Anxiety, Panic Attacks, Insomnia, Depression, and Seizures

pointkoala

I've been dealing with the above issues for my entire life but they have gotten much worse in the past few months (since August). I work 50 hours a week and I'm exhausted. My mind is exhausted as well. I get home and I just lie on my bed because I'm so tired. I'm VERY lucky that I have a partner who has been doing like 80% of the housework for me because he understands what I'm going through.
I'm seeing a therapist, various doctors, I want to get on medication that can help me get rid of all these things.
I don't do impulsive eating nearly as much as I did before. Apparently that goes hand-in-hand with anxiety and panic attacks so I am trying to control that much more.
In June-July (ish), I lost 10 lbs. I was so proud of myself. I was so happy. But then we moved into a house and I stopped keeping track of things and then my life went even more downhill in August.
I want to gain my self esteem back though. I don't want to look at myself at the chubby woman. I'm not huge my any means. But I'm more than I want to be. I want to lose like 30 lbs. I think that would make me feel better.
I guess I'm more looking for exercises that I can handle. Everything just seems like so much work because of my ridiculous mental issues. I used to hoop (hula hoop) which was great. I need other things that I can do. Even small things. Anything to help my self esteem and help me do a bit. I do squats and situps. I live in Canada so it's winter most of the time and I can't go on my daily walks like I used to in the two months of summer that we have.
Any advice on some things I can do?
I hope I don't get judged for being lazy.... I try.... I try to hoop when I can... and I do my situps and squats every day... I'm trying to get it in my head that yes a mental illness is real.... I'm not just a lazy person.... and I do want to try!!!!! But running marathons or something crazy like that, that just isn't me.

bri170lb

I think you should set a small goal for yourself and work on it til it becomes a habit, then add another small goal and another. That way you wont be overwelmed by trying to do too much when your energy is in short supply. Focus on what's most important and work up from there.

tapirfrog

Do you have a psychiatrist who can get you medicated and tweak the medications till they work? That's the most important thing. You won't accomplish much until that happens. It's like trying to drive along a freeway when your car radiator is leaking. You can make "brrrrm" sounds with your lips all you want, but eventually they won't cover up the sound of your car rolling to a stop on the side of the road ...

I'm very, very sorry you're facing these issues. I am too, except for the seizures. Most of the time I feel worthless because my partner is the one who does 90% of the housework. At least I'm the one bringing in the paycheck. If I get laid off, it would be better if we were divorced or I were dead so his retirement fund didn't get depleted. (For those of you saying "Oh, come on, it wouldn't be better if you were dead," I ... never mind. Just never mind.)

pandabear_

Are you on medication for anxiety/depression? I also suffered from anxiety/depression, I started taking medication for it and eventually started to feel myself. I think until that was sorted, all worries would stop me from exercising or even counting calories. I think it takes time to find right dosage/drug for you. As for the seizures, I also had them and my sister very badly. I was luckily prescribed a drug called Keppra. My sister wasn't, but eventually convinced the doctor to change her to it. Apparently doctors don't want to prescribe it because it's expensive and so they try everything else first. I know it's difficult but maybe you could talk to your doctor if you're not on that one? Maybe it's something they just didn't want to try yet.

I also tried to do inside exercises/running and a doctor said to me, that was good for for my depression, but actually not that great for my anxiety because I was doing it alone and not socialising. Is it possible for you to try gym classes?

pointkoala

I've been trying various medications for anxiety. Cipralex, effexor, cymbalta..... none worked. Just went to the doctor today who have me zoloft... crossing my fingers that this one works. I didn't throw up when I took it so that's a good sign.
For seizures, I can't get on meds for that yet because we have to do more tests to confirm that's what it really is (bla bla, just gotta go through the process).
I really hate exercising in public, I'd really rather do it at home.
I'm hoping the zoloft helps and maybe I will have normal energy levels after that.

