Food Pushers

suzan06

My MIL is the worst. She does it to me, H, and the grandkids. She pretty much loves my kids because they will hoover up anything she puts in front of them. I am firm with her if I don't want any. First, "No thank you". Then, I get borderline rude, and that does the trick "I ALREADY SAID NO, WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME AGAIN" in a annoyed/mad/firm/you are being so rude tone of voice. Then she stops. H will not be firm with her and she will just badger and badger and badger until he leaves the room. Niece and her have huge power struggles. Niece wins, because 4 year olds are smart like that, but MIL will waste an hour trying to order and cajole niece into eating when she clearly doesn't want to.

So yes, these people definitely exist. But if you are firm and consistent they will learn quick no to bother.

robingmurphy

I've had to sit my boyfriend down and have a little heart-to-heart about it - "I know you're just trying to make me happy - and it's fine to offer me sweets or other goodies - but if I say no, you need to accept it. It's stressful for me and just rude to keep pushing when I've clearly said 'no' to something." Since I had that talk with him, it has helped, but sometimes he kind of backslides.

I'd go with the theory of taking a bite or two just to please the person offering ... but I see some of these people often, and it would end up being hundreds of extra calories if I did that. And I have a tendency to backslide when I eat too much sweets/treats.

_runnerbean_

_runnerbean_

I live in Ireland - it's full of "Mrs Doyle" types- go on, go on, go on, go on..., just say NO!

BeckyBelnap2

Food = Love. A lot of us were raised with it and have the waistlines to prove it. My mom makes my favorite treat to prove that she thought of me and loves me. I eat it to show that I love her and realize that she thought of me. Crazy, but that is the underlying emotion behind why mom wouldn't take no for an answer.

We finally talked about the unspoken reasons behind the food pushing and things are a lot better. If you are going to turn down their food, you do need to figure out a different way to let them give and receive your love. Mom and I go for half hour walks now. It helps.

Larissa_NY

sullus wrote: »

Do people who won't take "no, thank you" for an answer actually exist? (other than grandmothers)

I really wonder if it's a regional thing. I have never in my entire life had anyone keep trying to get me to eat something after I'd told them I didn't want any - except for my actual grandmother, who never tried it again after I demanded that she explain in detail exactly how my cleaning my plate was helping starving children in Foreign Parts, and whether it wasn't in fact worse on them for American kids to be eating more of the world's food supply than they even wanted.

So I don't know where all these food pushers come from that other people seem to encounter constantly. I think if I ever met one I'd be so stunned at their rudeness that I wouldn't even know how to answer them.