Big Bones?
Mosiak
Posts: 41 Member
I'm 177cm male (5'10 ish)
I'm 143kg (315lbs), and according BMI calculators I should be 75kg (165lbs). That seems very thin and light.
My mom always told me when I was growing up that it's impossible for me to be slim, I was always a chunky kid, and really blew up in my teens and there after. She always told me that because I have big bones, being slim like,, say Ryan Gosling or something like that would be impossible for me.
Is there any truth in that? If I get down to 75kg or even 80kg, will I still look a bit chunky? and fatter compared to some other guy around my height and target weight?
This is probably a dumb question but for years this has been my worry, that I'll never look healthy and fit, I'll always just look chunky and chubbyish or too thick with non muscle mass but fat because of some giant skeleton.
I'm 143kg (315lbs), and according BMI calculators I should be 75kg (165lbs). That seems very thin and light.
My mom always told me when I was growing up that it's impossible for me to be slim, I was always a chunky kid, and really blew up in my teens and there after. She always told me that because I have big bones, being slim like,, say Ryan Gosling or something like that would be impossible for me.
Is there any truth in that? If I get down to 75kg or even 80kg, will I still look a bit chunky? and fatter compared to some other guy around my height and target weight?
This is probably a dumb question but for years this has been my worry, that I'll never look healthy and fit, I'll always just look chunky and chubbyish or too thick with non muscle mass but fat because of some giant skeleton.
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I am "big boned". Those of us with a slightly larger bone structure look better with muscle, but it's not impossible to get thin no matter what your bone structure is. Even slim guys like Ryan Gosling have muscle and it's actually part of what makes them look slim in the way they do.
Forget BMI and focus on body fat. Lifting weights can help you look great when you lose the fat, plus it will help you lose fat. Don't worry about if you'll look like a specific person, you'll look like you except better. There is hope that you will not end up chunky or chubby or thick.0 -
Nope, you are not cursed to be fat because you have "big bones".
You may be broader/taller due to your skeleton structure, but you most certainly can lose weight and be slim.
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I am "big boned". Those of us with a slightly larger bone structure look better with muscle, but it's not impossible to get thin no matter what your bone structure is. Even slim guys like Ryan Gosling have muscle and it's actually part of what makes them look slim in the way they do.
Forget BMI and focus on body fat. Lifting weights can help you look great when you lose the fat, plus it will help you lose fat. Don't worry about if you'll look like a specific person, you'll look like you except better. There is hope that you will not end up chunky or chubby or thick.
All of this. For some people at your height, 75 kg could be just right. For others, it could make them look sickly because they have a larger frame. Eat in a calorie deficit, lift heavy, and you'll find your new body.0 -
I am "big boned". Those of us with a slightly larger bone structure look better with muscle, but it's not impossible to get thin no matter what your bone structure is. Even slim guys like Ryan Gosling have muscle and it's actually part of what makes them look slim in the way they do.
Forget BMI and focus on body fat. Lifting weights can help you look great when you lose the fat, plus it will help you lose fat. Don't worry about if you'll look like a specific person, you'll look like you except better. There is hope that you will not end up chunky or chubby or thick.
Thank you, this is really helpful. I do plan on increasing my muscle mass, and gain stamina. I have such back problems because of belly weight so I am hoping that ones I drop maybe 30kg or maybe 20 that I'll be able to move my body around with more comfort. I do still move around as much as I can of course, anything is better than nothing.
I will do like you advice, I wont worry too much about BMI, I'll just work on reducing this fat and gain more muscle to strengthen my joints and my back. Thank you so much for the reply.
Nope, you are not cursed to be fat because you have "big bones".
You may be broader/taller due to your skeleton structure, but you most certainly can lose weight and be slim.
That photo! wow, even the skeleton on the right seems broader than the skeleton on the left. That was helpful to see, and to see that I, as you say, am not cursed to be fat. Thank you!.
All of this. For some people at your height, 75 kg could be just right. For others, it could make them look sickly because they have a larger frame. Eat in a calorie deficit, lift heavy, and you'll find your new body.
Yea, I don't think BMI is accurate enough for every individual, they dont seem to take into account muscle weight, so a really muscular guy being heavy due to large muscles will sometimes be clocked as over weight.
