weigh the meat and that's because I was blocking him from getting to his food. So now, I just serve him first and do whatever I need to do. I figure that I'll be at this for a while and I can't hide it, so I might as fly the flag high!0
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My husband was ambivalent about my weighing food. He bought the scale for me, and at times seemed annoyed with my requests for things like leaving pasta sauce off so I could measure. Then a couple of months ago he finally caved and started weighing his food too. He's now 15 pounds down, and the next time he has to go see the doctor she won't have to threaten to put him on meds to help him lose weight.0
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I get the eye rolls and "obsessive " comments nearly every time my husband sees me weigh my food.
I just block him out... There are worse things I could be doing
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Just do what you want to do. It doesnt matter what others think if what they think is conflicting with personal progress. As soon as it matters, that is when you fail.
I asked the bartender at my local sports bar if they have nutrition facts for the garlic fries. She kind of gave me a look, but she asked the manager and he said no. So, I had to estimate.
I would do that anywhere, and I would weigh food if information was variable (given I am counting). What other people think of me is irrelevant to me, and I couldn't care less. My nutrition is not about them.0 -
I'd draw the line at whipping out my scales in a restaurant or friends/families houses.0
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We have a cafeteria at my workplace and I have requested them to weigh food for me before. Initially, they must have thought me a tight person who wants to know value for money, but after telling them I am on a strict diet, they're okay with it. Six months of this and I have noticed there are a lot of compliments all of a sudden and some of my colleagues have started going to the local gym, too, so I get the last laugh (not that I care).
Here's a suggestion - if you're cooking, weigh the ingredients and serve out actual portions, so for example, if you are making a 'serves 4' meal, dish yourself out one quarter of the food and let everybody else go nuts on what is left in the pot. Weighing or measuring ingredients before cooking is somewhat normal behaviour, I think.
If you're eating out or at somebodies house, well, with some experience and practice, you'll get the hang of visually identifying 'a portion'. Asking somebody to serve you a small amount or asking if you can weigh usually leads to a conversation you're not comfortable with, but that's also called accountability and over time, you should be in a position to show that you were 'right' all along. Stick with it if it's good for you.
Finally, if your boyfriend/family/mother doesn't get it, you can be blunt and tell them it's something you want to do and it hurts nobody. My flatmate used to giggle when she caught me weighing snacks, now she struggles to compliment my achievements because, I guess, pride is hard thing to swallow.
TL;DR - just keep being you.0 -
My husband laughs at my food scale, but I'm not bothered. He thinks I'm a bit mad lol.
When he cooks I just guesstimate though. Usually it's something like a stew, so mainly veggies anyway.
I definitely wouldn't take a food scale to a restaurant or a friend's house.
If you're that worried, why not just do a big workout the day you eat at your boyfriend's? That might offset any extra calories.0 -
My boyfriend is the one who cooks, and was a bit annoyed when I asked him to start weighing the food, but does it on most days now.
Fortunatly a lot of our food is pre packaged, so often I assume I ate half of it. (Which will probably be a slight overestimation, but I'm not too concerned)0 -
My boyfriend bought me my current food scale! I sometimes weight my food when I'm at his place, too, with his postage scale, but I'm pretty good at taking reasonable portions of the more caloric foods we eat together. And we always have 17 million different veggies or fruits, so my plate never looks anemic compared to his.
My roommate probably thinks I'm crazy for weighing each component of a fruit salad as I make it, but I'm not the one who gets drunk alone at 9 in the morning. Hopefully, she'll feel happier soon, and I can be a good influence on her.0 -
FitnessTrainer69 wrote: »My wife and children used to make fun of me too, until I lost all my weight and achieved a nice body. Now my wife is more open to using a scale from time to time. Be yourself, you shouldn't have to hide who you are. How else are you suppose to know exactly what's going on with your diet? The only person that can change you is you
Absolutely this. DH thought I was finally going absolutely nuts and I could tell he was really concerned. Until I lost the weight. And then he was diagnosed with high blood pressure, and now he weighs his food also to track sodium and potassium intake.. Go figure. Just do it. After a few days, he'll be used to it.
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how long have you all been dating? This is such a none issue- I can't possibly understand why you would feel uncomfortable. It's just data.
