So I would really like advice from others who deal with the same thing I am

xoxogreta

I know exactly what you are going through (way too well). Just know it will get better. The first thing that helped me take a step in the right direction was acknowledging that I couldn't live like that anymore--in fact, it was causing me so much emotional distress it would make me binge out even more. I knew that I couldn't base each and every day of my life around binges. It soon got extremely tiring. It got to the point where I would sneak foods into my room, hide them in my closet, under my bed, or I would go into the kitchen really late at night and steal food while everyone else in my house was sleeping. I noticed I was putting on a lot of weight and it made me hate myself. I would always be thinking about food, always not able to control my eating, and I always felt miserable, desperate, and unordinary. I looked around at everyone near me and I saw them eating happily--especially the thinner ones--and I was wondering how on earth they could be that skinny while eating and not tempted to eat more than a single portion because I was having no success after many attempts at "watching" what I ate and would often go overboard with my eating and out of control.
Until one day I decided to change, as I knew something needed to. After binging the morning of Thanksgiving, knowing that I wouldn't be able to binge later in the evening because family would be over, then eating a lot of food at the actual Thanksgiving party, I felt so sick. I went to bed with an extremely full stomach, knowing that it would be digested in the morning for more binging sessions (like the usual). When I woke up, my stomach was still SO full. Keep in mind, even after 12 hours, it felt like I had just binged. I was feeling nauseous and almost felt like I wanted to throw up. I had things to do that day as well, and my digestion/stomach problems from the large binge the day before wasn't helping. This was the major turning point for me. I (finally) realized that binging was interfering my quality of life. As I walked down the aisles of the grocery store that day feeling bloated as ever, I felt like I had the word "shame" branded onto my forehead. I felt like I had "I'm a fat pig, I just binged" taped onto my shirt. I felt DISGUSTING. And I guess that was enough to work towards changing my disordered eating habits and (at least) trying to start afresh.
**It would be helpful to note that before I was binging/restricting I was full on restricting. About five months ago, I would restrict my calories to very, very, little throughout the day over the course of two months (800cal/day). Those days I was at my thinnest. My body couldn't take restricting anymore so I started to get these extreme cravings that I couldn't resist. My first binge session was two months into basically starving myself and it lead to SO MANY MORE. I was soon binging every single day (sometimes every other day if I tried to "stop," which only lead to an even bigger binge session the next day) for three months. I gained so much weight and was at my highest weight ever. I went from one extreme to the other: from starving myself to eating 3000+ calories per day. I was the most depressed in my life (and looked the worst I have in my life) and my body couldn't take it all anymore. I had to work to get over the "good" and "bad" foods mindset as well as the mindset that I couldn't eat over 500 calories per day (which ironically turned into 3000+ calories from a binge caused by my restriction mindset). I found out the cause of my binging episodes was because I wasn't eating enough (then binging later or the very next day) and I was focusing on restricting my calories. I would also suggest getting down to the root of your disordered eating. What emotions are causing these episodes? I know a hard one for me was not only the restriction of my calories, was my self-hate drove me into eating more and more. Counter-intuitive, but that's basically what binging is. Learn to love yourself SO MUCH that you want to lose weight the HEALTHY WAY and KEEP IT OFF. It doesn't happen overnight, but as each night passes, you will wake up in the morning SO much happier. **

Here's what I want you to take from this (at the least):
-Let your body guide you to the acceptance of your disordered eating. My body couldn't handle restricting or binging any longer (from being dizzy, nauseous, and cranky to bloating, constipation/loose stools (sorry for the TMI), and lack of energy/initiative to do ANYTHING. Once your body is ready to change, lead your mind to accept that change needs to happen in order to prevent your body from giving out on you again.
-DO NOT RESTRICT CALORIES OR LABEL FOODS TO BE "GOOD" OR "BAD." Set a APPROPRIATE calorie goal and eat WHATEVER you WANT (still try to add in healthful foods, though. Obviously, do not eat junk food for every single meal) for however many meals you want, as long as you are meeting your calorie goal at the end of the day and not going too much over. I would recommend setting this calorie goal at your maintenance amount for however long you need, just to let your body recover from the binging. It takes a larger toll on your body than you think (and hopefully soon you will realize the havoc it is wreaking on your body...It will also help you get used to a NORMAL and HEALTHY eating pattern--eating spread out throughout the day whenever you are starting to get hungry--rather than eating two days worth of food in one sitting. Once you are used to eating "normal," then you can lower your calorie goal by 100-300 calories. This way, you are losing enough weight to feel good, but not too much that you are getting cravings from restriction. Remember: good things don't come overnight. Be patient. This will especially help you heal mentally as well.
-LOVE the PROCCESS. I know I have such a far way to go with my own journey, but I really hope this helps you. I have changed so much (and you will start to as well, even the first few days of "normal" eating you'll feel AMAZING). Know that as the days move on you keep feeling better and better. There are some days where you may eat a little over your calorie goal (or even a lot over), but that doesn't mean you are "relapsing." As long as your mindset is in the right place, "normal" overeating won't set you farther away from your goals. Just work on your mindset, as your mentality is key in recovery. Good luck, feel free to message me if you have any questions xx

zoeysasha37

Op, if you truly have a binge eating disorder then picking an overly restrictive diet probably isn't for you. For many that truly have binge eating disorders, this just leads them to continue the binge / restrict cycle. ( the term gets thrown around here so loosely most just don't know moderation and don't truly have a binge eating disorder) When foods are off limits, some want them even more and then end up over eating them . it becomes a vicious cycle.
That's why I believe learning things like portion control, moderation are important. ( for people with true binge eating disorder , therapy is a good idea . Its a good idea to explore what is causing you to do this and other ways to cope with stress ) Overly restrictive diets don't teach these things instead they focus on eliminating them completely. ( for Me, I couldn't imagine not having treats so moderation works best for me . I have a serving of ice cream every single night. I learned portion control so am able to enjoy a serving now without eating the entire container )
So op, if you truly have a binge eating disorder then getting some professional help is where to start. Then work on learning tools like portion control and moderation.

zoeysasha37

usmcmp wrote: »

bethclabburn wrote: »

It's all about your mind set. You have to think 'do I want that cookie or do I want to see results' you need to stop seeing food as a pleasure and to see it as fueling your body. You aren't eating this diet food for it to taste good, you're eating it see results.

