Sorry in advance for my Rant

laurenz2501

If you think that paragraph is too long to read, I pity you.

:drinker: I agree!!! "too long"?? Wow!!


Anyway...

both 16 and pregnant and teen mom have helped in lowering the overall percentage of teenage pregnancy in the US.

I'd be interested in seeing the source of this...

tedrickp

To the OP, I agree whole-heartedly. That said, every generation of kids is stupid. It's what being a kid is. There is always some stupid fad, some major social dysfunction, and lackluster parenting exists in all times and places. We can't see it as kids, because kids are stupid, so the best we can do is get the stupid out of our own kids as fast as possible before they move out and have to be accountable for their own stupid, to society and possibly to the law.

This is hogwash and totally disrespectful to youth IMO.

hookilau

Here's something, for what it's worth. As an average 16 yr old dead head (early 80's), I was gifted a beautiful silver anklet that made a lovely tinkly sound when I walked. My step dad saw/heard me wearing it and exclaimed that I was a *kitten* :noway:

He was *extremely nasty and made me feel ashamed and exclaimed that I was just trying to draw attention to myself eliciting more shame :frown: He explained to me that only *kitten* wore bells that jingled when they walked so that men would know who was loose and decent people would know who to stay away from.

It may make a difference to know that both parents are from Trinidad and while I was born there, I was raised here. You can conclude from this that 'yankee' and 'trini' don't see eye to eye on a great deal of things, including what is appropriate for kids.

WTF?

As a mom of 2, a girl 24 and a boy 17, I will say this.

I pick my battles, carefully.

salladeve

This isn't something new, the fight between parents and kids on what is appropriate to wear has been going on for ages, that is just the way of things.

I was 16 in 1968, I remember having a big HUGE fight with my parents because of the outfit I wanted to wear out with my friends. I had two outfits picked out and they argued about both! Both were very stylish I can assure you.

Low slung bell bottom hip hugger jeans with a tube top (no bra)
White leather mini skirt with white knee high "go go" boots and an off the shoulder peasant blouse.

At the time huge purses were also in style, so I dressed in what they approved of, put my bell bottom jeans and tube top in my purse and out the door I went. lol

The moral to this story is that maybe the parents don't know what their kids are wearing.

Anyway, sounds like to are trying to be the best parent you can, keep up the good work. I've always said (about parenting), we do the best we can with what we know at the time.

nope31

Just here to pass out the condoms.

Who wants some?

labeachgirl

I hate how our world puts on shows like "Teen Mom" and "16 and Pregnant" that encourage teen pregnancy, but then they complain about the "teen pregnancy epidemic". So much of the new generation is disrespectful and low class (if they have any class at all). Teen boys and girls are getting pregnant and still out partying. I was 15 when I got pregnant and 16 when I had my oldest and I will tell you what there was no partying for me, I went to school and I worked because I was on my own and new that I had thought I was mature enough to do adult things then I had to be mature enough to take responsibility for my actions, so I did. But these little girls and boys think that they can just keep on partying like they didn't have kids and the most I can do is pray that they realize that their life is no longer their own. I don't know, I am sorry for ranting and raving, I know I sound crazy, but as I get older I see things that I feel aren't going to help future generations prosper, and it just makes me sad and scared for what the future will hold for me and my future generations.

Actually, there's been a big drop in teen pregnancies and researchers have given a nod to these reality shows as being part of the reason. The teens see that having a baby is no game.

Ophidion

Well, the increase in teen pregnancies largely comes from an ignorance of contraception, which I blame on abstinence only sex education. As for parents letting their child wear what they want, why the hell not? Yeah, you may not like it but it's not up to you, is it?

This. Teen pregnancy, although the rates are decreasing overall, is highest in red states that peddle abstinence-only education and make contraceptives nearly impossible to access.

As for clothing, what one person may find trashy, others may not. As long as their genitals/boobs aren't on display for all to gawk at, let them wear what they wish!

QFT

Ophidion

Just here to pass out the condoms.

Who wants some?

gimme gimme!!

toaster6

If you think that paragraph is too long to read, I pity you.

