Need urgent help and motivation

mandy220750

Hi everyone,

I am slowly becoming unable to do normal things due to my weight.

I am very overweight.

Need to lose over 100lbs. To tell the real truth nearer 150lbs.

That is hard to admit.

I live alone, do not have any friends.

However have a small number of family who are very supportive and never comment on my size.

I work and also do voluntary work but sit down for this.

Most people think I am a nice and happy person who goes out of the way to help people. But they do not know me. On my own I am very depressed, to the point sometimes of trying to understand what us the point of my life. I hate living alone.

I would like to go for walks etc but due to my size cannot walk very far, also may have arthritis in one leg which is very painful. I find it hard just to do my housework. Which now takes so long to do.

It's a vicious circle for me, depressed because of my weight, eat because I am depressed.

How can I break this circle.

Sorry to sound so defeated but its how I feel

Thank you for reading this

tequila5000

Hello mandy220750! you should be commended for coming to this community where you can get support and learn from others! You will find it here.

You said that you would like to go for walks, well that sounds like a great thing to do. Its understandable that you say you can't walk too far, but that can change. Maybe start small, like really small. Like, just for today, walk to the end of the block and back. Then after doing that a couple of days, go to the end of the block, and then just to the very 1st mailbox of the next block. and so on, with tiny incremental increases. Before long you will be surprised at the distance that you cover. If you are able to walk outside during daylight, the sunshine and fresh air might even help with your depressed feelings. For me, the best non-drug treatment for depression has been (and probably always will be) outdoor exercise in the daylight.

Another thought, because you mentioned arthritis...what kind of exercise has your doctor (or physical therapist) suggested that you do? We don't want to worsen any current problems

this1strongman

For me I realized that it is a journey. No journey you set out on with worth wild goals will be a easy. Once I understood and accepted that I knew I was heading into the right direction. Also understand that you didnt put the weight on over night so it wont come off over night either. Whatever end goals you have may seem very big. I suggest breaking your goals down smaller and smaller til it you know whatever you're wanting to do it's achievable with hard work and dedication. Dont get discouraged by not hit your goals or anything just keep pushing forward. Celebrate ALL your accomplishments big and small. Don't put yourself down or talk down a victory. I recognize ALL victories in moving toward a health lifestyle. It's what gives you the motivation and desire to keep going. Love yourself and dont compare yourself to anyone else. All you need to do is be about ahat tou can do and challenge yourself daily. Challenge yours physically, emtionally and mentally. Recognize what your triggers are and develop a plan to use them to your advantage and not let them control you. I say these things because i have struggled before with some of the things you're dealing with but I made a decision to change for me because I know it's what I deserved. You deserve to be happy and now you must do what necessary to take your happiness back. Life will give you what you're willing to fight for or what you're willing to accept. I hooe some if these things help. Oh remember one thing... "ALL YOU CAN DO IS ALL YOU CAN DO AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS ENOUGH." -ART WILLIAMS

Be blessed and feel free to contact me.

PinkPixiexox

Hello - welcome

First of all, you've made the first step. MFP has an amazing community aspect that has really helped me in many, many ways. There is so much support available here and not just geared toward weight loss so please don't be afraid to reach out. There are so many fantastic people to meet here and I truly believe you will find that confidence to succeed and do the things you love.

Please have faith in yourself, always hold your head high and stay strong. I promise you can do this.

mandy220750

Hi all,
Thanks for all the positive comments.

I assume I have arthritis. I year ago I hurt my leg which has never got better I now walk with a limp.

I have been to the doctors twice, to accident and emergency and to phyiso once.

Nobody has given me a definite diagnosis and at every appointment felt as though I was wasting their time.

So just hobbled along in pain since then.

I have not had any xray or scan, have not been offered this. Feel that the medical profession do not care. Perhaps just because I am very overweight. I also asked for help in weight loss but none given. So its up to me alone.

It is very hard for me to bear this big weight on my leg so find it difficult to exercise by walking. Cannot swim and would be too embarrassed to try. Would an exercise bike work for me?

I am going to start yet again to try and lose weight from now.

First goal to lose a stone

I am so low at the moment, so bear with me.

It has taken me a while to write this, I am very tearful.

Sorry

shegrasshopper

Hi Mandy! I feel it's awesome that you have found the courage to reach out through this blog and be honest about where you are at in your life. That's a great first step! I understand how hard it can be. I also suffer from depression and some days are so grey and gloomy even though the sun is shining brightly in the sky. If you do think you have arthritis I would encourage you to seek out a rheumatologist. They specifically treat arthritis. I know because I have RA and I see a rheumatologist. Continue to take baby steps. Keep moving. Eat better. And even though the tears keep falling, keep moving forward. Life will get better and you will become happier and healthier. Keep up the good fight, you can do it!

jgnatca

You are where I was three years ago. I got referral to a specialized team through my doctor to help me lose the weight. I've been to many dietitian consults and classes along the way. I am so very grateful to have my mobility return, which is my favourite thing about shedding the weight.

There was some depression in there but I think my chief emotion was anger. Anger (which was likely fear turned outward) that people would assume I was stupid or slothful for ending up so heavy. Perhaps I feared I was incorrigibly stupid and slothful.

I can also relate to being externally pleasant and cheerful. Obese people rate low on the social scale, so pleasantness is pretty well required to be appreciated.

After losing my first thirty pounds I started to see evidence of my progress, mobility gains being the chief of them, and I perked up, got proud. I'm a different woman today.

You can lose a lot of weight from dietary reduction alone. MFP is very good for that, and my dietitian recommended using it.