I put 75kg as my weight goal but I feel its too low for me personally, but I am gonna keep it at 75 just because and when I get close to it, maybe then I will see better if its too light for me. Thank you so much for your input
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I suggest starting some strength training as soon as you can. Even if all you can do or all you have access to is body weight. It will go a long way to helping you keep your muscle through weight loss.0
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I suggest starting some strength training as soon as you can. Even if all you can do or all you have access to is body weight. It will go a long way to helping you keep your muscle through weight loss.
What sort of exercises for strength would you suggest? I don't have access to a gym, I also cannot afford any equipment, so anything I can do at home or outside near my home? that is appropriate for my current mobility?
I can do a lot of things, I can move around quite a bit, but carrying my belly while walking is really the only problems I have when it comes to mobility, I still go out and walk, I just cant walk very fast or very far without being in a lot of pain.
Also thank you so much for taking the time to guide me a little bit, I don't really have anyone in my life to help me, guide me or give me advice. I really appreciate it.
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The only thing that happens for us big-boned folks is that our bones show at higher weights than other people, imho. So you'd look too skinny, possibly, at weights where others wouldn't.
Well, that and we really won't fit in the smallest size outfits, as you might imagine. But your body won't look fat even if you wear a larger size, really.
I'm 'thicker', quite literally, than many girls my height, but it's usually very clear that it's not fat. Maybe not in winter clothes, but certainly at the beach
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This is probably a dumb question but for years this has been my worry, that I'll never look healthy and fit, I'll always just look chunky and chubbyish or too thick with non muscle mass but fat because of some giant skeleton.
I think we only look chubby if we are chubby. KWIM? I have a broad barrel chest for a woman, and slightly larger than average bones. If anything (like some else said) it makes it so that our frame /bones can be seen at a higher weight so we actually look thinner.
I'm 5'8" and I have many friends around that height. They are surprised that I weigh 155 because it seems like a heavy weight for how I now look. I'm not skinny, but my collar bones are prominent, my elbows are getting to be a wider part of my arms, and my ribs are becoming quite clear. If I was smaller framed/boned there is no way that I would be able to carry this much weight and look slim.
Bigger bones is definitely a plus in my book.0 -
cafeaulait7 wrote: »The only thing that happens for us big-boned folks is that our bones show at higher weights than other people, imho. So you'd look too skinny, possibly, at weights where others wouldn't.
Well, that and we really won't fit in the smallest size outfits, as you might imagine. But your body won't look fat even if you wear a larger size, really.
I'm 'thicker', quite literally, than many girls my height, but it's usually very clear that it's not fat. Maybe not in winter clothes, but certainly at the beach
You look good, if you are what this so called "big boned" is then I guess I really got nothing to worry about!0 -
I suggest starting some strength training as soon as you can. Even if all you can do or all you have access to is body weight. It will go a long way to helping you keep your muscle through weight loss.
What sort of exercises for strength would you suggest? I don't have access to a gym, I also cannot afford any equipment, so anything I can do at home or outside near my home? that is appropriate for my current mobility?
I can do a lot of things, I can move around quite a bit, but carrying my belly while walking is really the only problems I have when it comes to mobility, I still go out and walk, I just cant walk very fast or very far without being in a lot of pain.
Also thank you so much for taking the time to guide me a little bit, I don't really have anyone in my life to help me, guide me or give me advice. I really appreciate it.
Look into You Are Your Own Gym.0 -
I'm 177cm male (5'10 ish)
I'm 143kg (315lbs), and according BMI calculators I should be 75kg (165lbs). That seems very thin and light.
My mom always told me when I was growing up that it's impossible for me to be slim, I was always a chunky kid, and really blew up in my teens and there after. She always told me that because I have big bones, being slim like,, say Ryan Gosling or something like that would be impossible for me.
Is there any truth in that? If I get down to 75kg or even 80kg, will I still look a bit chunky? and fatter compared to some other guy around my height and target weight?
This is probably a dumb question but for years this has been my worry, that I'll never look healthy and fit, I'll always just look chunky and chubbyish or too thick with non muscle mass but fat because of some giant skeleton.
I was 149kg and I'm 170 cm. A goal weight range of 58 - 72kg seemed so tiny to me back when I started, I was always bigger and taller than other kids right from when I was little. My mother also told me I was "big boned" and that I just needed to lose "puppy fat" (ugh).