:drinker: I agree!!! "too long"?? Wow!!


Anyway...

both 16 and pregnant and teen mom have helped in lowering the overall percentage of teenage pregnancy in the US.

I'd be interested in seeing the source of this...

Well, teen pregnancy is down according to the CDC.
http://www.cdc.gov/teenpregnancy/aboutteenpreg.htm

And there have been a couple of polls taken that seem to point to shows like Teen Mom help deter teen pregnancies.
http://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Society/2010/1221/A-force-behind-the-lower-teen-birthrate-MTV-s-16-and-Pregnant
^^ That article links to some studies and surveys.

cherryd69

2. Teen pregnancy. I know it's high in the US and it's high in the UK (the highest in Europe) but I'd suggest for different reasons. In the US my bet is that it's high in areas with inadequate sex education and the culture of abstinence (which absolutely, positively doesn't work). In the UK, where sex education is part of the core curriculum, the problem is more down to lack off opportunities for young people and extremely generous welfare benefits for single parents - if you're a fairly uneducated young girl from a disadvantaged background then the quickest way to get your own place and be independent is to get pregnant.

See i was a teen parent, and yes i did get a house, but that was due to overcrowding at my mum & dads house, as for extremely generous welfare... sorry but this made me laugh...

When i had my daughter i had to come out of work for 6 months due to being a c-section, id previously done 2years working for an agency, as we all should know, most agencys dont offer maternity leave and holiday pay (i know i didnt get it 14years ago thats for sure) so i had to claim income support, yes my rent and council tax was payed, but i had to live on £30 a week as i was under 18 and it was then called a 'bridging allowance' £30 per week when you have to feed/clothe yourself and a baby isnt 'generous' its crap and hard going, i was with my daughters father, but we wernt living together. I had to make the decision to move him in, which then resulted in the rent and council tax not being payed and my 'bridging allowance' being stoped. We had to manage on his minimum wage for 6 months until i could return to work.

Unless your dishonest, you get diddly squat.


eta: most parents try and dress their kids respectfully....but after a certain age you have to let them have their own choice. Also, kids arnt stupid, never have been never will be.... i used to go out in jeans and get changed at a mates house into skimpy clothes, even when i was caught a few times this didnt deter me.

MsPudding

See i was a teen parent, and yes i did get a house, but that was due to overcrowding at my mum & dads house, as for extremely generous welfare... sorry but this made me laugh...

When i had my daughter i had to come out of work for 6 months due to being a c-section, id previously done 2years working for an agency, as we all should know, most agencys dont offer maternity leave and holiday pay (i know i didnt get it 14years ago thats for sure) so i had to claim income support, yes my rent and council tax was payed, but i had to live on £30 a week as i was under 18 and it was then called a 'bridging allowance' £30 per week when you have to feed/clothe yourself and a baby isnt 'generous' its crap and hard going, i was with my daughters father, but we wernt living together. I had to make the decision to move him in, which then resulted in the rent and council tax not being payed and my 'bridging allowance' being stoped. We had to manage on his minimum wage for 6 months until i could return to work.

Unless your dishonest, you get diddly squat.

I'm going to have to disagree with you here - it may have been hard when you were a teen mum but look at the facts now.

Below is the results of me inputting details at entitledto.co.uk which is a benefits calculator. I said that I was 18, with one child aged between 2-9 and not working. This is what I would get a week:



£312.87 a week at aged 18 and out of work. If you were being paid £312.87 for a standard 35 hour working week, want to know what your hourly rate of pay would be? £8.94. What's the national minimum wage for an 18 year old? £4.98. It doesn't take a lot to work out the Math on that one does it - you're £3.96 an hour better off at age 18 not working and having a baby than you are getting off your backside and getting a job. In fact, that £8.94 the teen mum is earning on benefits is £2.75 an hour more than adult minimum wage which is £6.19.

I'm sure at this point the Americans have got their eyes out on stalks....

