Starting over again, dieting to survive! I have lost control of my body!

Traveler120

MarziPanda95 wrote: »

OP, I would advise you, personally, to NOT take some of this advice. Here's why... if you restrict too much, you will get bored, and you'll eat all the 'junk' you can get your hands on. Do you know what 90% of the successful people on this site have in common? We didn't cut out foods we love. We learnt how to work those foods into our diets. There is NOTHING wrong with treats in moderation. If you have the calories for it, then go ahead and have a bit of chocolate, or some crisps (chips to Americans) or a couple of biscuits.

In my mind I imagine to become 400 lbs, a person has to eat and LOVE to eat a LOT of junk food and while it may different for you and me, for her, having a bit of junk might be a slippery slope she's unable to get out of. She may need to retrain her taste buds and develop an appreciation for whole foods and that may require a complete abstention from junk, at least at this early stage. However, to be fair, if she has the will power to stop at a handful of chips and put the rest of the bag away, then perhaps yes, she can use moderation. But in her own words, she said she has lost control.

MarziPanda95 wrote: »

Plus, throwing out someone else's food is just plain rude. Asking someone to not eat the foods they want in their own home is rude. OP, you are going to see these foods everywhere and you have to learn to deal with it.

Would you say the same thing about an alcoholic? Deal with it? I don't think so. You'd make sure there was no alcohol in the house and if anyone at home wanted a drink, they'd have to go out. It's called support. She has every right to require it from her family. Anything else is undermining the weight loss efforts of a loved one in your family and putting her HEALTH and well being at risk. Now that's worse than rude.

bluebutterfly6

Thank you all again for the great advise!! I feel myself growing stronger inside with everything I read!!!

UpcyclerGirl

Hi Blue Butterfly. Your story touched my heart. What I got most, while reading your story, was sooo much shame. Once you learn to control the shame, your self-esteem will rise, and you will be inspired by your own efforts to control your weight. This dieting thing is not easy, and sometimes, we crash and burn. But every day is a new day to try again. That is how I am choosing to look at it. My story....

Two years ago, I weighed 60 lbs. less than I do now, thanks to this website. But when I hit a plateau that lasted 6 months with no change, no matter what I tried. So, I gave up - and in one year, I had gained back everything I lost. I admit, it was fun to eat again, but I am paying a terrible price. Two years ago, I could wear clothes off-the-rack. Now, I have to special order or shop at the fat girl stores. Two years ago, I kicked blood pressure meds. Now I am on twice as much medication that I was on before. Two years ago, muscles were toned and my stamina was incredible. Today, I can barely walk a block without wheezing, and my hips and knees burn. My shape has so radically changed, I can't even wear the same fat clothes I wore before I started my amazing journey here two years ago. I'm not looking for pity - in fact, I hope my story will encourage those of you working hard at this to STAY WITH IT! Going back to Fatland is no picnic. At my age (55), it's also bloody dangerous, too.

I am now committed to getting "back in the saddle again", and hope some of you will befriend me. You too, Butterfly. We're in this thing together.

bluebutterfly6

Traveler120, I agree with you completely! For me,I have to rid myself of the junk food. The temptation is to great! If I have it, it will call me out everything! I do best when I am in situations where the food isn't there to "haunt" me, if you will. For others it may be different. For me I have lost control and need to discipline myself by breaking old habits and forming anew! Thank you for all your advice!

Chasity6

Hello Bluebutterfly I am glad to meet you. Your story is so similar to mine. I have less to lose than you but not by much. My self esteem is horrible. I am tired of being tired all the time. I just want to take back the life I had in my early 20's when I was active and able to enjoy all the things I like to do. My oldest is in college and youngest is in middle school. So they aren't as dependent on mom for everything now and I just want them to see me make changes for my health to inspire them to eat healthy and make better choices so they don't struggle with weight like I have. Add me as a friend if you like I would really like to have someone with similar stats to do this journey with.

bluebutterfly6

Hello chasity6 it's nice to hear from. Let's take this journey together!

msmossyoak

I love your post. I can relate to you on food being your drug of choice. I feel the same way. It comforts me when I am sad, happy, mad, worried, or any major mood change. I eat when I am full and binge a lot in the afternoon. It seems to be a never ending struggle. I wish you luck in this journey and we are all here to help you at any time.

psalm6932

Baby steps to a totally new lifestyle! You've taken the biggest most important step and that's admitting you need to shed some pounds and take back control of your life. I'm in this with you! I am slowly learning to eat healthy and tracking my calories has totally opened my eyes! We can do this!!

