Different folks, different strokes

jenmckane86

My husband and I have finally decided to challenge ourselves to lose weight and gain overall fitness, and I just have to laugh at some of our conversations. My husband has always been more "fit" than myself. I kind of assumed that because of this he would be really knowledgeable as far as knowing the basics of how to lose weight. At least, more knowledgeable than me....and not so naive. We had a great conversation last night-

Me: "I'm going to the gym in the morning."

Hubs: "What are you going to do there?"

Me: "Probably legs."

Hubs: "What do you mean, probably legs? What does that even mean? What are you going to do as far as working out."

Me: "....um...work out my legs. Squats. Lunges...you know, things like that."

Hubs: "Oh...so you want to look like man?"

...Really!? I thought he was kidding at first. But he was serious! I also discovered that he thinks the only way to lose weight is by doing a gazillion miles of running...and you can also eat whatever you want in whatever quantities you want. I feel like there is a bit of a role reversal going on here, lol...typically men don't think this way. Or do they? We got into a disagreement about our views, and he suggested we make a friendly competition out of it. I instantly agreed!

Watch...he's probably going to drop a ton of weight really quickly and then think he's right.

dubird

Men and women do lose weight differently, so yeah, that's probably what will happen! But then again, not every technique will work for everyone. Some people do fine without exercise, some need the exercise. Some people just work on portion control, some feel the need to cut out certain things. You gotta find what works for you, as long as it's healthy.

And let him know that squats and lunges will make your butt look fantastic. See if still thinks it's a bad idea! XD

jenmckane86

dubird wrote: »

Men and women do lose weight differently, so yeah, that's probably what will happen! But then again, not every technique will work for everyone. Some people do fine without exercise, some need the exercise. Some people just work on portion control, some feel the need to cut out certain things. You gotta find what works for you, as long as it's healthy.

And let him know that squats and lunges will make your butt look fantastic. See if still thinks it's a bad idea! XD

So true! That was pretty much the point I was trying to make to him...I tried eating whatever I want, and I ran all the time! It's not helping me!!! We weighed ourselves this morning and he had already lost 3 pounds to my zero. The man will never know the struggle! lol.

rsclause

I was doing well with a deficit but when I found out I can eat more if I exercise more, I went Turbo. I added running until I was at 25 to thirty miles a week and added Nautilus and planks. Well the weight fell off fast. If you ask me it takes both for maximum loss.

dubird

jenmckane86 wrote: »

dubird wrote: »

Men and women do lose weight differently, so yeah, that's probably what will happen! But then again, not every technique will work for everyone. Some people do fine without exercise, some need the exercise. Some people just work on portion control, some feel the need to cut out certain things. You gotta find what works for you, as long as it's healthy.

And let him know that squats and lunges will make your butt look fantastic. See if still thinks it's a bad idea! XD

So true! That was pretty much the point I was trying to make to him...I tried eating whatever I want, and I ran all the time! It's not helping me!!! We weighed ourselves this morning and he had already lost 3 pounds to my zero. The man will never know the struggle! lol.

Yes, but will his way be sustainable? If you focus on changing your eating habits, your weight loss will be slow, but will also be long term. He's probably going to gloat over 'being right', so just keep that in mind. ^_^

EmmaFitzwilliam

dubird wrote: »

jenmckane86 wrote: »

dubird wrote: »

Men and women do lose weight differently, so yeah, that's probably what will happen! But then again, not every technique will work for everyone. Some people do fine without exercise, some need the exercise. Some people just work on portion control, some feel the need to cut out certain things. You gotta find what works for you, as long as it's healthy.

And let him know that squats and lunges will make your butt look fantastic. See if still thinks it's a bad idea! XD

So true! That was pretty much the point I was trying to make to him...I tried eating whatever I want, and I ran all the time! It's not helping me!!! We weighed ourselves this morning and he had already lost 3 pounds to my zero. The man will never know the struggle! lol.

Yes, but will his way be sustainable? If you focus on changing your eating habits, your weight loss will be slow, but will also be long term. He's probably going to gloat over 'being right', so just keep that in mind. ^_^

^^^ This. All of this.