I collect exercises that can be done at home or can be done by people with mobility/strength issues, because I've been there. Here's a collection of ideas for you. Let your body be your guide. If your joints snap or hurt, it's too hard. Dial it back.

https://www.pinterest.com/janetkarasz/fitness-routine/

https://www.pinterest.com/janetkarasz/fitness-at-home/

rnohou2010

Well, you have taken an important first step in joining this board and making public your situation. That takes courage. Now you have come out of the closet, so to speak. I have been bingeing recently and have now decided I just can't keep any of my binge food in the house. I also just started taking Vyvanse, a stimulant that has just been approved by the FDA for binge overeating disorder. But I don't know if you binge or just eat large portions.

I have faith you are about to start turning things around! Please keep us posted.

cookiealbright

I hurt myself 4 years ago and my legs had alot of pain and everytime I went to the doctors they told me you have arthritis. I thought that was crap because up until I got hurt I was very active and it made no sense to me that one minute I was fine - then injury - then arthritis so bad that I felt like my hip was going to give out. I thought for sure there was a walker in my near future. I'm 59 so this happened when I was 55. The doctors saw someone my age limping and it was arthritis.

Two weeks ago I went to a chiropractor and he said I walk like one leg is shorter than the other. He measured and they are both the same size. He say very casually that my hip is jammed up and he could adjust it. The next day I was in some pain, but my legs seemed stronger and I could tell that I was walking differently because I got a blister on my foot in the same shoes I wear all the time. I feel great now stronger in the legs and I don't feel like my hip is giving out.

You have to fine a doctor that will LISTEN to you. It's not going to be easy or fast. It took me 4 years! Keep searching you should not have to live in pain. I know what that is like and it sucks and that can be a big part of you being depressed! Good luck to ya!

Chasity6

So sorry that you are suffering alone. Hoping you can find help with your leg to help you feel better and get more active. The best part of MFP is the support. There is always someone willing to give good advice and help you along your journey. Good luck on your journey. Feel free to add me as a friend if you would like.

randomsue

You made that first important step, you want a change. It can happen but quick changes aren't going to happen and it's not healthy anyway. Use this app and community board for encouraging support and ideas. Some have already posted some sound advice. You stated you can't walk far but taking baby steps is OK. You want to make changes that you can build upon. Walk to the point and back that's comfortable for you...do this 2-3 times a week. Then increase the days, then the distance. Before you know it, you will surprise yourself with what you can do.

Check out the YMCA, either for membership or for classes. I know that mine offers free pre-diabetes classes (offering management strategies and nutrition info) and you don't have to be a member to do that. Planet fitness doesn't offer classes but it's cheaper. I guess I'm saying that if you want to join a gym but feel you are too heavy, please don't think that way. I used to think that I would have to lose weight to join a gym. I kid you not! A friend of mine lost 150 pounds and felt self conscious about working out but it turned out that she inspired others with her determination. You might be working out next to that woman that was in your shoes just a few years ago. You really don't know. A zumba instructor at my gym used to be 120 pounds overweight. The gym is to GET healthy and to stay healthy. ☺

Find another doctor stat. A doctor that isnt listening to you is worthless. You are not alone honey. Please feel free to add me if you like.

mandy220750

Hi,

Started my diet today.

Going ok. I have made some homemade soup which will last a few days.

Thank you for all your advise.

My leg is very painful today so hard to walk at all.

However did go by car into the village and walk through the village to the church centre to drop off some donations and back again of course.

Also managed to brush up outside and complete some other household chores.

On my own so it will be a long day.

I was going to the local food fair but decided not too. I would only buy food I do not need.

I think once I lose some weight I will be able to walk better. At the moment the amount of weight I am carrying causes alot of pain in my leg.

I was checked out a couple of years ago for diabetes, heart, blood pressure and cholesterol. All ok except for blood pressure which was a little high but did not need any tablets.

I am 52 years old and up until I was 50 had never had any health problems. Never even had nay

mandy220750

oops pressed the wrong button.

as i was saying never even had any childhood illnesses.

So I am taking this leg problem badly

I must lose weight for my future

Thank you for reading this

jtitus311

All I can say is you are in the right place. There are awesome people on here to keep you going and give you motivation. Just take things day by day and if thats too much to start, go meal by meal. It isn't easy but it is possible. I am seeing the numbers decrease on the scale for me and I couldn't have done it without the tips I get on here and the motivation and support from my friends on here. Welcome. It will sucks some times but seeing the scale move down adds to the motivation. Hang in there. Step by step you CAN do this.

try2again

Good morning, Mandy! Great start The soup sounds terrific! Just remember, you are not on a diet and this is not a race. Eat as many calories as MFP recommends. You're going to be eating this way for a long time, so make it sustainable for you

randomsue

mandy220750 wrote: »

Hi,

Started my diet today.

Going ok. I have made some homemade soup which will last a few days.

Thank you for all your advise.

My leg is very painful today so hard to walk at all.

However did go by car into the village and walk through the village to the church centre to drop off some donations and back again of course.

Also managed to brush up outside and complete some other household chores.

On my own so it will be a long day.

I was going to the local food fair but decided not too. I would only buy food I do not need.

I think once I lose some weight I will be able to walk better. At the moment the amount of weight I am carrying causes alot of pain in my leg.

I was checked out a couple of years ago for diabetes, heart, blood pressure and cholesterol. All ok except for blood pressure which was a little high but did not need any tablets.

I am 52 years old and up until I was 50 had never had any health problems. Never even had nay

That's wonderful. You made a wise choice not going to the food fair. Just sampling food can add up. Find that good doctor and get a full checkup. Until then, keep moving but don't hurt yourself. Slow and steady. You made great progress today. You are well on your way to meeting your goals. Grest job!