My pals have abandoned me?

janicecoomes
janicecoomes Posts: 8 Member
in Introduce Yourself
I have lost 72 pounds and it has taken me 16 months to do it. I still have a long way to go. I hated exercise!! Then I discovered the pool. I love the water. So I bust my butt water jogging every single day. burning anywhere from 600 to 1200 calories a day, actually have started to see muscle development---and most of my Pals drop me??? What happened?

Replies

  • tallvesl99
    tallvesl99 Posts: 231 Member
    are most of your "pals" overweight and not doing anything about it? if so, they are probably feeling uneasy at your success...maybe a bit jealous....time to find some healthy friends! Of course, you could just "ask" your pals! ;)
  • Crystalagain22
    Crystalagain22 Posts: 63 Member
    Sorry to hear that hon :( Maybe they are a bit jealous of your success?! Not great friends if that's the case :( Regardless, that is an AMAZING loss!!! Congrats on the dedication!!!
  • 37434958
    37434958 Posts: 457 Member
    Aw I'm sorry about that. Must feel sad, right? Don't worry about it, if they don't like what you are doing, then find better friends. But if you like them and don't want to lose them, then you can talk to them about it and ask them WHY they dropped you, which I don't really advice you to do.

    Add me though, =) Would love to support ya!
  • sophiek1964
    sophiek1964 Posts: 79 Member
    They might not have dropped you but are dropping MyFitnessPal. I wouldn't take it personally. Sounds like a good opportunity to make some new swimming-loving friends on here.
  • genofreek
    genofreek Posts: 75
    Who knows, people have different reasons. Maybe they left the site or trimmed their friends list down to a manageable size and you got lost in the shuffle. Or maybe there was drama we don't know about. No way to know unless you ask, I suppose.

    Great job on the weight loss, though! 16 months and 72 pounds is pretty damn impressive.
  • xxangelwingsxx
    xxangelwingsxx Posts: 11
    hey im sorry to hear your pals dropped you if you'd like a friend for support ill do what i can =]. p.s great progress its very impressive 72 pounds is no easy feat.
  • Time4NUME
    Time4NUME Posts: 137 Member
    Wow. So sorry to hear you keep pushing....:flowerforyou:
  • toaster6
    toaster6 Posts: 703 Member
    Do you mean in real life? It may just be different interests now, if that's the case.
  • stacetherainbow
    stacetherainbow Posts: 131
    I'd agree that envy is the cause. I was feeling rather annoyed with my bestie talking about her diet and exercise all the time. Then one day it hit me... I was jealous.
    Right then and there I decided she wasn't getting skinny without me!
    Congratulations on sticking to your goals. I wish you continued success.
    There are many people out there looking to cultivate healthy, uplifting relationships. If you keep a great attitude, they'll seek you out. And who knows, maybe some of your friends will also have an 'ah ha' moment and come around
  • betterthanbefpre
    betterthanbefpre Posts: 168 Member
    You're doing great. They are just jealous. You will find some supportive friends.
  • No_Finish_Line
    No_Finish_Line Posts: 3,661 Member
    i'm not much of a talker... from what i see, most people get what they give tho, were you very supportive of your friends?
  • J2mazou
    J2mazou Posts: 13 Member
    Wow, your weight loss is incredible. You should be very proud of yourself!
    If your friends aren't proud and pleased for you, then they obviously have their own insecurities to deal with. You should focus on your own happiness, and making new, supportive friends.
  • Barbieg428
    Barbieg428 Posts: 18 Member
    you are doing AWESOME and should be so proud of yourself !!! You are a great inspiration! would be honored to add you as a friend
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
    I remember when I started to get back in shape a year ago and was taking care of my mom. She would constantly sabotage me and we fought about it. Since she is now on the other side of the country I realize she was trying to stop me because she didn't want to be the only one who was out of shape.

