Why do I always lose my motivation?!? HELP

shannashannabobana

Motivation is what gets you started, you need to develop a routine that works for you so it becomes a habit.

Absolutely!

I think it works best to work on one or two habits at a time at most. Willpower is a finite thing. Focus it on one or two things until they become deeply ingrained habit (maybe 6 weeks) and then move on to something else (continuing whatever you focused on because now they are just part of your life!).

I think when people burn out they've usually tried to do everything all at once and then they go off on one thing, feel guilty, and dump it all in frustration.

siremj

Hey girl,

Like she said below, try going into it small. To make a lifestyle change you can't just jump in full throttle. Your mind doesn't work that way. The moment you tell yourself "NO" to anything, you're just going to want it more. Like that cookie, watching that T.V. show instead of going to the gym, etc.

Its about little changes to start to see the big picture. Once you reach a point where you're voluntarily saying NO without hesitation, thats when you know you can start implementing other changes.

If food is the weakness, try looking up healthy versions of the things you eat.

Exercise, DO SOMETHING YOU ENJOY. Bike, dance (zumba), swim, run (although not many people find that fun), WHATEVER floats your boat. Motivation is all about a mindset, and for this sort of thing, a lifestyle change.

We're here to help! So when you're feeling weak or down, talk to us!

aliciamhosein

It can be hard to stay motivated. You can make yourself a dream board. Put anything that reminds you of your goal up on it and look at it every day. weight is a constant battle, you just have to find ways of reminding yourself why you want to lose it. buy a skinny outfit and hang it up at the front of your closet. I have my size zero jeans hanging up at the front of mine. If you make a mistake and give up for the day don't put yourself down! Restart your diet right away, instead of thinking you cant do it. we all make mistakes no one is perfect. another trick is always staying full. try splitting up your meals into 2 parts. when I wake up I have a yogurt, then later I have eggs. its never a bad idea to snack as long as its a healthy snack. YOU CAN DO IT!!!! just find the right tricks to remind yourself you can.

onwarddownward

Have you tried keeping a photo log? Every week, take a picture of yourself (my camera has a self timer, but a phone/mirror works just fine) in a pair of shorts and a sports bra. I do a front and a side photo. I print them out on my computer and put them in a binder. Being able to see the changes, to see how far I've come motivates me.

I do this too. And if you start feeling like giving up, look at your beginning shots again. I do mine in a bra and bikini underwear and at a starting weight of 294 ---- I get motivated when I see those before photos AND the current ones.

ctinawilson

I feel for you, as I have been in the same boat in the past.

I'll give you a few ideas that help keep me dedicated to my lifestyle now;

-Workout / shop / research all your new changes with a friend - hold each other accountable, get a little healthy competition going
-Go to pre booked, pre paid classes - its not just a workout you'll lose if you dont turn up, its your money too
-Tell as many people as you can (without sounding like a broken record) that you're changing your lifestyle. This should keep you going. In two weeks when they ask you how its going, you'll be able to honestly say its going really well, and they'll agree with you.
-Set yourself as many challenges as possible. Small things are great, but make big challenges too, put your name down for a race (do it for charity - that'll help with the motivation!)
-Join a club, running, hiking, swimming, anything active, the social element will help keep you dedicated
-Choose exercises you actually enjoy
-Get your partner / loved ones on board with your lifestyle - they dont have to join you, just get them to support you and hold you accountable - my boyfriend, although he's only joking around, makes a point of letting me know if I'm letting my chocolate habit get out of hand!

Hope this helps,
Christina

MinnieInMaine

You need to have a little heart to heart chat with yourself and really figure this out.

For me, the lightbulb really went off when one of my best friends asked me why my last diet (Atkins) didn't work out. At first I just blew the question off because that's in the past and why harp on it - but I couldn't get it out of my head. So I started thinking about what the common denominator was with all of my (many many many) diet attempts failing and finally realized it was deprivation. Every time I started a diet I was all gung ho about cutting out all these yummy foods I loved and trying to live on salads, diet products, frozen meal, etc - which I hate and leave me hungry. So I decided there was going to be no more of that. I eat what I love but make the healthiest choice I can and/or watch my portions. And I can't tell you how happy I am that it's working and I've been able to stick with it for 3+ years!!

Same goes with exercise. Are you starting out working out hard, way more than you usually do? It may feel great at first but you are going to burn yourself out eventually, especially if you're not eating enough calories and/or the right foods.

As other said, set small obtainable goals for each week/month. Set long term goals too so that you have something to keep you going. Have you filled out those sections on your profile page? If not, do it now. if so, maybe you need to tweak them a bit. I also strongly believe in setting fitness and nutrition goals instead of specific weight loss goals. If you're eating better and working out consistently, the weight loss will follow.

