How do you stay focused when unfortunate things happen?

zahid222
zahid222 Posts: 233 Member
in Motivation and Support
My brother is diagnosed with myeloma. Since I got the news I feel all my energy has been sucked out of me. I should have worked out but I didn't in spite I had the time. Any suggestions? He is in Canada I feel compelled to help him, what can I do ?I am in the USA) :(

Replies

  • thrld
    thrld Posts: 610 Member
    When my mom had a hemorrhagic stroke, which would not stop bleeding, she went into a coma. Afterwards, she was hospitalized for weeks in the ICU during which doctors couldn't say if she'd ever walk/talk/make it out of the ICU.

    Focus is hard. But what I can tell you is this -- anything you can do to reduce your stress is good. Anything that helps make you physically stronger is good. Anything that allows you to just go and do and be and not worry for once, is good.
    You may feel guilty at the thought of doing something positive for yourself. But don't. Because every healthy thing you do for yourself will make you fitter (emtionally and physically) to help your brother and deal with your regular life. My mom needed lots of physical therapy, and being able to physically support her and help her made a big difference. My mom made a good recovery and astounded her doctors. I wish nothing but the best for you and your brother.
  • dgirldance
    dgirldance Posts: 9 Member
    I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. It is very difficult to stay focused when we're in the midst of a crisis - I know that if I'm having a hard time dealing with something, I'm very compelled to stop taking care of myself (eating right, exercising, etc.), for whatever reason. But I try to ask myself how doing that will help my situation - in your case, how will not working out help your brother? You are at your best and are the most able to be there and help others if you take care of yourself.

    I also try to stay in the moment as much as I can - take things a little bit at a time. You may have heard "one day at a time" before - sometimes things are so tough you can only take one minute at a time.

    Hang in there - just know that others have been in your shoes too and you're not alone!
  • zahid222
    zahid222 Posts: 233 Member
    Thank you so much for the well wishing and advise. I will try to stay focused and pay attention to here and now.

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