So here's my experience - I'm currently around 78kg. At this weight, I haven't lost my basic body shape (pear, so my bottom half is chunkier than my top). The bones in my upper body stick out - clavicle, shoulder blades, I can see all my ribs and the outline of bones in my sternum. I was frisked at the airport last year and the security guard thought I had a concealed gun. It was my ribs (that made me LOL if I'm honest).
I have a lot of loose skin, and as I mentioned, I carry more weight in my lower half. I lift weights, and I have done throughout my weight loss journey so I also have some decent muscle definition. For the last year I've been at maintenance and concentrating on lifting.
I don't think I look fat anymore, although I'm not technically happy with my weight yet. Anecdotal evidence, but my clothing size seems to be consistent with my friends who actually weigh much less than me, and many people don't realise now that I still weigh what I do. So I don't think you're doomed. More to the point though, even if you do lose the weight and still look bigger or chunkier than other guys at your target weight - does it matter? Because you're going to be much healthier than you are if you stay at 143 kg.0 -
That photo is just silly. Even if it's genuine, it's no way to tell if the person it depicts ever claimed to be "big boned". You can be fat or skinny unrelated to frame build. Just as some people are taller, some people are broader. Bones and joints can be of different thickness. (The weight of the skeleton is not very different at the same height. That's not what we're talking about, but it always comes up. Just as that picture.) If you really have a broad skeleton, you may look gaunt at a higher weight than a person with a narrower frame, but you will NOT stay "chubby" if you lose enough weight. You may never look like an underwear model, but most people don't, either. And the scale doesn't even tell the whole story. A good distribution of fat and muscle is what makes a person healthy and look attractive.0
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kommodevaran wrote: »That photo is just silly. Even if it's genuine, it's no way to tell if the person it depicts ever claimed to be "big boned".
But that wasn't the point of the photo. It is a little silly but it proves a good point. OP was worried he would never be able to be slim because his mother said his "big bones" would make it impossible. I used the photo as an example as how he isn't his size because of the size of his bones. His frame might always be broader, but his bones are not the cause of his weight gain and they will not hinder his weightloss.0 -
kommodevaran wrote: »That photo is just silly. Even if it's genuine, it's no way to tell if the person it depicts ever claimed to be "big boned".
But that wasn't the point of the photo. It is a little silly but it proves a good point. OP was worried he would never be able to be slim because his mother said his "big bones" would make it impossible. I used the photo as an example as how he isn't his size because of the size of his bones. His frame might always be broader, but his bones are not the cause of his weight gain and they will not hinder his weightloss.
OK, that makes sense. Thank you.0 -
Honestly I think your focus should be more in small steps. Looking at the finish goal can seem unattainable and kind of hard to motivate yourself for when progress is slow. Set your finish goal but set smaller, more frequent and attainable goals. Celebrate those successes as you reach them. Start with making a meal plan. Portion out snacks so you don't impulse eat. Focus on healthy and filling foods. Second. Form an excercise plan. Make sure your doctor approves of your plan! Start out walking 30 minutes and build from there. Third- take body measurements.you will be encouraged by the change you can't always feel or "see". Fourth. Find an accountability partner. Someone to help encourage you, keep you on track and who will celebrate with you. You can always post here and get lots of support. Lastly be patient with yourself. Don't worry about bones and if they are big or not. Focus on what you can change. I understand how you are thinking. My hips have spread a bit after pregnancy. Ok so I'm curvier. But I am healthy, slimmer, muscular and fit. Took me a long time to have my mental image of myself- you know- that critical eye you see yourself with?-Took a long time for it to match what I actually saw in the mirror! This is where patience comes in handy. Read up on food and excercise. You can change your life and your body. If it was not TOTALLY POSSIBLE then we wouldn't be here to encourage you. I'm a mom of 5, 51 and have gone from 200 lbs post pregnancy to 130. Yep- totally possible!0
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I have such back problems because of belly weight so I am hoping that ones I drop maybe 30kg or maybe 20 that I'll be able to move my body around with more comfort.
It was my back flaring up that made me realise I'd put even more weight on. I started at 252lb, so I don't know what it will be like for you, but just dropping the first 10lb improved things dramatically for me. I still get twinges, but it hasn't flared up at all since the beginning of September. I'd hope that even the same for you would help relieve it a bit.
