Coming Out...About Your Weight

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  • hekla90
    hekla90 Posts: 595 Member
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    We can see how much you weigh don't know why the specific number catches people up. Heck if people give me grief for my weight I'll go stand on a scale in front of them to shut them up.
  • GillianLF
    GillianLF Posts: 410 Member
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    @Russandol I totally get that, people see me as fatter when they know what I weigh.
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
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    Interesting topic. I've been thinking about this lately because I've had a few comments in the past few days about my weight loss. I just said "I'm down 20 lbs since the 4th of July" but I didn't mention the weight numbers.

    But I'm trying to be mindful of and then let go of a lot of food and weight - related head baggage. I don't know yet whether saying "The Number" out loud will unpack some baggage or reinforce baggage surrounding it.

    To give it a try and see how it feels, I'm going to at least tell you, the anonymous MFP crowd: I am currently at 203, down from 224. Think I'm aiming for 185. We'll see when I get there.
  • GillianLF
    GillianLF Posts: 410 Member
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    rosebarnalice wrote: »
    To give it a try and see how it feels, I'm going to at least tell you, the anonymous MFP crowd: I am currently at 203, down from 224. Think I'm aiming for 185. We'll see when I get there.

    How did that feel? Well done on coming out and on the loss. :)

  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
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    No shame in what I weigh (currently 196) but I keep it to myself because when people know it and that I am trying to lose weight, they get the impression that it's an opening to insert their opinion on how I'm going about doing things (and some try to sell me stuff). My boyfriend knows but that's because he's the only one who isn't like that.
  • Kaken21
    Kaken21 Posts: 78 Member
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    People used to make comments about my weight loss all the time. To be fair my family, friends, and co-workers saw me drop about 90 pounds so it seems only natural to me that they would ask how much I'd lost etc. I don't think they ever asked how much I weighed at the time though. Since I've moved to a new town no one here knew me as that 255 pound girl so people don't ask or make comments. This morning I stepped on the scale and it said 158. I have no problem telling my family, friends and people on mfp what I weigh. I'm 5'10 and my weight is being stubborn and it's still hanging on to my lower abdomen and thighs. One day at a time, right?
  • LaceyBirds
    LaceyBirds Posts: 451 Member
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    Interesting posts. I started at 230 and have lost 51 pounds, with 44 or so to go. I haven't told anybody what I weighed/weigh - only my doctor's office knows. I would say the DMV too, but I lied on my license. :)

    I have told three people that I'm losing weight, and one of them I only told once, when I had lost twenty pounds. The other two are relatives I see a couple of times a week. The last time I told them was when I had lost 35 pounds. This weekend I will likely be seeing one of their daughters, who I haven't seen since last Christmas - I've lost 35 pounds since then. I don't know if she will notice, but I plan to wear my new, smaller pants and shirts when I see her and see if she does. But I am now starting to hesitate if I will actually say how much I have lost. I too am horribly embarrassed about how much I have weighed, and, in fact, I am certainly not proud of weighing "only" 179 pounds. Yes, people know I was obese, but putting a number of well over 200 pounds to that weight, especially for a woman, just makes something concrete that had previously been vague, and I think more people would judge you even more negatively for that what they would see as an astronomical number than by what you look like. Just my opinion.

    So, I don't know now if I'm going to share numbers any longer. I think I may just say something like "I've lost a lot, and still have a way to go" and leave it at that. If they ask for numbers, then, well, I will handle it maturely by screaming, bursting into tears and running from the room. Or something. :blush:
  • BewitchedBelinda99
    BewitchedBelinda99 Posts: 253 Member
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    Really ashamed of my weight. My daughter knows and my mum knows. My daughter is really supportive but my mum is terrible! Don't know if it means anything but my mum is overweight and my youngest daughter isn't! None of my children are though. I would maybe tell a partner if I had one but I did once have a boyfriend who was horrible about my weight and I was 50-60lbs lighter then. He called me ugly too though. I'm 44 and I wish I could love myself more.
  • bibimazoon
    bibimazoon Posts: 50 Member
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    Maybe it's an age thing? I know when I was younger I would never have told anyone my weight. But now at 54, I'm pretty open about it to anyone and everyone :)
  • shadow2soul
    shadow2soul Posts: 7,692 Member
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    At my heaviest the only people who knew what I weighed was my doctor, the nurses in the doctors office and my husband. As I lost weight though, I became more open about it. For me though, I was pretty much ashamed of what I had done to myself. I grew up thin and didn't start putting on the pounds until after I married. When it got to the point that I had a BMI of 44, well I didn't even want to admit or accept that myself. It was the only time frame in my life that what I weighed bothered me and the only time that I wasn't open with people about it.
  • LaceyBirds
    LaceyBirds Posts: 451 Member
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    bibimazoon wrote: »
    Maybe it's an age thing? I know when I was younger I would never have told anyone my weight. But now at 54, I'm pretty open about it to anyone and everyone :)

    I'll be 60 in a month, so I just think it's an individual thing, and I have also seen that I was enthusiastic at first about telling, but it has changed. Also, I think it depends on the people you know, their lifestyles, weight, fitness level, etc. The family I live near are all small people, and only one of their children is a little bit overweight. They eat tiny portion sizes, and have said enough things about overweight/not fit people that I think they will see my weight-loss as a good thing, but probably have felt very negatively about my being obese/overweight. They will never understand how I became obese or how difficult it can be to lose weight.

