Anybody here a Childless Step Mom or dating a person with ki

megedell

This is the main trigger for me. I have a bad day b/c of this crazy situation (whatever THAT may be) and I eat out of anger for comfort/ control and it's crazy.

Hit me up if you are in the same boat!

cindyangotti

ME! I do have one child of my own but with a man with 3. It is very hard. Very. Very. Hard.

tabbydog

I have no kids of my own and am married to a man with two sons. They live with us full time. I feel your pain! I never wanted any kids, and now I live with two. I have been with them since they were little, and now they are teenagers. Some days I just don't want to come home. :grumble:

skygoddess86

On the flip side. I am the mom and he is the step and it is hard. I get so defensive when he comments on things or gives his opinions. Blended families are the hardest thing you can do.

TruSunshine

I can definitely relate!! It's hard:grumble: , but I love the kid as if he were my own (although I dont want any!) :noway: :noway: :noway:

shell1205

I have a child of my own, but I also have a stepson. He is 19 and moved in with us when he graduated high school (about a year ago). Until then, he was coming every weekend. It is very hard to deal with, believe me, I know!! The best thing you could do is take a walk when you need a break... Walk out your frustration and get exercise, too!! Just a suggestion, but I feel your pain, even though things are a little better now that he's older. Good luck!!!

jupilerman

When I met my wife her daughter was 6 yrs old. I had no kids of myself and became a "dad" overnight. I always threated her as she was my kid. Playing, having fun, respect AND dicipline when needed. My intentions where not to "replace" her dad or anything like that. I want to there for her, someone she could count on and someone that would guide her thru life.

Now, 5 years later we are still getting along great, we never had problems. Sometimes I am worried about the teenager years but we will see. We'll deal with it as it comes along.

I have to say: I get kinda confuse me when I hear comments from people in similar situations that go like: "They are his kids" or "It's your kid".

nicolina823

I am childless and am engaged to a man with a 13yr old son. We met when he was 10. 2 years went by awesome we got along and never really had problems. Now the past year has been like pulling teeth. He lives with up 5 out of the 7 days a week and sometimes every other weekend.

Last week we had a huge fight. (child and myself). He just sat there and laughed at me as I was so mad, red faced and my body shook. I have never been that mad in my life. Its gotten a little better. It is so hard to be a step parent to a boy who has a ton of anger isues and a weight problem himself.

I treat him like hes my own son. I love him as if he was mine. I go without to give him things. And he just uses it agains me now and pulls the divorced parent card. I dont want to be the one to dicipline but it seems that his dad likes to shy away from it and says you can take care of the situation when it comes up (because I worked with children in the past). Sometimes though I feel like I'm always the bad person these days.

mandipandi2010

Nicolina dont feel bad girl....You aint alone!

I have no children however we have custody of my Fiance's younger brother and sister. Soooooo ungrateful! I work myself to the HAMBONE!

No respect America!! *Bernie Mac Voice*

mamaDaisyJ

I had 3 years with my stepdaughter before my son came along. We have her full time, she is 6 now. Her mom is kinda... flaky.
I couldn't see my life without her, she is my rock when I'm floating in a sea. Best big sister ever too!
Don't get me wrong, I hear plenty of the expected crap, and its only getting worse as she gets bigger, and more aware.

On the other end, I had a stepmom that raised my brother and I, from 3 to 15 when they got divorced. She didn't have my littlest brother till I was 13. Gave up college to raise someone else's kids. We thought she was our real mom till I was I think 12 (long story). In a way, she was though, cause she was there when it mattered and we needed Mom. She was the best, and I love her everyday and now ya'll gonna make me call her right now~

megedell

I found a support website and I credit it with getting me through most of this blended family stuff. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and the intention toxic behavior from his ex has really taken a toll on us. I just want to get to the point where I feel good enough about myself that I can quit letting the insults and belittling NOT matter!

PS... the site is http://childlessstepmoms.org if you need some women in your same boat!

tabbydog

I am lucky in that my husbands ex wants little or nothing to do with the kids any more than she has to, so she leaves us alone. It is summer now, and they will go there every other week this summer, but during school they just go every other weekend. They leave today to go for thier first week.... :bigsmile:

I have no say in the discipline in the house. The youngest has anger issues. I did tell my husband that the first time he raises his fist at me he will find himself in a choke hold. (he is 14, and so far so good, but I could see it happening). I knew those years of jiu jitsu would come in handy.... Wednesday night I logged on to the computer and found that the oldest one had been surfing porn during the day while he was home. He was pretty embarassed when I said something to him about it at least. (He's soon to be 17) And come to find out the youngest one had been doing the same thing a couple of months ago and my husband caught him, and just never told me about it. I wish they were girls.... all in all we get along okay, but being the only woman I feel like the third wheel all the time..... I am just waiting until they are old enough to move out. Kids are the only thing my husband and I fight about.