Sorry, but it seems to me that if you've got an unskilled/uneducated teen girl, facing leaving school at 16 for a minimum wage job and having to continue living at home...getting pregnant and being able to rent her own 2-bedroom flat, with more money in her pocket than if she were working would be a pretty attractive option if you didn't know what else you wanted to do with your life.

cherryd69

See i was a teen parent, and yes i did get a house, but that was due to overcrowding at my mum & dads house, as for extremely generous welfare... sorry but this made me laugh...

When i had my daughter i had to come out of work for 6 months due to being a c-section, id previously done 2years working for an agency, as we all should know, most agencys dont offer maternity leave and holiday pay (i know i didnt get it 14years ago thats for sure) so i had to claim income support, yes my rent and council tax was payed, but i had to live on £30 a week as i was under 18 and it was then called a 'bridging allowance' £30 per week when you have to feed/clothe yourself and a baby isnt 'generous' its crap and hard going, i was with my daughters father, but we wernt living together. I had to make the decision to move him in, which then resulted in the rent and council tax not being payed and my 'bridging allowance' being stoped. We had to manage on his minimum wage for 6 months until i could return to work.

Unless your dishonest, you get diddly squat.

I'm going to have to disagree with you here - it may have been hard when you were a teen mum but look at the facts now.

Below is the results of me inputting details at entitledto.co.uk which is a benefits calculator. I said that I was 18, with one child aged between 2-9 and not working. This is what I would get a week:



£312.87 a week at aged 18 and out of work. If you were being paid £312.87 for a standard 35 hour working week, want to know what your hourly rate of pay would be? £8.94. What's the national minimum wage for an 18 year old? £4.98. It doesn't take a lot to work out the Math on that one does it - you're £3.96 an hour better off at age 18 not working and having a baby than you are getting off your backside and getting a job. In fact, that £8.94 the teen mum is earning on benefits is £2.75 an hour more than adult minimum wage which is £6.19.

I'm sure at this point the Americans have got their eyes out on stalks....

Sorry, but it seems to me that if you've got an unskilled/uneducated teen girl, facing leaving school at 16 for a minimum wage job and having to continue living at home...getting pregnant and being able to rent her own 2-bedroom flat, with more money in her pocket than if she were working would be a pretty attractive option if you didn't know what else you wanted to do with your life.

JESUS times have changed, better whip out this coil an crack on with another kid... :drinker:

hookilau

I wonder if anyone considered that the OP seemed 'too long' to read because at least for me, when I heard my parental units start harping on stuff, I tuned them out :smokin: Really though, after the first few sentences, you get the point.

I was also a teen parent, ahem, I say AGAIN, it's wise to choose your battles. :drinker:

djshari

haha I was just saying that people that wear clothes that are too small is my biggest pet peeve. I haven't noticed it more in any certain age group though.

dunlunicor

To the OP, I agree whole-heartedly. That said, every generation of kids is stupid. It's what being a kid is. There is always some stupid fad, some major social dysfunction, and lackluster parenting exists in all times and places. We can't see it as kids, because kids are stupid, so the best we can do is get the stupid out of our own kids as fast as possible before they move out and have to be accountable for their own stupid, to society and possibly to the law.

This is hogwash and totally disrespectful to youth IMO.

Way to miss the point. Teens are suggestible and automatically perceive even the most minor situations - especially social situations - as life and death. That sort of thinking in an adult would be unacceptable and stupid. But what I'm saying is that teens are NOT adults and cannot be judged by adult standards. It doesn't matter what a teen's IQ is, they are going to make stupid decisions (especially concerning appearances and fitting into their social circle) as a natural part of the trial-and-error process of becoming an adult, It's a temporary sort of stupid, if you like, that passes as that life-or-death suggestibility goes away. The second part of my point was that it has always been this way, and that this particular generation is no different from any other.

My new point is that any young person who wants an adult's respect ought to at least be able to demonstrate that they know how pants work. I think that's a pretty fair trade. Honestly, when (not if, mind) I see an adult - say, a thirty-something woman - in pants so tight that the waistband is buried under muffin-top or - for a man of the same age - pants with a full view of whatever is under them, I lose a lot more respect for them than I do for a teen. And just so I don't get accused of sexism, I'd be equally repulsed at muffin-top on a man and sagging pants on a woman. I just haven't encountered those yet.