    However family I have in another state are all currently overweight, a couple obese, so I would feel much more comfortable telling them, as they would absolutely understand how difficult this is and completely understand how I got overweight in the first place.
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
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    GillianLF wrote: »
    rosebarnalice wrote: »
    To give it a try and see how it feels, I'm going to at least tell you, the anonymous MFP crowd: I am currently at 203, down from 224. Think I'm aiming for 185. We'll see when I get there.

    How did that feel? Well done on coming out and on the loss. :)
    So far so good--

  • jmpaterno
    jmpaterno Posts: 47 Member
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    I love this thread! I recently told my boyfriend how much I weigh, and it was a huge relief and also really helpful. He's always been supportive and has always liked how I look, but hearing him say he didn't think I needed to lose much weight wasn't terribly motivating. Actually, the first time I told him how much I wanted to lose (at least sixty pounds), he couldn't believe it and thought it was a bit much. But since I told him my starting weight and how "bad" it had gotten (and how much it really upset me), he's been supportive in new ways. He's 100 percent on board with my goal, keeping junk food out of the house, and being even happier for me as I drop weight. I know it's obvious I've gained weight, but I guess because we see each other every day (we live together), it was hard for him to know how much/how serious I have to be about this without hearing the number. I think it's also important for me to be able to have honest conversations about my weight/my attitude toward it while I adjust my lifestyle.

    Anyway, sorry for the wall of text! Long story short, I "came out" and am glad I did!
  • Ashtoretet
    Ashtoretet Posts: 378 Member
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    My close coworkers know what I'm doing and a few others who don't see me as often have commented on it after hitting the 40 pound mark. No one's actually asked my weight.

    Now I'm getting into the frustrating zone where I've lost quite a bit, so now some people are saying I should stop. But I tell them I'm still in an overweight range and that I plan to keep losing quite a bit more. It really makes no sense to me since a few women we work with are definitely 00, I don't know why 159 pound me draws more attention than them.

    Meanwhile, I just looked at a clothing site that thinks I'm a 3x. (I wear a misses Large according to most Macy's brands.) There needs to be a middle ground! Though I guess that's what MFP is ♥
  • GillianLF
    GillianLF Posts: 410 Member
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    Well I am 12 stone 0.4. I wanted so badly to get under 12 stone at my last weigh in but it stayed in the same place. Due another weigh in tomorrow and here's hoping.

    I've no problem telling you guys but seriously I don't think I'll tell my mum again!
  • workin_onit
    workin_onit Posts: 102 Member
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    I just read all these posts, it's so interesting.

    Gillian, you are some kinda courageous...!

    My weight has been up and down over the years, mostly up, and certainly up after I had my daughter. I'm currently almost as heavy as I was right before I had her, almost 12 years ago.

    I have taken to posting my weight here but telling people in my life about it? Nuh-uh. This is a big pet peeve for me because I married someone whose family discusses their weight, their weight loss, their fitness plans, etc. etc. Now, they are all normal weights, and have never had to diet, like, ever.

    I just keep my mouth closed. If they start noticing when I've lost more weight (currently 6 pounds down!), I will say "thank you for noticing, I feel great!" and leave it at that.

    SW 248.5
    CW 242.5
    GW 190?
  • yusaku02
    yusaku02 Posts: 3,472 Member
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    I don't mind anyone knowing what I weight. About 183 last I checked. My girlfriend will hop on the scale in front of me without a second thought as well. Even when I was pretty fat I didn't mind telling people what I weighed.
  • allbarrett
    allbarrett Posts: 159 Member
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    I have never felt an urge to talk to people about my weight (or my diet, my salary, my religious or political affiliations, etc.), it doesn't really seem to be anyone's business. My doctor needs to know my weight, for health reasons (but she weighs me on her office scale right there during my physical), and my husband knows because we live together and how could he not? Otherwise, I would actually be offended or at least taken aback if anyone asked. Maybe I'm weird, or just boring.
  • chelleb1974
    chelleb1974 Posts: 69 Member
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    I don't purposely go around telling people what I weigh, and if I were asked I'm pretty sure I'd tell them what I weigh. I started 10yrs ago at 268, lost 100 lbs, gained it all back, lost it again (4 hrs ago) and 40lbs have crept back on. Not letting that happen again. My boyfriend knows what I've lost and gained, and knows what I currently weigh....not sure if I ever told him what I started at, but he's smart and can figure it out, or ask, if he wants to know. He met me three years ago (at about 90lb loss) and has always told me I was beautiful and sexy. He is 100% supportive of me eating healthier (and as a result - losing weight).
  • boricua3177
    boricua3177 Posts: 192 Member
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    My own husband doesn't know exactly how much I weigh. It's a huge source of shame for me since I ballooned & gained almost 80lbs. But I have no problem talking about what size clothes I am wearing though! I have gone down from a (squeezing) size 16 and am now wearing a size 12. So, when I talk about my weight I talk about what size I want to get down to. ;-)

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