Have you ever been told that you don't need to lose any more weight?

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  • AliceAxe
    AliceAxe Posts: 172 Member
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    perhaps some of it is because we are so used to obesity as being the average for the general populous? also if they agree you could lose weight then they have to admit to the fact that they are overweight themselves and you are doing soemthing about whereas they are not. Sort of the misery loves company thing. People think I am thin, but I have been trying like hell to get back down into a healthy BMI. with dieting right now I am at the top number of what is healthy but I have bad arthritis and I want to get down to my lower bmi,Ive been there and it if feels SO much better to not carry around the excess weight I dont need. as many have said its about feeling your best and being your healthiest. perhaps when critisized, why not suggest the MFP website and to join you in persuing a healthier lifestyle?
  • evildeadedd
    evildeadedd Posts: 108 Member
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    Rarely I think it comes from a place of actual concern. Sometimes we get fixated on a number and a pound more than that is failure. Most of the time it is an issue of skewed perception. At 6 foot 300 pounds people guess I weigh 275 to 250, so when I say my goal is 200 they look at me like I have 3 heads because 100 pounds is a lot of weight. They think if I look 250 at 300 then I will be emaciated at 200 which just isn't true.
    I also think it is people projecting their insecurities onto you. People are very self involved these days. They see you trying to be healthy, looking better, feeling better, and instead of being happy for you, it makes them feel bad about their habits. "Well Jim isn't eating a box of donuts a day anymore. Maybe I should cut down to a half dozen myself....naaaa better idea, if I can get Jim to eat a donut it proves that it's all futile, he will fail and his failure proves that I right and justified in my own bad habits."
  • mespreeman
    mespreeman Posts: 70 Member
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    Rarely I think it comes from a place of actual concern. Sometimes we get fixated on a number and a pound more than that is failure. Most of the time it is an issue of skewed perception. At 6 foot 300 pounds people guess I weigh 275 to 250, so when I say my goal is 200 they look at me like I have 3 heads because 100 pounds is a lot of weight. They think if I look 250 at 300 then I will be emaciated at 200 which just isn't true.
    I also think it is people projecting their insecurities onto you. People are very self involved these days. They see you trying to be healthy, looking better, feeling better, and instead of being happy for you, it makes them feel bad about their habits. "Well Jim isn't eating a box of donuts a day anymore. Maybe I should cut down to a half dozen myself....naaaa better idea, if I can get Jim to eat a donut it proves that it's all futile, he will fail and his failure proves that I right and justified in my own bad habits."

    At 6'2" and (currently) 313, I have almost the exact same experiences.

    People think I'm kidding when I tell them my current weight.
  • scolaris
    scolaris Posts: 2,145 Member
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    Ignore ignore ignore
    There will be gatekeepers who become deeply uncomfortable with what is possible...
    Ignore ignore ignore
  • nuttynanners
    nuttynanners Posts: 249 Member
    edited April 2016
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    There are 2 kinds of people who downplay others' weight loss: 1) Insecure People, or 2) Brainwashed People

    Insecure people take your weight loss efforts personally on some level. Whether it makes them insecure about their weight, accomplishments, career, or whatever... they are either consciously or subconsciously letting your success reflect poorly upon themselves. Jealous, much?

    Brainwashed people have lost sight of the fact that the American population is dealing with a largely overweight and obese population. They just consider our inflated sizes the new "normal". They forget about the risk factors for diabetes and heart disease.

    There's a possibility that they are just trying to be nice, as if to say they had never considered you "overweight". But if they give you unsolicited negativity then they probably just belong in category no. 2.
  • Maxematics
    Maxematics Posts: 2,287 Member
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    Some people ALWAYS have something to say. They don't know when to stop talking or when to mind their business. I have a co-worker like this. Apparently I "no longer look like a woman", yet she wants to know my "secret". Whenever there is a treat around the office, I'm told I don't eat things like that and it's followed by shock when I actually cut myself a piece. The more people gossip, the more mundane their lives are. Only pathetic people have time to speculate about bs like someone else's weight.
  • SunflowerCutie
    SunflowerCutie Posts: 61 Member
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    There are 2 kinds of people who downplay others' weight loss: 1) Insecure People, or 2) Brainwashed People

    Insecure people take your weight loss efforts personally on some level. Whether it makes them insecure about their weight, accomplishments, career, or whatever... they are either consciously or subconsciously letting your success reflect poorly upon themselves. Jealous, much?

