People Distancing From You

kjfhw

I am steadily losing weight. I still have much further to go. But it is becoming evident to all because of the comments I receive daily. My question is this - has anyone experienced close(r) type friends distancing themselves from you since you have lost quite a bit of weight? I have a couple of people that have been very important to me in my life that do not call or pursue our relationship as in the past. I am beginning to feel a little isolated and it makes me feel sad. I NEVER talk about the fact that I am trying to lose nor do I bring anything else up in any regards to my success and they have never mentioned that they notice my weight loss.

pislari_poljnamd

True friends always support you...
Don't ever give up! You're beautiful, strong person. I'm sure there are plenty of people who would love to have you as a friend! X

seltzermint555

Sometimes it happens. I think most often (and most dramatically) it happens when people are very preachy and obnoxious about their lifestyle change, but that does NOT sound like it fits you at ALL. I think some people are jealous and/or frustrated at their own attempts to lose weight which may not have been so successful thus far. I also think some people are in a very dark place regarding their own body image and believe others are judging them negatively. I have been there to a much smaller extent when I was at my heaviest...I didn't drop any friends who were eating healthy and losing weight, but I DID distance myself a little bit from those who were constantly discussing their workouts and highly specific diets. It just made me feel uncomfortable and put such a focus on weight and bodies, which was the last thing I wanted. However...I understand that even those of us (myself included) who really don't bring up these topics AT ALL around friends...sometimes still experience this sort of thing. I have an old friend, not super close, but someone I've known and liked since teens (now almost 40) and she and I were always the 2 heaviest among our peers and now I've lost a very large amount of weight she avoids me and makes odd comments (never rude, but still uncomfortable), and confided in another friend that she can't stand coming out with those of us who are "skinny". That makes me sad because I'm definitely not skinny...most of us range from size 8-20 and this girl's probably a size 26/28. Anyway...there is not a lot you can do, it's usually their problem to get past, sadly...

queenliz99

Maybe they are worried and think you are sick.

kjfhw

I appreciate you all taking time to comment. Thank you.

PowerKickChic

You might want to put this in the support section of the website because this area is suppose to be about success stories.
I haven't experienced anyone distancing themselves from me, actually the opposite. For some reason everyone is nicer to people who weigh less. Its sad but true. I also found that people think it was easy or I was "lucky". Almost like I stumbled upon a miracle diet or pill. When I tell them I lost my weight thought 2 hours at the gym 5 days a week and eating healthy, they became a lot less interested haha!

thereshegoesagain

Maybe you could try talking to one of them. Tell her that you feel a distance and miss the friendship. Explain that you are working very hard to improve your health and you would love their support. If it goes well with one, chances it will with the others
And if they can't support you, perhaps they really weren't meant to be in your life long term. Good luck, I hope they come around for you.

RodaRose

What comments do you receive?
I am sorry that you are going through this.

caperchick78

Are your friends engaged in activities that support a healthy lifestyle? When I lost weight about 15 years ago, I had a best friend who was not supportive because she was still bigger and was not interested in being active with me. It's just a thought. The best thing to do is ask your friends if there's anything wrong and be honest about feeling isolated from them. I'm sorry you're feeling that.