And hey, we may never look like Ryan Gosling, but being healthy and free of back pain is worth the hard work all on its own.kommodevaran wrote: »That photo is just silly.
While it's interesting and it does illustrate the point very well - OP can be slim, no matter what his mother said - the photo is silly. It's not the same person, so the comparison is a bit off. The person who made the image is an utter egg, because the one on the left is female (breasts, crotch, bigger pelvic cavity), the one on the right is male (bigger pelvic bone, base of penis visible at the bottom of the image). Not criticising KateTii at all for posting the pic as she made her point well, just think it's sensible to point out it's not the same person for comparison reasons.0 -
I don't think that being chunky as a kid is the same as being "big boned"
I think that most often, people use the term as a way to say "I have a tendency to being overweight". (**flame away**)
BUT there are definitely some people that have a wider or thicker frame/skeletal structure than others -- meaning they are going to be perceived as bigger that someone else with very similar weight and body composition that has an otherwise more narrow frame. -- that's what I called big boned.
With that said, I don't think that every man is meant to be as lean as Ryan Gosling(sp?) Just as some girls will never have a thigh gap or a tiny waist no matter how fit they are.
Personally, I will never have a tiny, cinched waist, but can have thigh gap naturally. My best friend has a tiny waist and full hips and thighs.
I mean, even a lot professional athletes are not that lean and small -- some are lean and huge, some are muscular yet carry a lot more body fat along with the muscle making up for a larger circumference.
You are concerned that you will never look fit because you have a bigger frame (bigger than Ryan) Well, look at someone like "The Rock" Dwayne Johnson. If you look up pictures of him when he was younger, you can see that he was kinda chunky and def. had/has a big frame -- if you look at pictures of him now, nobody would argue that
a) He is fit and in good shape
b) He does not have a small frame
c)his body is not similar to Ryan G's)
D) He looks fantastic despite not looking like Ryan G.
There are many, many types of bodies that are fit and athletic -- there isn't a narrow scope for a man or a woman -- look at sprinters, gymnasts, different weight boxers, wrestlers, basketball players -- all different and still working their body types to the max
My point is, work with your body type, not against it.
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beachhouse758 wrote: »I don't think that being chunky as a kid is the same as being "big boned"
I think that most often, people use the term as a way to say "I have a tendency to being overweight". (**flame away**)
BUT there are definitely some people that have a wider or thicker frame/skeletal structure than others -- meaning they are going to be perceived as bigger that someone else with very similar weight and body composition that has an otherwise more narrow frame. -- that's what I called big boned.
With that said, I don't think that every man is meant to be as lean as Ryan Gosling(sp?) Just as some girls will never have a thigh gap or a tiny waist no matter how fit they are.
Personally, I will never have a tiny, cinched waist, but can have thigh gap naturally. My best friend has a tiny waist and full hips and thighs.
I mean, even a lot professional athletes are not that lean and small -- some are lean and huge, some are muscular yet carry a lot more body fat along with the muscle making up for a larger circumference.
You are concerned that you will never look fit because you have a bigger frame (bigger than Ryan) Well, look at someone like "The Rock" Dwayne Johnson. If you look up pictures of him when he was younger, you can see that he was kinda chunky and def. had/has a big frame -- if you look at pictures of him now, nobody would argue that
a) He is fit and in good shape
b) He does not have a small frame
c)his body is not similar to Ryan G's)
D) He looks fantastic despite not looking like Ryan G.
There are many, many types of bodies that are fit and athletic -- there isn't a narrow scope for a man or a woman -- look at sprinters, gymnasts, different weight boxers, wrestlers, basketball players -- all different and still working their body types to the max
My point is, work with your body type, not against it.
Great post.
I have a large frame. I'm 5'5", but I'll never be able to fit in a size 0 and I don't think my waist can go under 29 inches (I'm 30 currently and there isn't much to lose there).