I mean- I brought a food scale home and just started using it- we don't live together- but he was there before the food scale and barely batted an eye at it when I started using it.
He didn't even care when I took it with me to the damn restaurant. (which I have done more than once)
it's science. So if he gives you *kitten* just say Bro- do you even science- and go back to eating.
such a none issue- it shouldn't even register.0 -
how long have you all been dating? This is such a none issue- I can't possibly understand why you would feel uncomfortable. It's just data.
I mean- I brought a food scale home and just started using it- we don't live together- but he was there before the food scale and barely batted an eye at it when I started using it.
He didn't even care when I took it with me to the damn restaurant. (which I have done more than once)
it's science. So if he gives you *kitten* just say Bro- do you even science- and go back to eating.
such a none issue- it shouldn't even register.
I agree with this. Just curious if you use it when he cooks too?0 -
If you're only trying to lose a few kg, why do you have to eat so little? What's your deficit set to?0
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how long have you all been dating? This is such a none issue- I can't possibly understand why you would feel uncomfortable. It's just data.
I mean- I brought a food scale home and just started using it- we don't live together- but he was there before the food scale and barely batted an eye at it when I started using it.
He didn't even care when I took it with me to the damn restaurant. (which I have done more than once)
it's science. So if he gives you *kitten* just say Bro- do you even science- and go back to eating.
such a none issue- it shouldn't even register.
And all of this0 -
arditarose wrote: »how long have you all been dating? This is such a none issue- I can't possibly understand why you would feel uncomfortable. It's just data.
I mean- I brought a food scale home and just started using it- we don't live together- but he was there before the food scale and barely batted an eye at it when I started using it.
He didn't even care when I took it with me to the damn restaurant. (which I have done more than once)
it's science. So if he gives you *kitten* just say Bro- do you even science- and go back to eating.
such a none issue- it shouldn't even register.
I agree with this. Just curious if you use it when he cooks too?
sometimes- but not while he's cooking. If the man's cooking you a delicious meal- don't get in the way!!!!
And it mostly depends on how well I did during the day- if I didn't do well and I have very few calories left over- I'll use it. If I didn't eat much and I have like several hundred calories to eat left for the day- not usually- we mostly eat meats and veggies so its' an easy "guess"
Now. If he opts to make sweet mashed potatoes-or something like that.... I WILL get the scale out. Carbs- I tend to weigh.
But honestly- I don't weigh ever morsel that goes in my mouth. I'm not actively trying to cut at this point and I can maintain my weight pretty well with eyeballing.
We go to pack up left overs- I weigh the left overs to evenly distribute them.0 -
Off topic but have you farted in front of him yet? If so, the weighing thing is trivial.Like a lot of people at MFP, I weigh or measure out most of my food apart from low calorie veg. I
I don't mind doing this on my own, but I feel kind of silly when I'm about to share a delicious hearty meal with my boyfriend. We only eat together once or twice a week so I don't want to subject him to my rather bland diet - most of the time the food is not exactly unhealthy, but he uses a lot more butter and cheese and serves about double the amount of meat I can allow myself to eat. We've been together for a long time so he knows that I can easily eat him under the table with pride, so I'm a bit embarrassed now that I weigh all of my food.
I always serve him first and I wait until he sits down so he can't see me weighing my food and divvying out a pathetic little amount of rich food onto my plate.
I'm sure he'd only find it endearing or slightly eccentric, but I can't help but feel a little pathetic because I'm not overweight or anything, I just want to lose a few kg!
Does anyone else feel like this?
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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Off topic but have you farted in front of him yet? If so, the weighing thing is trivial.Like a lot of people at MFP, I weigh or measure out most of my food apart from low calorie veg. I
I don't mind doing this on my own, but I feel kind of silly when I'm about to share a delicious hearty meal with my boyfriend. We only eat together once or twice a week so I don't want to subject him to my rather bland diet - most of the time the food is not exactly unhealthy, but he uses a lot more butter and cheese and serves about double the amount of meat I can allow myself to eat. We've been together for a long time so he knows that I can easily eat him under the table with pride, so I'm a bit embarrassed now that I weigh all of my food.
I always serve him first and I wait until he sits down so he can't see me weighing my food and divvying out a pathetic little amount of rich food onto my plate.
I'm sure he'd only find it endearing or slightly eccentric, but I can't help but feel a little pathetic because I'm not overweight or anything, I just want to lose a few kg!
