Learning to Embrace the Good and Let go of the Bad (sorry, long post)

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morning_joy
morning_joy Posts: 1,063 Member
in Motivation and Support
I have had some pretty substantial things to deal with this year...my son's life threatening illness, his 4th open heart surgery which took about 1/4 of his heart out and replaced with artificial, his following drug addiction and rehabilitation, my divorce, my health issues, job issues. I could let myself get overwhelmed and drown in the victim mentality. I could give myself permission to eat crap and stay in bed depressed but I am choosing a different path. I am going to continue to look for the lessons that these events taught me. I am going to continue asking for support and staying true to my weight loss journey. I am going to let go of the anger, sadness and hurt and choose instead to see the joy that is possible.

My son and I have been asked to move out. We had moved in with my ex (and his dad) after his very expensive hospital stay so I could pay off the debt and get back on my feet. Being in this house has involved a lot of compromises on my part in order for my ex to feel good. I let myself agree to things that were not healthy for me because I was financially dependent on him. He would like me completely cut off from the outside world and just focusing on him and us and I have not been willing to do that again. So we have to move out.

This is ultimately for the best. It is what I wanted when I divorced him 10 months ago. I had very good reasons for leaving then and those still exist. I will figure out the financial stuff and find a way to take care of us. I will create a safe, happy home for my son to recover and heal in and I will heal as well. I will continue down my path to health and happiness and no longer let others dictate what I can and cannot do.

Ultimately this change is another that will be for the best. I will finally be free. I will finally be able to fully claim my life. I will be single and can start thinking about meeting people and inviting people into my life that help me grow and change for the better.

Thank you to all on MFP who have helped me through this year and helped my continue to take care of myself. It has been over a year since I have been bulimic. I am seeing changes in myself that are physical but also mental and emotional. I have learned to value and love myself and know that no one should be allowed to dictate how I live my life.

I ask for support. If you see me slipping into self pity or depression, please remind me that I am on a healthy path and the future is bright.

Replies

  • lessismoreohio
    lessismoreohio Posts: 910 Member
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    A prayer goes out for you and your family.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    Well that seems tons to cope with, but you do seem to be looking at and dealing with each issue as they come along. Be strong and keep reminsing yourself why you are doing things, it sounds as though the place you are heading is a whole lot beter for you than the place you came from.

    This is one of my favourite success threads because of the journey the person went through and how she grew.
    In case you havent seen it

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/971636/my-story-of-sweet-revenge-pics/p1

    Keep going and gl.

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