Weight Loss For Love

lucille_heather

Newly single now for about a month, and ready to start dating. But need to get the confidence back. What better way then toning up and losing a bit more weight. Anyone else in the same boat as me?
xo

tbrain1989

i honestly think i lost my last relationship based on my body changes,


now i know that im not that shallow, but its easy to see that the current social trend is attraction to physicality, particularly weight,

i went from muscular, 6-pack, realy v-shaped to basically flabby with love handles etc . cant blame someone for no longer finding that attractive.

So yeh my main motivation is to be attractive (more attractive)

does it mean thats how i view members of the opposite sex? aboslutely not,

great topic though, i hope more people express their views

lucille_heather

I totally agree with you. Looks are counting for more now.
I did my Psychology University dissertation on this, and attractiveness was defiantly more needed than personality in my results. Sad really!
Aww babe some people are really shallow though.
Thanks I hope so too! Would love to speak to people in the same boat

mutley1971

One of the reasons for losing weight here

lucille_heather

awww same babe Biggest motivation for me

Chadomaniac

Initially its common to have some form of physical attraction , BUT what women forget Is that every single one of us have personal preference , just because the media says skinny is sexy doesn't mean skinny IS sexy . Personally Im more attracted to "curves" I think its lady like and sexy. SO women , get the idea out of your head that you need to be perfect , because we all have different perceptions of PERFECT

_Moose51_

Initially its common to have some form of physical attraction , BUT what women forget Is that every single one of us have personal preference , just because the media says skinny is sexy doesn't mean skinny IS sexy . Personally Im more attracted to "curves" I think its lady like and sexy. SO women , get the idea out of your head that you need to be perfect , because we all have different perceptions of PERFECT

This ^^^^

fitgirlandfoodie

I'm in the same boat, ex broke up with me about a month ago..I had been losing weight for 6 months before I met him, and kept it up while we were together, but it's definitely motivation to keep going now that I'm single again. Not even just to attract someone, but to have confidence in myself and know that I have the discipline and drive to get back after a knock.

nope31

Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later baby, Yeahhhhhhh

tbrain1989

Initially its common to have some form of physical attraction , BUT what women forget Is that every single one of us have personal preference , just because the media says skinny is sexy doesn't mean skinny IS sexy . Personally Im more attracted to "curves" I think its lady like and sexy. SO women , get the idea out of your head that you need to be perfect , because we all have different perceptions of PERFECT

we absolutely have a variety of tastes, but it is the fact that a physical taste exists that means people have to adhere too something to be attractive.

Also, i find that people with similar interests both socially, culturally and academically tend to expect a similar body image to themselves

for example; people who enjoy an active lifestyle find those who are fitter (physically-sporty looking) more attractive because they are subconsciously judging whether that potential partner could take part in the activities of their lives.

i know thats a massive generalisation and i cue the exceptions to the rule.

lucille_heather

I agree it is down to preference. I think for women its more skinny = confidence though.
Ive got the typical Kim Kardashian body shape, and although men love curves, Id feel more confortable being less curvy.
Another reason us women are so difficult! haha.
Most lads I know always say they love curvy girls but then always go for skinny small girls too.

SteveStedge

Newly single now for about a month, and ready to start dating. But need to get the confidence back. What better way then toning up and losing a bit more weight. Anyone else in the same boat as me?
xo

I think you need to be alone for a while and find out who you are. You are obviously a very attractive girl but don't seem to have confidence...I think the confidence you're looking for won't come from working out. It's called SELF-confidence for a reason.

Yes attractiveness gets a man's attention. But you know what is very UNattractive to men? Shallow people or girls obsessed with their looks who take 2 hours to get ready to go anywhere, who are always digging for ego boosting comments, looking for other men's attention, insecure about body in bed, drama, ..all that gets old real fast. So unless I'm missing something your outward appearance isn't really a problem...

tbrain1989

I'm in the same boat, ex broke up with me about a month ago..I had been losing weight for 6 months before I met him, and kept it up while we were together, but it's definitely motivation to keep going now that I'm single again. Not even just to attract someone, but to have confidence in myself and know that I have the discipline and drive to get back after a knock.

*faith lost in society* - if your struggling, being as good looking as you are, no chance for the average

tbrain1989

I agree it is down to preference. I think for women its more skinny = confidence though.
Ive got the typical Kim Kardashian body shape, and although men love curves, Id feel more confortable being less curvy.
Another reason us women are so difficult! haha.
Most lads I know always say they love curvy girls but then always go for skinny small girls too.

to echo a lot of the comments on here,

self confidence is attractive, if your not happy with yourself (regardless of reasoning) then you ned to address that, then once you stop worrying, im sure "mr right" will turn up.