    I have a lot of friends that as I become more active and start to do stuff all they want to do is hit the bar and drink/eat crap. We just don't have as much in common as I thought we did. I'm currently taking applications for new friends lol.
  • Buddhasmiracle
    Buddhasmiracle Posts: 925 Member
    Fantastic accomplishment on your part. Sometimes having weight issues is the glue that helps friends stick together. Although it is unspoken they may feel that you are or will "abandon" them with your success. They may even be "rejecting" you before you "reject" them. I personally am not so quick to leave deep and long friendships without first determining "what's up?"
  • allifantastical
    allifantastical Posts: 946 Member
    I'm so sorry that happened. I say it could be jealousy. Feel free to add me if you like. I love seeing people kick butt! It keeps me motivated.
  • luckyshilling
    luckyshilling Posts: 229
    Congrats on your success!
    So sorry to hear your friends let you down.
    If real life pals, maybe talk to them about it.
    If MFP friends, I say not worth it just replace them, so many fish in the MFP sea.:wink:
  • 135OHK
    135OHK Posts: 33 Member
    I've had several my fitness pals drop out on me. I just figure they didn't want to do this anymore. Right now I only have one that is posting daily and one that is logging in, but not really posting comments at this time. It can get discouraging at times, but I'm in this for ME. As long as one other person is encouraging me, that's fine. If she drops out I will just search for more my fitness pals. There are lots of people on here who will be encouraging!
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Maybe you have grown apart. Maybe you have different interests now? I mean you can go the jealousy route and say "screw them", and have less friends. Or you could do your little swims with maybe new friends who like to swim, and then just have coffee with your old friends and go for froyo with them. IDK. To me I'd do whatever to keep as many friends as possible. I wouldn't expect everyone in my life to be ready for change right at the exact moment I am.
  • _Countryboy_
    _Countryboy_ Posts: 71
    16 months? Many of them probably died of old age.
  • earvizu92
    earvizu92 Posts: 320 Member
    Feel free to add me I log in everyday!! :flowerforyou:
  • sharan_v_garry
    sharan_v_garry Posts: 23 Member
    Wow that is some success story. Congrats to you. I am just starting I have been on board three wekls and have lost 7 pounds. I did not realize how many calories, carbs and fats and salt I was taking in, until I started this program. I am 100 pounds over weight so I have a long way to go. You are an inspiration to me. Exercise was the hardest for me. I have asthma in addition to being over weight. So my first lesson in exercise was to be more active. I start with doing gardening. walking to the garbage dump and doing at least 20 minuites of cleaning activities daily to get my arms and legs going. I now go to the gym in my apartment complex and work the treadmill and stationary bike that moves arms as well as legs. I live in Texas where it is very hot so out doors is hard on me. We do have a pool and I will follow your lead and try some water aerobics. Best wishes Sharan G.
  • Tiffa0909
    Tiffa0909 Posts: 191 Member
    Congratulations on the 70 pounds , is not you is them .
  • maybeazure
    maybeazure Posts: 301 Member
    16 months? Many of them probably died of old age.


    How rude. 16 months is a very reasonable and healthy time period to lose 72 pounds. Feel free to add me too, OP, if you are looking for new friends. And congrats on being able to stick with it.
  • QueensGirl83
    QueensGirl83 Posts: 54 Member
    Congrats on losing the 70 lbs. I think that is fantastic and I wish to be there one day, so you are an inspiration. As far as the friends go, it all depends on the situation really. I have lost lots of weight in the past and haven't had many jealousy/friends abandoning me problems. I think the key is to let them do them and you do you. Probably not a great idea to talk about your diet and exercise all the time (that is the reason we come on here for!) who wants to constantly talk about that?
  • Peachy1962
    Peachy1962 Posts: 269 Member
    Maybe not all is lost when you get to goal and they see how well your doing maybe they will be inspired by you instead of feeling threatened which is what I bet it was!! Some ppl can't deal with another's success very well but TRUE friends will be Proud of You! As proud as all of us that's on this site and rootin for you all the way!! :) Good luck and all the best! xxxx Sharon xxxx

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