I'd like to get a referral to a psychiatrist or neurologist but still waiting on those. Sigh. It takes too long :-(

Thanks everyone. One step at a time :-)

RodaRose

Walk away the pounds programs-- Leslie Sanson (sp?) Dvd to do at home.
Also various "Body weight" programs on YouTube you can do at home.

shelleysykeskeene

I get panic attacks and I have generalized anxiety disorder and depression - have had for over 10 years now.

I am on an anti depressant called Leximal (Essitalopram) to treat it, but by far what worked for me was going to cognitive behavior therapy. This teaches you the tools to cope properly (without pills) when an attack is imminent or when you are going through an attack by means of breathing, visualization and affirmations. I know it sounds lah di dah but it seriously works. Without this therapy I would probably still be getting major attacks.

Also try taking a probiotic - most of your seritonin is actually found in the gut which is why you throw up or get a runny tummy when you are anxious - which again throws your gut flora out of wack.

The other big thing is to exercise - you tube has some amazing videos you can do at home, some of them are

Popsugar fitness
Fitness blender
Jillian Micheals 30 day shred

All of these need little or no equipment and are great for beginners and advanced. And honestly exercise helps to lift mood and curb panic attacks - cardio especially is beneficial.

As for your seizures - you must check that out. Could it be a side effect of the meds? A symptom of your panic? I get terrible brain fog and then bad dizzy spells which lead to fainting when I am under stress! But you need to rule out Epilepsy.

Feel free to add me if you need a friend who also gets anxiety attacks - unless you have had one trust me no on understands!!

13bbird13

bri170lb wrote: »

I think you should set a small goal for yourself and work on it til it becomes a habit, then add another small goal and another. That way you wont be overwelmed by trying to do too much when your energy is in short supply. Focus on what's most important and work up from there.

I think this is great advice. Achieving small goals will make you feel better about yourself without adding to your feelings of being overwhelmed from trying to take on one more thing. It's definitely not "laziness".

I experienced depression and anxiety due to family issues for the better part of a year, and I'm pleased to say that it's possible to come out the other side feeling like your old self again. Counseling helped me get things more organized and prioritized and clear in my own mind; I'd recommend giving it a try.

I only get panic attacks when I fly, so that's not a daily problem for me. I've had great success with Atavan on the rare occasions when I do need to fly, but I don't know how it would work for chronic issues.

pointkoala

It's nice to have such an understanding and non-judgemental community here!
I haven't been consistently on meds but I know a lot of anxiety meds cause seizures. I am going to try Zoloft soon. I tried one pill and it didn't make me super sick so I'm going to try that for a bit. And I just saw online that my MRI results for the seizures are in so hopefully I will get a call from the doctor to go in soon to see about that.
I'm wondering how related the seizures and panic attacks are. Especially the absence seizures. Partial seizures are very different but absence seizures seem very very similar to panic attacks.
I am also seeing a therapist who does some CBT I am hoping this therapist helps me!
I will try out some of those exercise videos! I am hoping the Zoloft helps gain my energy back by relieving anxiety so that I actually have some energy in the evenings. It is just so hard to have TIME in the mornings to do exercise when you have to leave at 7 or 7:30 to go to work
Hearing that others have gone through depression and anxiety and that it has been successful is really good to hear. I was very depressed in high school (near suicidal really) and overcame that. Now it's back when I'm 25 years old and in a really good place in my life. Who knows why, really.

pointkoala

Ohhhh probiotics are mostly in yogurt and dairy products! I don't know much about them but I'm actually vegan so definitely not getting them through yogurt and stuff like this. My partner takes some probiotic supplements that aren't completely vegan but it's because he doesn't eat yogurt, dairy, etc. and needed them when he was taking antibiotics or something like that. Hmmm. I could look into those too!

zoeysasha37

Mental illness is 100% real and I feel for you. I would start by setting small weekly goals. Like walk around the block three times. After you complete your task, mark it off on a chart. Sometimes seeing what you have accomplished is motivation to keep going ! Best of luck !

AliceDark

It might be helpful for you to remember that exercise isn't required to lose weight; losing weight is primarily due to your caloric intake. It can be incredibly beneficial in a lot of ways, so I'm not telling you not to exercise, but you can lose weight without exercising. I'm saying this because I don't want you to feel guilty if there are days when you don't have the energy to exercise. Exercise gives some people energy, but it can be draining for other people (depending on what particular issues you have going on). Take baby steps, make small improvements, and don't beat up on yourself if there are days when you just don't have the spoons to exercise.

Your first order of business needs to be to get the medication for your depression/anxiety/seizures sorted out. You mentioned seeing a therapist, but I didn't see a mention of someone who can look at your full profile and handle your medication. (In the US, at least, therapists typically can't prescribe medications; you would need to see a psychiatrist). Because you have some legitimate concerns about whether or not the side effects could exacerbate your seizure disorder, you need to have someone qualified who can oversee all of your medications.

Since I mentioned intake before, I'm going to give you some completely unsolicited advice...when you set up your profile on MFP, start with a small deficit (0.5 pounds). Don't be aggressive right from the beginning. Since you already have issues with low energy, dropping your caloric intake through the floor could be a really bad idea. Get used to a slightly lowered intake and make sure your system responds well to the deficit first. You can always adjust to lose more quickly later on, but if you put too much stress on yourself at first and burn yourself out, it can be difficult to get back on the horse later.

doodleswithpencils

Sorry that you are going through this. I've been there, bar seizures, and it's horrible. In my personal experience as far as I can tell dietary changes have made all the difference, oh and some awareness of mindfulness. I find gluten (or all grains, not sure about that) and dairy and sugar pull me down badly. It is hard to quit all of them, but because I feel so much better (like I feel normal and happy and have energy), I do try. And I can tolerate small amounts of all anyway, once my system is clear. Google Julia Ross's Mood Cure if you're interested in more info, and Jon Kabat-Zinn on YouTube for info on mindfulness, which really helped me with anxiety and panic. All the best!

Kyrenora

Have you ever tried yoga therapy? It's definitely not a replacement for regular therapy or medication, but I find that it's an essential part of my self-care, along with medication and therapy. I have anxiety (OCD) and seasonal depression. When I'm having a bad day, the right yoga video can really pick me up and get me back into a comfortable mindset. I would recommend the videos by Nicky Jones on DoYogaWithMe.com - her style is so relaxing and uplifting.

she_lived_wholly_forevermore

I deal with similar issues, minus the seizures,plus a few extras. Starting small is the best thing. I suggest looking for things that feel less like a chore and like you're just having fun/relaxing etc. for me that's dancing and running. Just hang in there. I know a lot of days can suck really bad but just be patient with yourself. You've got this.

pointkoala

I'm not seeing a doctor who can prescribe me any seizure meds yet. In Canada, we need a referral for that - so I'm currently waiting on MRI results from a doctor from a walk-in clinic and then hopefully he refers me to either a psychiatrist or neurologist. Either one should be able to at least help. And if not, then they could refer me to the other.

My goal here is 2 lbs/week which only gives me 1200 cals to eat per day. Of course I go over that regularly but it should still make me lose weight. I don't know. I want to just start big and get it all done with but it seems so overwhelming. Small goals don't make me feel successful but I guess that's better in the long run. I keep going on MFP and then quitting for a while and gaining back the weight

I've heard of quite a few people stopping eating gluten and feeling better. I do love gluten though and I don't eat dairy, meat, etc. (which in itself makes a difference) but who knows, gluten might be a factor. Sugar certainly could be.

Yoga therapy, I have not really heard of that before, but it seems interesting! I should try it out. I personally think a lot of smaller things will fix a larger problem, not one major thing, so smaller things ex. yoga therapy, adding certain nutrients, perhaps removing food, those kinds of things can help solve the actual issue.