*cliche's like "mr right" make me feel ill

lucille_heather

Newly single now for about a month, and ready to start dating. But need to get the confidence back. What better way then toning up and losing a bit more weight. Anyone else in the same boat as me?
xo

I think you need to be alone for a while and find out who you are. You are obviously a very attractive girl but don't seem to have confidence...I think the confidence you're looking for won't come from working out. It's called SELF-confidence for a reason.

Yes attractiveness gets a man's attention. But you know what is very UNattractive to men? Shallow people or girls obsessed with their looks who take 2 hours to get ready to go anywhere, who are always looking for ego boosting comments, looking for other men's attention..all that gets old real fast. So unless I'm missing something your outward appearance isn't really a problem...

I have the confidence I need to date, its just when you feel better about your body, you feel better on the INSIDE.
And girls who take 2 hours to get ready, proves to me that they take care of their appearance.
My opinion though....

lucille_heather

I agree it is down to preference. I think for women its more skinny = confidence though.
Ive got the typical Kim Kardashian body shape, and although men love curves, Id feel more confortable being less curvy.
Another reason us women are so difficult! haha.
Most lads I know always say they love curvy girls but then always go for skinny small girls too.

to echo a lot of the comments on here,

self confidence is attractive, if your not happy with yourself (regardless of reasoning) then you ned to address that, then once you stop worrying, im sure "mr right" will turn up.

*cliche's like "mr right" make me feel ill

I agree babe, it makes you happier. And thats what everyone wants Totally agree with you
hahaha i love the mr right cliches! Too cute

tbrain1989

I agree it is down to preference. I think for women its more skinny = confidence though.
Ive got the typical Kim Kardashian body shape, and although men love curves, Id feel more confortable being less curvy.
Another reason us women are so difficult! haha.
Most lads I know always say they love curvy girls but then always go for skinny small girls too.

to echo a lot of the comments on here,

self confidence is attractive, if your not happy with yourself (regardless of reasoning) then you ned to address that, then once you stop worrying, im sure "mr right" will turn up.

*cliche's like "mr right" make me feel ill

I agree babe, it makes you happier. And thats what everyone wants Totally agree with you
hahaha i love the mr right cliches! Too cute

i do think you seem quite content with the path you want to be on, i think your OP was a little off the cuff withemotion but you seem to have your head and heart in a similar place.

one of my favourite passages on here ive ever Read, (dont ask me where it was, it was a while ago)

"its not about trying to be the best there ever was , the thinnest there ever was or winning the world over with your achievements. Its about being the BEST possible version of YOU. That way only you know if youve made it"

my own version: (which is my desktop screen saver)

to become the person you wanted to be is harder then you could have imagined, takes longer then you could estimate. Ultimately no one else knows if you ever become the person you wanted to be and only YOU know if the person youve become is the one you WANT

lucille_heather

I agree it is down to preference. I think for women its more skinny = confidence though.
Ive got the typical Kim Kardashian body shape, and although men love curves, Id feel more confortable being less curvy.
Another reason us women are so difficult! haha.
Most lads I know always say they love curvy girls but then always go for skinny small girls too.

to echo a lot of the comments on here,

self confidence is attractive, if your not happy with yourself (regardless of reasoning) then you ned to address that, then once you stop worrying, im sure "mr right" will turn up.

*cliche's like "mr right" make me feel ill

I agree babe, it makes you happier. And thats what everyone wants Totally agree with you
hahaha i love the mr right cliches! Too cute

i do think you seem quite content with the path you want to be on, i think your OP was a little off the cuff withemotion but you seem to have your head and heart in a similar place.

one of my favourite passages on here ive ever Read, (dont ask me where it was, it was a while ago)

"its not about trying to be the best there ever was , the thinnest there ever was or winning the world over with your achievements. Its about being the BEST possible version of YOU. That way only you know if youve made it"

my own version: (which is my desktop screen saver)

to become the person you wanted to be is harder then you could have imagined, takes longer then you could estimate. Ultimately no one else knows if you ever become the person you wanted to be and only YOU know if the person youve become is the one you WANT

I like that quote. I can totally relate to it. Its defiantly all about trying to be the best you can be

sam308lbs

get a room you two!:grumble:

lucille_heather

get a room you two!:grumble:

hahahaha bless you. get anger management help!:laugh:

bagge72

I think one of the most annoying things I see is my friends who only lose weight when they are single, and as soon as they are in a relationship they let themselves go. If you want to be a little bit out of shape then just stay that way, and find somebody who likes you for who you are, and not 100% how you look, and if you want to be in shape because it makes you feel good then just do that for you not so you can get a date. To many people out there trying to trick people into thinking they look a certain way.