There's times I could just sit and so much cheese and cake but I don't because I want results, the reason I'm unhappy and turn to food is because of the way I look so just to break that is a huge step

I find exercising really helps and drinking plenty of water, I mean litres of it.

Besides after working so hard why would you want to ruin it just for a biscuit or some chocolate.

Trust me it's not worth it, the human body is capable of incredible things just push yourself

Actually, the type of restriction you are talking about is detrimental to binge eaters. I say this as a binge eater who finally has it under control because I stopped restricting like you are suggesting. Another diet or rigid rules compounds binge eating and keeps the person in a binge and restriction cycle.

This. I do not believe in extreme restriction ,it often sets people up for failure. I think learning how to have cookies in moderation is a better way for long term success.

PeachyCarol

In a thread I posted a while back, I linked to current thinking in the scientific community on the behavioral aspects of eating addiction.

The issue seen as most likely to be what lead to addictive behavior? Binge/restrict cycles. (Please note, IIRC, this was a pattern of behavior separate from true Binge Eating Disorder.)

For some people, restriction is simply the WORST thing they can do.

Zoejohnse91

Stress eater here! Drinking a pint if sugar free squash has curbed my binging but I still allow for a snack size chocolate

Livgetfit

Oh yes, I understand. Totally. I am 5'3 and got to 213lb/97kg by 20 from eating this way. I am now 67kg/148lb, healthy and happy after 6.5 years.

Here is 6.5 years worth of lessons:

1. Don't (just) treat the symptom, treat the cause. Why do you eat like this? Is it learned behaviour? (In my case it was, my mother ate like that so I ate like that). Is food a reward & the enemy depending on the day? Consider counselling as you don't have to do this alone. Friend me & I'll happily be a soundboard.
2. Identify your triggers using mindfulness In addition to logging everything keep a diary, written or on your phone with the time it happens. If you want to binge or find yourself buying the big bag of chips, just take a moment to sit in silence and ask yourself: what else is happening around me or in my mind right now? Write this down as the patterns can empower you. The times will also allow you to see if you are putting yourself at risk of a binge by being hungry at a high risk time.
3. Eat without distractions or rituals Do you enjoy your favourite show with a snack? Do you read the news on your phone while you eat your breakfast? Do you reward good behaviour or achievements with eating? This has to stop in order for you to be mindful as you eat.
4. Eat the best thing first This is a random observation but I have found that people who eat like you & I will often address a plate of food in a certain way: the "best" thing on the plate, the "least favourite" and the stuff in between. Do you eat as the "best" after you've eaten everything else? This enforces an idea of clearing your plate as necessity as well as punishing yourself with things you don't like to get to the thing you do. If you do this, address it. It has helped me enormously.
5. Food is fuel: Now I'm not saying, stop enjoying food. Food is amazing. Tastes & textures are wonderful. But what is the primary reason we eat? To fuel our bodies to go about life. When I mentally associate food with comfort, I remind myself of this and it truly helps.
6. Love & educate thy self: My emotive eating was as a result off 3 things: a learned behaviour (addressed above), a lack of education on portion sizes and nutrition & issues with self-esteem. Grow a hunger for dietary knowledge! In turn, grow your love of yourself. We will never treat our body's as they deserve unless we respect and love them. I have at times kept a journal where I write 2-3 things every day that I like about myself (body or soul), I find walking hqas helped me enormously because it is time I can process my thoughts but is also a time I devote to myself as I deserve it. You deserve love, you have it in you - just release it to yourself & let the healing begin!

I wish you luck and love. I'm here if you want to talk.

Liv

glow_worm_eyes

AlabasterVerve wrote: »

That drive to eat and keep eating was a physical thing for me. A fairly strict low carb, high fat whole food based diet switched it off like a light switch. Over the years I've found exercise and periodic fasting to be helpful as well -- especially around the holidays when I indulge in foods that cause cravings and an insatiable appetite. But mainly I need to eat LCHF diet in order to have a normal appetite.

Me too. I think it's human nature to eat one cookie and then want more....and more. This was the case for me. I used to have treats here and there but it would turn into a feeding frenzy. I just had to ask myself,do you want to be fat, or do you wanna keep eating junk. I'm not the type that can eat a little and move on. My body goes crazy with sugar and carbohydrates so the diet change was key. Plus I read a book called "Brain over Binge." The author of the book really puts this into perspective from her point of view. I suggest it.

ninerbuff

bethclabburn wrote: »

It's all about your mind set. You have to think 'do I want that cookie or do I want to see results' you need to stop seeing food as a pleasure and to see it as fueling your body. You aren't eating this diet food for it to taste good, you're eating it see results.

There's times I could just sit and so much cheese and cake but I don't because I want results, the reason I'm unhappy and turn to food is because of the way I look so just to break that is a huge step

I find exercising really helps and drinking plenty of water, I mean litres of it.

Besides after working so hard why would you want to ruin it just for a biscuit or some chocolate.

Trust me it's not worth it, the human body is capable of incredible things just push yourself

This actually isn't the approach you'd use with a binge eater. Sorry.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition