MFP worked for me....But then.....So what's your story?

ImInTheFoodForLove

So here is my story...in 2012 I weighed 304 lbs, if you care to, you can see "my before" in my profile pic. Then I joined MFP....proceeded to lose 134 pounds by end of 2013. Yup...I reached 170lbs! Size Medium, and 10/12's, down from "tight" 3XL. And then it stopped...Same old story, plateaued, struggled, cried, started over...and over....and over...must have created and deleted 6 MFP accounts during 2014! But I did manage to maintain the loss, (within 5 pounds), thru out the year, and thats saying something! Cause, No excuses here, but let's just say 2014 was not a great year!...The year started with my husband losing his job in January, 2014... and then after 40+yrs of sobriety he became a raging alcoholic, and is still getting drunk, and meaner by the minute every night. (not physically, just an A-hole). The following month my son, and my one true supporter, moved out, (he came back beginning of this year) only to tell me he has become addicted to cocaine!...Then on to month 3...on the morning of March 13, 2014, my dear friend died suddenly and unexpectedly while getting dressed for work, I got the call that afternoon that she was found lying on her bedroom floor, and if she hadn't been alone she probably would have survived, she just turned 50 the week before, ate healthy, and was VERY active/fit, (the coroner decided it was loss of consciousness due to COPD, eventually, with no one to help her, she just stopped breathing)....but thru it all I plugged away and maintained...until 2015...losing my friend, terrified for my son, and wanting to leave my husband all came crashing in...I just didn't care anymore....so I ate...and ate....and ate....I lost total site of why I was doing this, and my main motivation...which is my adorable, 5 yr old Grand-daughter. When I first joined MFP I wrote in my profile that I wanted to set a good example for her, by eating healthy, and being able to "play" and be active with her... but with all these crisis' happening I finally fell apart...Then 2 days ago I stepped on the scale and was 199.6LBS!!! So close to the dreaded 200 mark...I spent the day doing a lot of reflecting and realized that with all the crazy changes in the house she needs me now more than ever!...I have to be healthy, I have to be around to guide her. Give her happy memories in the midst of all the craziness....and most importantly...just be there....be there when she has questions, and don't understand why "Pappy is never home"..or why "Pappy doesn't play with me anymore"...so....today, like so many, I am starting over....I chose that pic for my profile picture because it was taken in the summer of 2013 when I reached "onederland"...it is the only picture i have that is closest to 199.6LBS that I weigh today ...wish me luck! Life is still crazy in this house, my son is struggling with his cocaine addiction, my husband will most likely be a drunken brute again tonight, and I think about wanting to call my friend everyday, but I can't, and if I could she'd say exactly what she said when he first started drinking. "Beth Ann, he has already stolen years of your life, don't let him, or anyone else, steal how you spend whats left of it"! I hear ya Sheri, behave up there!

jaqcan

You sound like a beautiful person! Good luck on your journey! You know what to do, so do it! Me too, right?!

T1DCarnivoreRunner

You are in a good position since you have lost before and know how to do it... welcome again.

socioseguro

Big Hug to you.
You are a courageous woman. I wish you all the best. Always remember you are doing this for your grandkid
God bless you

HealthWoke0ish

Welcome to the club. This is the right place to be. Our struggles are different, but I can relate a bit with the stress of an uncertain home-life. Anyway, if you need support, like I said...this is the place to be. Good luck to us all!