    Brainwashed people have lost sight of the fact that the American population is dealing with a largely overweight and obese population. They just consider our inflated sizes the new "normal". They forget about the risk factors for diabetes and heart disease.

    There's a possibility that they are just trying to be nice, as if to say they had never considered you "overweight". But if they give you unsolicited negativity then they probably just belong in category no. 2.

    Yeah. Also heart problems run on my mom's side of the family and I don't want that either so that's why I'm trying to get healthier.
  • SunflowerCutie
    SunflowerCutie Posts: 61 Member
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    scolaris wrote: »
    Ignore ignore ignore
    There will be gatekeepers who become deeply uncomfortable with what is possible...
    Ignore ignore ignore

    Yeah. I'm doing what's best for me
  • SunflowerCutie
    SunflowerCutie Posts: 61 Member
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    Rarely I think it comes from a place of actual concern. Sometimes we get fixated on a number and a pound more than that is failure. Most of the time it is an issue of skewed perception. At 6 foot 300 pounds people guess I weigh 275 to 250, so when I say my goal is 200 they look at me like I have 3 heads because 100 pounds is a lot of weight. They think if I look 250 at 300 then I will be emaciated at 200 which just isn't true.
    I also think it is people projecting their insecurities onto you. People are very self involved these days. They see you trying to be healthy, looking better, feeling better, and instead of being happy for you, it makes them feel bad about their habits. "Well Jim isn't eating a box of donuts a day anymore. Maybe I should cut down to a half dozen myself....naaaa better idea, if I can get Jim to eat a donut it proves that it's all futile, he will fail and his failure proves that I right and justified in my own bad habits."

    Yeah probably. My Mama lost weight to het healthier in the past so that's what I'm doing too.
  • nuttynanners
    nuttynanners Posts: 249 Member
    edited April 2016
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    There are 2 kinds of people who downplay others' weight loss: 1) Insecure People, or 2) Brainwashed People

    Insecure people take your weight loss efforts personally on some level. Whether it makes them insecure about their weight, accomplishments, career, or whatever... they are either consciously or subconsciously letting your success reflect poorly upon themselves. Jealous, much?

    Brainwashed people have lost sight of the fact that the American population is dealing with a largely overweight and obese population. They just consider our inflated sizes the new "normal". They forget about the risk factors for diabetes and heart disease.

    There's a possibility that they are just trying to be nice, as if to say they had never considered you "overweight". But if they give you unsolicited negativity then they probably just belong in category no. 2.

    Yeah. Also heart problems run on my mom's side of the family and I don't want that either so that's why I'm trying to get healthier.

    My mom's side has a history of heart problems, too! I hope to stay active throughout adulthood so I don't fall into that trap! I read a really inspirational article about this 96 year old man who has stayed active over the years and how it's kept him young. He was born in 1919 and he is a sprinter, lmao!

    Check this guy out! http://www.today.com/health/world-s-fittest-96-year-old-charles-eugster-shares-diet-t87956

    Omg, he's on Twitter too! Hahaha! I can't believe it.
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
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    I started getting this when I was about 10lbs heavier than when I eventually decided to stop losing at a BMI of 20 - just on the lighter side of the healthy BMI range. I'm 5' 3", so 10 lbs is plenty noticeable. It didn't really bother me for the most part. Everyone feels they have to say something, and 'you should stop losing' is often meant as a compliment - basically telling you you're perfect as you are.

    However, when I started getting it from a family friend who's a nurse, and she was pitching it as though I was already medically underweight and commenting how being overweight was healthier than being healthy weight, etc, that pissed me off. Particularly since it was at a party and the next thing you know, others are starting to think they should be concerned. I ended up telling her off by correcting her facts as well as letting her know that the study she was referencing was poorly analyzed and had been corrected years ago.

    Funny thing is that I'm in the middle of losing some vanity pounds and am now lighter than I was when I stopped losing 2-3 years ago. As far as I can tell, no one has noticed a thing. And I doubt anyone but me will notice anything if/when I get to the %BF I'm aiming for, either.
  • Whitezombiegirl
    Whitezombiegirl Posts: 1,042 Member
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    It depends on what im wearing! I can be told ive gained weight when i havnt and lost weight when ive gained. If im lookubg tired or no makeup people tell me im looking skinny. Silly People!
  • Numberwang22
    Numberwang22 Posts: 213 Member
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    Honestly I think people forget how small being normal weight is! I had a few 'don't lose any more' at top end of normal BMI, I still have a few wobbly bits and not even halfway to middle range. I'm focused on my stuff and not really paying attention to people's weird perceptions of what's a healthy weight.