Need Help-Former Anorexic, Doing it Right

MichelleBogart

I posted this earlier but realized the topic sounded like an intro and not a question. I hope I don't annoy people by fixing the title. I am 38 years old and have been on here about a year. From the time I was 13 until 22, I was either actively an anorexic or just underweight. I finally gained enough in my seventh month of pregnancy to be normal, whatever that is! My son is now 15 and when he was about eight, I finally started really gaining weight. When seats became a little tight, I sat up and took notice. My mother's whole family has a weight problem and I didn't want to go down that road. I lost from 219 to 173 here on MFP and was doing great. However, I really didn't have energy and wondered if I was eating enough. By 173, I was at 1200 calories a day. Due to a lot of factors, I got lax about my exercise. I am still at a deficit most of the time though, so I should still be losing. I have been either gaining (at 182 right now ) or maintaining for several months and am at my wit's end. I am not going to go anorexic again, I am trying to do this the RIGHT way. My diary is open and advice would be great. Don't pay attention to the last few days too much, we have eaten out a lot and today I was bad with eating cake for breakfast and lunch. LOL I know I am not exercising but my deficit is still there. I am supposed to eat like 1500 just to survive but I can't seem to eat enough there. I was told that as I got older, I will find out more affects from my time as an anorexic and a screwy metabolism seems to be one of them. I was TRYING to do a re-set with at least my minimum instead of 1800 where I am supposed to maintain but its been several weeks and I have been unable to eat enough to get there. I am 5' 10" tall and currently at an unhappy 182 lbs. Thanks for any help you can give.