SueInAz

Just because he's fit doesn't mean he knows how to lose weight. Most guys have never had to struggle so they just keep doing what they're doing and it happens naturally. Until their age starts to catch up with them.

My husband was rail thin until he hit 30 or so. Then he stopped drinking sugared drinks and dropped a bunch of weight again. He eventually started putting weight on again and now he's got a bit of a gut. He recently stopped eating ice cream every night after dinner and that's helped some but he hasn't really learned anything about how to lose weight except to completely change one aspect of his diet. I try to talk to him about how it all really works in an offhand manner (or how it pertains to me) but he doesn't really listen.

Guys, especially younger ones, will lose weight more quickly. They usually have more mass so they can burn more calories doing the same things we do. You're probably right, he's going to lose weight doing what works for him but that doesn't mean it would work for you. You might try showing him the difference in his calorie burns for doing an activity in comparison to how many you burn doing the same thing.

Syneea

My husband subscribes to a few myths as well, and I thought that he knew better too! LOL Specifically the "not eating past a certain time of day" and the "cutting certain foods to lose weight because if you eat them you Will keep/gain weight"...I have been eating what I normally eat (some junk with "tons" of vegis) at a caloric deficit and working out hard several days ( 5 on average) a week and have been losing..hopefully he will see this, read factual articles and reevaluate some things..but on the other hand, Whatever works for him and helps him to lose is fine too. lol

trying4real

Mine also thinks that just starving himself is the only way for him to lose weight. I have stopped trying to tell him otherwise and just do my own thing lol

jenmckane86

@SueInAz- he just turned 33, and went to 3rd shift at work. That has impacted his weight gain recently. He didn't really start gaining weight until after we got married, 3 years ago. Same here. He switched to light beer and lost a few lbs. I don't know whether to admire or shake my head at his accomplishment.

I almost look at the myths he believes as a, "don't mess with my lucky shirt" type of thing. It worked for him when he was in high school...

Damien_Scott

Weight loss is 80% diet 20% exercise. Exercise is more for strength/toning/etc. You would have to run 4 miles to burn the same amount of calories (700ish) that your body uses to convert 90g of protein into other chemicals. If you work out, don't eat the calories back. Keep to your daily goal without the exercise... unless you absolutely have to then don't sweat going over 100-200 calories that day. And also note that MFP's exercise calorie burn estimates are usually a lot higher than they should be.

The cutting out junk thing is partly true. Those empty calories would be much better suited to a meaningful meal or snack. I've barely changed my diet other than removing empty calories and fried/sugary foods/soda and kept within my 1000 calorie deficit and I've lost 22 lbs in 3 weeks.

On the other hand, my girlfriend has lost about 10-12 lbs in the same amount of time (I was 320 and she was 195). Her deficit is lower but she barely changed her diet. Granted, she never really snacked like I did. The more you weigh the more you tend to lose initially, and men have a larger calorie range to mess with.

acorsaut89

Damien_Scott wrote: »

Weight loss is 80% diet 20% exercise. Exercise is more for strength/toning/etc. You would have to run 4 miles to burn the same amount of calories (700ish) that your body uses to convert 90g of protein into other chemicals. If you work out, don't eat the calories back. Keep to your daily goal without the exercise... unless you absolutely have to then don't sweat going over 100-200 calories that day. And also note that MFP's exercise calorie burn estimates are usually a lot higher than they should be.

The cutting out junk thing is partly true. Those empty calories would be much better suited to a meaningful meal or snack. I've barely changed my diet other than removing empty calories and fried/sugary foods/soda and kept within my 1000 calorie deficit and I've lost 22 lbs in 3 weeks.

On the other hand, my girlfriend has lost about 10-12 lbs in the same amount of time (I was 320 and she was 195). Her deficit is lower but she barely changed her diet. Granted, she never really snacked like I did. The more you weigh the more you tend to lose initially, and men have a larger calorie range to mess with.

Without starting a huge debate, this could also be said for those of us who were really big to start with. For example, I was 340lbs and now I'm just under 260lbs. When I was that big I could lose on eating a lot more than I can now.

While men typically burn more calories and have more muscle mass, it you're really big to start with you will also have a large calorie range to play with until you get down closer to your goal.