How to deal with F.O.M.O? (Fear of Missing Out)

qstneverything

Hey guys,

So, when we decided to start this journey of losing weight, we accepted there would be certain sacrifices we have to make. But how do we deal with these sacrifices in the mean time?

Last night my housemates decided to go out to a party and have a big night. I stayed home because I didn't want to ingest calories and sugar in alcohol - I used to be the life of the party, by the way. I was in bed by 10pm after having a really healthy dinner.

This morning they're sitting in front of me bragging about how great their night was and sharing funny stories and anecdotes of the night before. Suddenly, the first loss on the scale in weeks doesn't seem so great anymore, and I feel really down that I missed out on fun.

Do these feelings go away? It's the first time I've turned down a party invite and it paid off (I have a loss) but I actually feel pretty bad.

shadowfax_c11

Find something fun to do that does not involve copious amounts of food and alcohol. That's actually more about growing up than it is about losing weight.

Don't see any reason to be afraid of missing out on getting drunk, damaging your body and feeling like total crap the next morning. How is that even fun?

Sabine_Stroehm

Do you feel like you miss out on things now, as an overweight person?

fiddletime

Go to the parties and get tonic water on ice with a piece of lime. Sip it. It looks like a gin and tonic. I actually am learning to like parties when I haven't been drinking. And after a few drinks your friends won't notice or care. The you can nibble a little food, count calories, AND have fun with your roommates.

arditarose

I learn to go to the parties and gatherings but drink less. I can make a drink stretch quite awhile now.


I also don't like socializing, people, or parties. So that makes it easier.

jenmovies

Can you compromise? Would you be able to fit in some wine or vodka into your calories/kilojoules? Sometimes when I go out on the weekend, I balance it. So if I have a decent meal then alcohol, I might eat less during the day or go for a huge workout. You can also eat much less the next day to compensate, within reason. If you miss out too much, you might just go back to 'f--k it, who cares' and end up gaining all the weight back. I'm the type of person who struggles with temptation too, but I think you can definitely still go out. Also, the tonic water thing is genius!
If you're worried about party snacks, try to start convos away from the snacks. If they aren't within reach, you're less likely to go to town on them! hehe

Machka9

shadowfax_c11 wrote: »

Find something fun to do that does not involve copious amounts of food and alcohol. That's actually more about growing up than it is about losing weight.

Don't see any reason to be afraid of missing out on getting drunk, damaging your body and feeling like total crap the next morning. How is that even fun?

+1

Get out there and get active ... go sky diving, go scuba diving, take dance classes, take art classes ... find other exciting and interesting things you enjoy doing.


And if you do go to the party ... this is good advice ...

fiddletime wrote: »

Go to the parties and get tonic water on ice with a piece of lime. Sip it. It looks like a gin and tonic. I actually am learning to like parties when I haven't been drinking. And after a few drinks your friends won't notice or care. The you can nibble a little food, count calories, AND have fun with your roommates.

I am not a drinker, never have been. And yes, I have been encouraged to drink for the first little while at a party, but it doesn't take long before the rest of them are half drunk and only focused on themselves. No one cares anymore that I'm drinking diet coke and not something stronger.

If it is a potluck thing (like a get together my husband and I went to a couple weekends ago), bring good choices. We brought a large veggie tray we had made up at a local deli. I spent a good portion of the evening nibbling veggies.

RodaRose

People make choices.

qstneverything

Thanks heaps for the advice/responses everyone, I'm glad people all had insightful things to say!

I went out today with my boyfriend, sister and brother in law and we had just a couple of wines and a nice meal (it's a public holiday in my city) although I had two wines, it was nice to hold back and not binge drink.

Also I got to talk to them about my dilemma, and we all came to the conclusion that one of my housemates was talking up the party last night to be spiteful. There's a bit of drama going on there at the moment, and this particular housemate is very spiteful about my weight loss. He's quite big himself and rapidly gaining more, and rather than doing anything about it he tries to always say things about the good food I eat (he always tries to say it's unhealthy, literally as he chomps down McDonalds every night) and this morning he tried to brag about what I missed out on, to make me feel bad that I chose a healthy night over a drunken one.

I feel loads better now. Thanks all

RodaRose

You are doing great. Stay focused on your own needs.

Machka9

qstneverything wrote: »

Thanks heaps for the advice/responses everyone, I'm glad people all had insightful things to say!

I went out today with my boyfriend, sister and brother in law and we had just a couple of wines and a nice meal (it's a public holiday in my city) although I had two wines, it was nice to hold back and not binge drink.

I feel loads better now. Thanks all

A public holiday involving a horse race?

I'm glad you're feeling better ... sometimes I think people do embellish what happens at parties. Often the real thing is just a lot of standing around.

Golda5775

Happy Melbourne cup day !! You're making great choices! Feel proud of yourself

NaimaTJama

qstneverything wrote: »

Hey guys,

So, when we decided to start this journey of losing weight, we accepted there would be certain sacrifices we have to make. But how do we deal with these sacrifices in the mean time?

Last night my housemates decided to go out to a party and have a big night. I stayed home because I didn't want to ingest calories and sugar in alcohol - I used to be the life of the party, by the way. I was in bed by 10pm after having a really healthy dinner.

This morning they're sitting in front of me bragging about how great their night was and sharing funny stories and anecdotes of the night before. Suddenly, the first loss on the scale in weeks doesn't seem so great anymore, and I feel really down that I missed out on fun.

Do these feelings go away? It's the first time I've turned down a party invite and it paid off (I have a loss) but I actually feel pretty bad.

You need to remind yourself as why you didn't go out in the first place. You have your whole life to party. And there will always be sceniros where you will not go out. And your house mates will have their turn on missing out on an event.

You have to reassure yourself that your health is the most important thing.

In fact you should be proud that you took control.
Seriously!