Does anyone else feel like this?
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
valid.0 -
Off topic but have you farted in front of him yet? If so, the weighing thing is trivial.Like a lot of people at MFP, I weigh or measure out most of my food apart from low calorie veg. I
I don't mind doing this on my own, but I feel kind of silly when I'm about to share a delicious hearty meal with my boyfriend. We only eat together once or twice a week so I don't want to subject him to my rather bland diet - most of the time the food is not exactly unhealthy, but he uses a lot more butter and cheese and serves about double the amount of meat I can allow myself to eat. We've been together for a long time so he knows that I can easily eat him under the table with pride, so I'm a bit embarrassed now that I weigh all of my food.
I always serve him first and I wait until he sits down so he can't see me weighing my food and divvying out a pathetic little amount of rich food onto my plate.
I'm sure he'd only find it endearing or slightly eccentric, but I can't help but feel a little pathetic because I'm not overweight or anything, I just want to lose a few kg!
Does anyone else feel like this?
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Let 'em fly. If they walk, it wasn't meant to be.0 -
I hate when my bf weighs food, but that's only because he takes so long with it. Most of the time, I will have weighed and started eating by the time he's putting the food on the scale. Seriously considering getting a His and Hers set.
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Off topic but have you farted in front of him yet? If so, the weighing thing is trivial.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Ha so true! It took a little while for my husband to really understand my challenges with my weight (long after we passed the farting mark). But now he's on board with it and willing to put up with my food quirks.0 -
Knowledge is power, and being aware of portion size is one way you take control of your health and fitness. If that's a problem for either of you, there may be underlying matters which also need to be addressed.
Since my instinct is to serve myself a double portion of some foods, I anticipate I will weigh and log my food for as long as I want to remain fit and healthy, and probably as long as I am in control of my food choices.
If I go out to eat, I do my best to estimate portion sizes and log comparables, which works for the occasional meal away from home. I haven't had occasion to put it to the test for more than three or four days at a stretch though.0 -
Faithful_Chosen wrote: »My girl is not exactly on board with the whole calorie counting thing (she thinks it leads to anorexia, especially because I also work out every day in some form), so weighing my meal around her is... Well, it leads to tension, to say the least. But just like I still work out around her, I also still weigh my food around her. I am not about to stretch out the weight loss part of my road to fitness just because she has irrational thoughts about it. I just stubbornly weigh my food.
I went through this issue with my girlfriend when I first started logging all my food. It really bothered her. Now I've been logging 3/4 of a year and she accepts it completely. She knows I'm going to do it, that it makes me feel better, and that I'm getting nice results. She's also been a bit more active for the last few months and dropped close to double the weight it's taken me to lose this whole time. Anyway. ... For the OP, just do your thing and don't worry what he thinks.0 -
Off topic but have you farted in front of him yet? If so, the weighing thing is trivial.Like a lot of people at MFP, I weigh or measure out most of my food apart from low calorie veg. I
I don't mind doing this on my own, but I feel kind of silly when I'm about to share a delicious hearty meal with my boyfriend. We only eat together once or twice a week so I don't want to subject him to my rather bland diet - most of the time the food is not exactly unhealthy, but he uses a lot more butter and cheese and serves about double the amount of meat I can allow myself to eat. We've been together for a long time so he knows that I can easily eat him under the table with pride, so I'm a bit embarrassed now that I weigh all of my food.
I always serve him first and I wait until he sits down so he can't see me weighing my food and divvying out a pathetic little amount of rich food onto my plate.
I'm sure he'd only find it endearing or slightly eccentric, but I can't help but feel a little pathetic because I'm not overweight or anything, I just want to lose a few kg!
Does anyone else feel like this?
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Huh, maybe it's because we're to the point where we just say "I'm sorry Shaun" instead of bothering with an "excuse me". I do remember the days when I utterly REFUSED to drop a deuce at his place though.0 -
My mom is horrofied at me weighing food ,but my problem is getting enough of it, so she understands, with my friends well... I haven't gone out with them since I've started weighing it... nor do we really go out since they eat meat and I don't... hmm
For the girlfriend part...well I have none ,and when I do, she's not gonna mind cos she's also gonna be fit and stuff. I hope lol0
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