Best of luck!

kitka82

motivation is a strange thing. sometimes what motivated you last week won't motivate you this week.

now dedication is different. dedication gets you through a work out you really don't want to do. you tell yourself, this is happening.

set a goal. in my opinion, you should be training for a race. http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/Capt_Apollo/view/why-you-should-be-preparing-for-a-race-545663 find one in 6-8 months, and register. when you lose your motivation, you'll continue to stick to your program in order to perform at your race.

^^^THIS. Actually, this is how I intend to get my @$$ back in gear.

jkal1979

Instead of relying on motivation, be determined to reach your goals.

It might be a good idea to write down why you want to lose weight and write down your goals. Read them a couple times a day and when you feel like giving up. Doing this has really helped keep me focused and keep going even when I'm not feeling motivated.

Espressocycle

It often takes an addict 7 times to get clean and stay clean. I think it's that way with all sorts of things.

Tykk

First of all, if I had the answer to this, I'd be rich. Or at least I'd be a lot lighter.

But...

I found this book to be really interesting:

The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do To Get More of It

It looks at the neurological and psychological basis of willpower, and offers some practical tips:

-- Willpower is a finite resource. If you are trying to do too many things at once, you'll run out
-- Going too long between meals can actually shut down your pre-frontal cortex, the part of the brain that implements willpower
-- Physical exercise helps. Deep breathing exercises help. Meditation helps.

Personally I find it helpful to realize that this isn't all just lack of character (as a couple of the posters above are implying), but that neurochemistry plays a big role.

NYCNika

I look at it now as essential body maintenance.

You never go "I'm not motivated to brush my teeth or shower anymore, I'm just going to quit!"

Same goes with giving your body proper nutrition and exercising. Your body needs those things.

lilcassers

Hey!! I have noticed that I stay motivated when I have a support system. Do you have one? Friends or family?

conniemaxwell5

I found that just wanting to lose weight for me wasn't motivation enough. At the time I didn't like myself enough to want to do it for me. I had to change my motivation. I want grandchildren more than anything right now. When I'm finally blessed with them I want to be able to get down on the floor with them, run with them in the park, ride bikes with them, or anything else they want to do. My old self couldn't do that. My unborn grandchildren have become my motivation. Make your motivation something that focuses on something besides yourself - running a race, wearing a sexy outfit for your husband, running with your kids - whatever stirs you on the inside and makes you want to do it.

The beautiful thing is, once I got into the habit of going to the gym and challenging myself to do more and better every day, I began to like myself more and now although my first motivation is those grandkids, I want to do it for me too!

eddie8131

I believe in the "mental strength" model. That is, your self-control is a limited resource. It gets used up like fuel. When you have competing priorities, you only have so much strength or capacity to deal with everything. Anyways, to increase my mental strength, I've found that increasing my "self efficacy" really helps. Just a fancy schmancy term for "believing that you can complete tasks and reach a goal". I always fall off the wagon when I feel like it is hopeless. Remind yourself that it isn't hopeless. Good luck!

lilcassers

Are you making sure to switch up your routine daily or weekly? If I don't do this, I get so bored.

Jred36

A lot of great advice here. I can relate to the motivation. I think surrounding myself with people who won't let me slack off is what I need. Setting smaller goals this time instead of one ultimate goal. Someone said she me she wants to lose 10 pounds 8 times. I love that. Instead saying I have 80 pounds to lose, she set it into smaller goals. I am trying to keep a photo of myself when I was "skinny" to look at to help keep my motivation up.

traininglady911

take it slow.... I can't even do one day at a time. Sometimes it is one hour or even one minute at a time. If I sit here and think about food, I make myself get up and do something - anything - else. When my mind is off food, I can resist the temptation to eat something.

Jkellystyles

Food is tough! Its not like you can go without it and just quit like smoking or drinking. What has worked for me is finding exercise that I love. I run and hike. I picked up hot yoga and spinning is my new favorite cross training. once I saw the benefits of being more fit it got easier>

michellechawner

I'm not saying this to be rude, this is how I truly feel. You will never get thru this until you take charge and also take complete, and I mean absolute complete responsibility for it! You can't blame others, you can't make excuses, you have to be accountable to yourself to get this done!

^^ I completely agree with this - and i'm not trying to be rude either, but if you want it, you'll do it. If you don't want it, you'll find excuses not to achieve it. Simple as that.

LorinaLynn

People lose motivation simply because they not willing to do what it takes to achieve their ultimate goal . why? excuses and laziness . THAT SIMPLE

Actually, I think it's this kind of attitude that IS the problem. They go all out, and can't keep up that level of momentum. That's not laziness, that's just starting off with unrealistic expectations. And when they can't keep up with their expectations, they think they've already failed, then quit, rather than seeing if they just need to tweak their plan a little.

