Breakup, Death, and getting back on track...

I broke up with my bf of 6 years a few months ago. I was devastated and had trouble eating. Then I'd binge on absolutely everything. It was really derailing my progress.

I started getting it together when my mom died unexpectedly. She wasn't even 50, super healthy, worked out every day. She just stopped breathing and we're still waiting to find out a cause, even though it's been 3 weeks. The autopsy ordered a toxicology so we won't know anything for 8-12 more weeks.

I'm pretty broken as a person and I don't care about anything anymore. I do want to get healthy again and try to get my life back together but I don't know where to start. I've been eating horribly and drinking almost daily. Not at an alcoholic level or anything, but it is still a lot of calories.

How can I get my life together? I don't want to work or do anything. I started back up at the gym last week, just forcing myself to go, but it's hard to be motivated. I am also already in therapy, which does help, but not enough.


  • klkarlen
    klkarlen Posts: 4,366 Member
    I don't have any words of wisdom, but wanted to express my condolences on the loss of your mother.

    I think just by reaching out here that you have taken the first step to getting back on track.
  • ms_smartypants
    ms_smartypants Posts: 8,278 Member
    I lost 4 people within 3 months of each other this year .... I took some time off and I was in a terrible funk but what helped me was to come on here and chat with friends or whatnot ....finally in August I told myself that the 4 people whom I lost wouldn't want me to give up on myself so I somehow got out of my funk and got back to logging and such ..... I am sorry you are going thru this trying time but do what you can start slow again and work your way up ....It will become easier ...hang in there and if you need someone to chat with or listen feel free to message me
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,696 Member
    I'm so sorry for your losses. You are in a grieving process. Don't force getting through it. Feel the feelings, as hard as they may be and give yourself time to grieve properly or else you'll be carrying that baggage the rest of your life. Eventually, the pain will subside and you'll have all the good memories to carry around with you.

    Sorry about your breakup. Hope it was for the best in the long run. I also hope they find the cause of death for your mother. You'll need that for closure (eventually).

    Just take it one day at a time. Eat as healthfully as you can, knowing it will keep you strong and give you energy. Don't dwell on the calorie content. Go for nutritious food to give you strength. Go to the gym if it is a healthy escape for you. Again, don't worry about your actual workout for now. Just move, be active and don't expect to feel motivated. You're just there to keep your body active and give your mind a break. Stick with it and keep posting and venting here if need be.
  • qtpurplebuble
    qtpurplebuble Posts: 2 Member
    I'm so sorry for your loss and the struggles you are currently going through. It is definitely going to take some time to heal, but if you would like I can add you as a friend and be a good support system when you need it. It's definitely hard to stay motivated and positive during troubled times, but reaching out is always a good start.
  • finnsgma
    finnsgma Posts: 55 Member
    So very sorry for your loss. I have never been through anything like that, but I am sure if your mother were here she would cheer you on and tell you to keep going and take care of yourself. Therapy will be a big help I am sure. Take time to grieve, but don;t lose yourself in the process.