I don't fit I'll ever look 'slim' because of that either. But I still look pretty good and I look fit (I'm 133 pounds).0 -
Thank you everybody for your wonderful advice and guidance. I feel better about this big bone issues, I don't mind being bulky I just don't want to be fat, I've been fat all my life and I'm done with it, and I was worried that this old wives tail about big bones was true. I'm grateful to you all for taking the time to help me clear this up, Thank you 0
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Your bones are about 15% - 20% of your weight. If you weigh 200 lbs. Your bones are about 30 lbs. of that weight. 170 lbs of the rest is "other stuff" but not bones. Saying you're big boned to gloss over being overweight is a an old wives tale. Just a myth that still around from when people knew little about human anatomy.0
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Your bones are about 15% - 20% of your weight. If you weigh 200 lbs. Your bones are about 30 lbs. of that weight. 170 lbs of the rest is "other stuff" but not bones. Saying you're big boned to gloss over being overweight is a an old wives tale. Just a myth that still around from when people knew little about human anatomy.
Well, I do think a wider frame may carry more muscle. Mine seems to. I mean, there are muscles connected the same way, and the frame is wider, so it seems like there is more area that is muscle than in a narrow person. So I think big-framed people usually legitimately weigh more than slighter-framed folks because of bones and muscle, like taller folks weigh more than short ones.
But that doesn't mean we have to look tubby. The goal weight may be hard to figure, but you still know when you get there like anyone else 0 -
cafeaulait7 wrote: »Your bones are about 15% - 20% of your weight. If you weigh 200 lbs. Your bones are about 30 lbs. of that weight. 170 lbs of the rest is "other stuff" but not bones. Saying you're big boned to gloss over being overweight is a an old wives tale. Just a myth that still around from when people knew little about human anatomy.
Well, I do think a wider frame may carry more muscle. Mine seems to. I mean, there are muscles connected the same way, and the frame is wider, so it seems like there is more area that is muscle than in a narrow person. So I think big-framed people usually legitimately weigh more than slighter-framed folks because of bones and muscle, like taller folks weigh more than short ones.
But that doesn't mean we have to look tubby. The goal weight may be hard to figure, but you still know when you get there like anyone else
@cafeaulait7 - I think that's why when looking at the BMI scale. People with broader frames are generally happier at the top end of healthy/low end of overweight while people with narrow frames tend to be happier closer to the low end of healthy.0 -
My mom always told me I was big boned too, it was just her trying to be nice and cover the fact that I was/am fat. I was in an almost identical situation as you, the OP, 5'9.5" and about 270lbs. As I struggled to figure out how much weight I was going to loose I looked at the BMI charts and thought and my wife politely agreed, that 170lbs, the first real healthy weight listed for someone of my height was unrealistic. now I am down to 178lbs, and while I am stalled currently I don't think even 160lbs would be out of the question for me. I still have quite a bit of fat around my chest, thighs and abdomen.
I guess what I am trying to say is IMO most of us chunky guys that were told we were big boned was just a lie to make us feel better. The BMI charts are completely realistic for 95% of the people out there and the only ones it isn't realistic for are the rare athlete like Dwayne Johnson or guys and gals that spend hours everyday doing strength training.0 -
Most everyone in my family was obese so it was not a big surprise that when I was around 12 or so that I was also heavy. I was always told I was big boned as well so as to make me not feel like all of my size was simply from my eating habits. In the summer between 7th and 8th grade though I really grew in height and was pretty active throughout high school and I recall in my senior year I was 6' and 185 pounds (183cm/84kg) and at that time, felt I could stand to lose maybe 10 pounds or so.
Forward 30 years and a lot of inactivity and a love of eating and nothing to stop me other than a lack of money at times (and even that didn't stop me sometimes) and I ballooned to a max weight of 387 pounds (175kg). Back problems and knee problems and a bit of a heart scare that turned out to be stress related and I knew I had to start getting it under control so I went to see a bariatric specialist for a non-surgical consultation. After assessing much of my family history and blood work and physical attributes it was determined that I have dysmetabolic syndrome, am insulin resistant and no surprise.... pre-diabetic. She asked me what I felt my weight should be and I talked about the 185 in high school but that I thought a more realistic number to shoot for would be in the 225 range. She did a simple wrist size test and agreed based on my bone structure. Basically I do have a larger frame and can hold more weight easier than someone with a smaller frame. "Big boned" but not in the way it normally is presented. She advised me to start on a high protein & low carb diet (160g protein and 50-100g of carbs as targets) and eating every 2 to 2 1/2 hours.
I live a very sedentary lifestyle right now. I drive a forklift at work all day, sit in a car to drive home, sit in front of the computer then lay in bed watching TV. We are holding off on the exercise at the moment until I get a some of the weight off and while it is the easy weight that is coming off, it is purely due to calorie deficits and having my body process more appropriate food and smaller portions.