ortiz0714

I am on your boat I feel the same way

meowcat4u

You've got this! Focus on small goals. Eat whole foods. Learn to love fresh veggies. Cook for flavor with lean proteins and lots of colorful veg. Coconut oil is great to use. I had been focused on everything and everyone but me for 10 years. I managed to gain 100 pounds. Without pills or fad diets, I have lost 30 pounds in 3 months. I exercise daily, eat healthy, drink lots of water and if I want a cookie, I eat one. One. But I track every single thing that I eat. Everything. Even that quick handful of almonds (roughly 14 in a handful) I stay focused on today. Once you get in the habit of food tracking, you will see where your calories are concentrated. Exercise is vital. Just walk. You don't need a gym for that. I walk 30-35 miles a week. If you can walk 2 miles on a treadmill, you can easily take the time to walk that in your neighborhood. Download an app "MapMyWalk". That will give you exact distance. Good luck and stay positive! You can do this! Just keep going.

LoreA1960

When I started on my journey my Diabetic Educator told me about MFP. I figured I would try it out and it has become one of my best support systems. (Besides my Diabetic Educator) I weighed 418 pounds at the start and have lost almost 75 pounds so far. I've got a ways to go, but I take it 10 pounds at a time. I have limited mobility because I have Sciatica and no cartilage in my knees, some neuropathy in my feet and torn Achilles tendons. I know exactly how you feel about not being able to do everything your family does. When I was first married my hubby was 125 pounds and when we would take road trips to places I couldn't walk that far and always felt that I was holding him back. I had no self esteem and preferred to stay at home. Now I'm starting to feel much better and getting a lot of encouragement on this site. I wish you all the luck in the world as you start your journey!

bluebutterfly6

Thank you! When I awoke this morning laying in the bed with my lower back hurting so much that it is shooting pain down my leg. I didn't want to get up and make a healthy breakfast. I started thinking of all the quick fixes I had thrown away ( and glad I did!) . If I hadn't I would have gone for that bad bowl of cereal. This pain started this way a few weeks ago. It usually passes with time. I have been on Vicodin for over five years and my goal is to never take them again! So I picked up my phone and went to the community to see if it would help change my mind about making bad choices . IT DID! :-) . I know everyday for a while is going to be a struggle. Thank you all for helping beat that struggle..For today!

DBrooks1979

Glad to see you made a healthy choice and came to the community to get you thru that painful time.. it will get better...

Your story had to have been so hard to share.. but it is an inspiration to others.. so don't look at it as a down point.. look at it as helping yourself and someone who may be just like you...

Welcome to the community and may you find help and comfort and friendship here... feel free to add anyone one of us... regular posting of activity and diet so others can see and be inspired by our journey and lifestyle changes.

k_wills

Well done for making the decision to change. The power is in you...you just have to believe it. Say goodbye to diets and quick fixes, you've been there done that and I'm sure you've ended up heavier than when you started! I'm trying to make permanent changes in my choices of food and after many years of joining gyms and never going, have managed to find a Zumba class that I really enjoy and attend 4 times a week. Stay strong and take 1 day at a time. X

jgnatca

I can relate to so many of your feelings, which is where I was three years ago. My life is transformed from significant weight loss. I got a referral from my doctor for some expert support. But so much of it is a daily, hourly decision on how much I am going to eat.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/jgnatca/view/in-it-for-the-long-haul-focus-722409

For many months after I started I was so beaten down I was not entirely convinced that I could make it. But a single event (after thirty pounds lost) where I was able to recover from a fall, did it for me. I felt for the first time that I could do this.

I could continue to lose more weight but these days I'm focusing on all the things I couldn't do before like running. I recently completed a Tough Mudder which I could not have conceived of a few years ago.

wearmi1

Good morning and good for you for having the courage to put yourself out there. Good luck along our journey, it won't always be easy for you only have 1 life to live make it count!

seraphicdoctor

Hi Bluebutterfly,

I just wanted to say thank you for being courageous and telling us your story. You have a lot of great things in your life (family, etc) and becoming more healthy will put you on track to truly enjoy those things more fully. Good for you!

bluebutterfly6

I truly wish there was a like button for these comments! Thank you all!

sislee

I like what you both have to say I gained weight three years ago after losing 58 lbs. I put on 33 lbs of those that I had lost. Now I am back on track using this site again and it is very helpful. I started back on this program on the 8th of August and have taken off 6-7 lbs so far. Very pleased with my progress. It is going to be a struggle to get it off again but my health will be so much better. I am a 72 year old diabetic on medication twice a day, before I regained those lbs. I did not have to take any. That is my main goal to get off these medications and get healthy again. I write many recipes and will to share is you need them. Good luck and god bless you for your help.