I think of it like remodeling your home. If you're already living in it, you can't just gut the whole thing and do it all at once. You have to go room by room. I couldn't go from a Hamburger Helper eating couch potato to a healthy eating runner and lifter in one go. I had to start small, and build up to it. Make small, sustainable changes, and add more small, sustainable changes as the other changes become habit.

Cassandra973

Find out what you really want from this weight loss and focus on that and how it would make you feel once you achieve it that what im doing

Cassandra973

People lose motivation simply because they not willing to do what it takes to achieve their ultimate goal . why? excuses and laziness . THAT SIMPLE

Actually, I think it's this kind of attitude that IS the problem. They go all out, and can't keep up that level of momentum. That's not laziness, that's just starting off with unrealistic expectations. And when they can't keep up with their expectations, they think they've already failed, then quit, rather than seeing if they just need to tweak their plan a little.

I think of it like remodeling your home. If you're already living in it, you can't just gut the whole thing and do it all at once. You have to go room by room. I couldn't go from a Hamburger Helper eating couch potato to a healthy eating runner and lifter in one go. I had to start small, and build up to it. Make small, sustainable changes, and add more small, sustainable changes as the other changes become habit.

i agree with lorinalynn

ladyjay71

It's very easy to lose momentum, I agree that a one day at a time approach is best but set some goals even if they are not related to the scale. I find myself being a slave to the scale sometimes but I'm trying to change my attitude. So small steps, set goals and do this for you and no one else.

kelseyhere

For me it's about keeping the foods I eat "clean", that means less sugar, no processed, no junk. When I eat that stuff, I start to binge. When I don't, I'm more in control. The food slows me down and leaves me without energy to work out. There is a book called "It Starts With Food" I would suggest reading. It helped me understand why I was stuck in negative cycles and how to start changing them.

jen_zz

A user on here suggested the blog run for cookies, and I came across her page about the difference between motivation and dedication. It's a great read -

http://www.runsforcookies.com/2012/01/difference-between-motivation-and.html

Chubby_never_again

The thing a lot of people don't realize that that motivation will ALWAYS fail eventually. But it's not motivation that gets you to the finish line. It's a willingness to make the choices you need to make whether you feel motivated or not. It's making the right choices when it gets really hard, which it inevitably will.

^ This!

Just remind yourself why you want/need to go through your journey and keep going!

karainfla

I have a few motivating factors. One is that I cannot fit properly in my scrubs for work. I really don't want to go and buy more. Secondly, in my line of work, I see a lot of heart disease. Eating the wrong foods and not exercising will eventually kill you. I know we all die sooner or later, but I have seen too many people suffer from their own choices. I haven't been making good food choices and have chalked it up to stress. I don't smoke, have never done drugs, and I rarely drink alcohol. My drug of choice is food. It's amazing how the brain pleasure pathways act towards food. It works the same as drugs. Lastly, I am going on a vacation with my family next year. We're going on a cruise, and I'm so excited about it. I want to have the energy to participate in all of the running around we are going to do. I also want to look good in our family photos.

_HeartsOnFire_

Do you enjoy your workout routine? What all workouts have you tried? The best thing I can say is find things you enjoy doing and focus on that! If you like dancing, try Just Dance 3 on the Wii - it has an exercise program in the game. Do you have a better time if you are walking with a friend? A dog? Is there something you are training for?

I was in a rut and had lost my motivation, then I made myself sign up for this www.rocrace.com. 22 others have signed onto my team. We are doing team training events. The training routine we came up with may suck (as in it kicks our *kitten*, eff some push ups, etc...), but the fact that I am leading these people with the help of a co-captain, keeps me going.

You need to find what you enjoy doing. Make it into an activity.

ninerbuff

TRUE motivation doesn't stop anyone from achieving what they really want. You may have a strong desire, but it's not the same a truly being motivated. Excuses and obstacles become non existent.
People don't motivate, they inspire. The greatest motivator in the world can't motivate someone who isn't willing to get the job done.

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

kazaroona

Motivation is what gets you started, you need to develop a routine that works for you so it becomes a habit. Working out is part of my morning routine just like showering, brushing my teeth, etc. In the beginning when it wasn't a habit I had alerts on my email that said it's workout time, and I treated them like I would any other important meeting. I put them in there as goals I still do that this weeks goal was to ride 30 miles on my bike, now I have 2 weeks to get to 35 miles.

As for nutrition part of it, because I don't deprive myself of anything that isn't hard to continue, I just cut back how much I eat of it.

I'm glad I read this thread, this is EXACTLY what I needed to read and need to do. I start off motivated to lose weight and get fit as I hate what I see, then it dwindles down unless I have something big like my wedding! I need to make it a habit.