It is a hassle because I LOVE food and high carb foods like breads and pasta and such but since my body handles it differently they are not good for me and certainly not in the levels I was eating them.
While I had started working on general portion control after the heart scare, by the time I went to the bariatric consultation I was at 368 back at the end of August. As of today I am at 340. Money is tight here too so I have had to work on some of the more inexpensive ways to eat healthier (though we are not paying attention to much other things like sodium and fat just yet).
It is boring but I spent a lot of time taking my "big boned" frame where it shouldn't be and now I have to pay the piper so to speak and keep working on the routine and making it "lifestyle change" rather than simply dwelling on it as a diet.
You may be in the same situation and I would highly recommend seeing a doctor if you can to try and understand what your blood and family history might be telling you to do. I am not sure where the OP is located (the kg/cm indicates it is not the US most likely LOL) so I am not sure what type of medical coverage you have to help with the costs. Bariatric surgeries can be very costly but for me, for the non-surgical route, it is simply a $15 office visit when I go in once a month.
While I am still in the very early stages of my weight loss, feel free to ask me anything relevant to my situation and I will be happy to answer if it helps.
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In these discussions, some people seem to fixate on the term "bone" to the exclusion of other factors. "Big boned" or "frame size" are really just euphemisms for someone with a larger than average inherent lean body mass. And lean body mass includes more than just bones. In the normal population, the range of LBM is fairly large--depending on someone's overall build, LBM can range 30-40 lbs for individuals of the same height. Which once again, demonstrates that BMI is useless as an individual evaluation measurement.
Someone's "ideal" body weight = their LBM + target body fat %. And for someone with a lot of weight to lose, LBM will change over time, so "ideal" weight is often a moving target.
OP: at your weight, the most important thing to focus on is the beginning of the journey, not the end. If you can stay with a consistent program, you will lose weight and your body will reshape itself. As time goes on, you can reassess your body composition with more accuracy and get a better sense of an appropriate weight goal.0 -
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Bone size has nothing to do with fat. You can be lean no matter how large your bone structure and you can be fat no matter how small. Big boned may be a reason to weigh more than someone else, but it's not a reason to be fatter.0
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It's a slow and steady process, but stick with it, and you can reassess as you begin to see results. For me, it was too overwhelming to think about my ultimate goal weight or total weight loss, so I just concentrate on the next 20 pounds and the next small fitness goal (walk a little further, lift a little more weight or a few more reps, add a new routine). Most of all, enjoy your new life and new habits! Wish you the best and keep us posted on how you are coming along!0
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pstegman888 wrote: »For me, it was too overwhelming to think about my ultimate goal weight or total weight loss, so I just concentrate on the next 20 pounds and the next small fitness goal
I think this is really important to those of us who have a very large amount of weight to lose. If you were 160 pounds in your prime and are now 410, it is easy to want to be there again but it certainly can be overwhelming to think about how long it will take.
In some ways it is like when I was in my early 20's and had friends that played in a band. It was cool and I decided I wanted to learn to play the electric guitar too. I mean, I watch musicians and it looks so easy and effortless and I am pretty smart so I figured this would be a breeze. Then I learned about how much it hurts your fingers in the beginning and how it isn't so effortless and I basically decided that if I can't be Eddie VanHalen in a few weeks, why bother and gave up. Getting too wrapped up in the end goal with regards to weight loss can have the same result for a lot of people. I have to remind me that I spent 30 years putting on that extra 202 pounds and while I don't feel it should take 30 years to get it off, I don't think it should be done by Christmas either.
So for me it was more a matter of "This is what I think a realistic end goal could be" and then enjoy different milestones. Currently for me it can be things like having the willpower to say no to things I love (like free pastries and candies when I am up in our offices at work) or buying donuts for the gang but not eating any despite my love of them. From a weight standpoint, 20 pounds was significant but I know how easy I could put that back on so as I approach 50 pounds (13% of my peak weight) that will be a big deal and beyond that, looking up at 300 again instead of down at it (something I haven't seen in around 9 years).
I think for me it is going to be a matter of not so much setting various goals to achieve but having them happen and then realizing that without even stressing on them, they were actually pretty significant. 0
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