Burned out and need advice

rileyes

Actually @Capt_Apollo gave great advice. Get up ten to twenty minutes earlier and whip out a quickie circuit. Get. It. Done. Also what @jemhh suggested can help make it habit. Don't put too much thought into it.

pippishortstockings

Up until about two months ago, I was working one full time job and a part time evening/weekend job. I never had time to exercise, and wanted nothing more than to go home and flop into bed (I also immediately put on something comfy the moment I walk through the door). Also, I totally understand having a spouse who needs to lose weight but spends all of his time in front of a video game.

What you DON'T want is to throw yourself into something that is going to make you even more worn out, because you aren't ready for it. I love all the ideas of finding something to do for ten minutes. I would suggest starting by marching in place during commercials, and while your food is cooking. I often find myself stepping side to side while in front of the oven (instead of just standing), or while doing meal prep. Then, if you are watching TV after dinner, stand up and march in place during commercials. Touch your knees to the palms of your hands, and only during commercials. It annoys your spouse? Assimilate or be quiet!

Also, as far as your sleep, I have struggled with sleepless nights caused by anxiety all my life. What I have found helps me is taking a melatonin (to fall asleep) and a valerian root (to stay asleep) a half hour before bedtime with a full glass of water, and doing some slow stretches. Nothing intense or complicated, just toe touches and shoulder rolling.

Good luck!

ashowers36

oocdc2 wrote: »

Is going straight to the gym/to class after work--not stopping at home--an option? I find that, as soon as I'm home, that it's all over for me, too.

Unfortunately no. I have a pet who needs insulin shots every 12 hours so he needs his shot at 7:00 am and 7:00pm. Also I prefer to work out at home where no one can see me make a fool of myself. lol.

oocdc2 wrote: »

Something else: you don't have to exercise to lose weight. I've lost 60 pounds with diet alone.

I don't want to just lose weight. I used to be a dancer so I have a lot of muscle, especially in the thigh area, that needs to be toned up again as it has become shall we say flabby/weak since I no longer dance and have become extremely less active than I used to be 10 years ago.

ashowers36

Thank you everyone for the helpful advice and tips. I will be sure to try some of these out tonight. To those who suggested that I just get up earlier I understand it works for you but not everyone can handle only 5 hours a sleep a night. I for one cannot. So if someone says that getting up 20-30 minuets extra in the morning is not possible for them please don't keep suggesting it as it will, in my experience anyway, just lead to them not being consistent with the routine and skipping the workout because they are too tired . I work two jobs and I can barely function on the 6 1/2 to 7 hours on average that I get and that is with waking up at least 2 times a night. My sleep is neither quantity or quality. I'd rather have that extra 20-30 minutes of sleep than crash my car on my way home from work because I was too tired to stay awake behind the wheel.

elaineously

I have had similar problems with being tired and feeling depressed and having a hard time with exercise. I find that working on small steps to do better is the best way to not be overwhelmed by it. You could try using a 3 or 5 pound hand weight to do small arm exercises during commercial breaks while relaxing in front of the TV. Or just sitting on an exercise ball while chilling and doing a few core strengthening moves.

Also I agree with the person who mentioned that you can make a lot of weight loss progress with just getting your food intake dialed in. Again, don't try to do everything all at once, start with a small improvement like cutting out soda or eating more veggies. Once you feel like you have mastered the first small change then add another. It will eventually add up to good results! If you still need an accountability partner, feel free to add me. I totally understand the added struggle of depression/anxiety on top of trying to loose weight.

tulips_and_tea

ashowers36 wrote: »

Thank you everyone for the helpful advice and tips. I will be sure to try some of these out tonight. To those who suggested that I just get up earlier I understand it works for you but not everyone can handle only 5 hours a sleep a night. I for one cannot. So if someone says that getting up 20-30 minuets extra in the morning is not possible for them please don't keep suggesting it as it will, in my experience anyway, just lead to them not being consistent with the routine and skipping the workout because they are too tired . I work two jobs and I can barely function on the 6 1/2 to 7 hours on average that I get and that is with waking up at least 2 times a night. My sleep is neither quantity or quality. I'd rather have that extra 20-30 minutes of sleep than crash my car on my way home from work because I was too tired to stay awake behind the wheel.

Sleep is imperative for your mental and physical health. Do you know why your sleep is interrupted? I was sleep deprived for several years and thought I could just deal with it. Not a good idea. Finally made some changes and it took a good year or so to get caught up on quality sleep and get in a good routine. After that I felt like a completely different person! Any way to work on the sleep issues?

Not saying you need less than you do now, but improving the quality of your sleep could work wonders for you in the long run.

Capt_Apollo

ashowers36 wrote: »

Capt_Apollo wrote: »

ashowers36 wrote: »

Capt_Apollo wrote: »

become a morning person

This was not helpful advice. Please see previous comments about mornings.

i'm sorry. instead, try and sleep faster.

Sleep faster? I feel like you are trying to troll me.

i'm completely serious. go to bed earlier. get some proper sleep. don't watch tv at night. you need a bedtime routine. mine is getting everything set up for the next day: workout clothes, work clothes, pre-workout snack, set up my coffee pot, brush my teeth, etc. then i read for like, 20 minutes and i'm out like a light.

i have an alarm set up with a motivating song, and my alarm app requires me to do effing math to shut it off. 90% of the time by the time i get the answer right, i'm awake. i smell the delicious coffee brewing, and i take a moment to go to the bathroom. i pour a cup of coffee and start getting dressed. within twenty minutes of waking up, i'm working out.

too many people would rather sleep than achieve their goals. i work long hours, and have failed many times at getting in an evening workout. but mornings are all me.

ew_david

I would just work on your diet at this point. It doesn't sound like you're willing to make any changes to your schedule to accommodate any kind of exercise.

RoseTheWarrior

_dracarys_ wrote: »

I would just work on your diet at this point. It doesn't sound like you're willing to make any changes to your schedule to accommodate any kind of exercise.

^ have to agree at this point.

rileyes

ashowers36 wrote: »

I work two jobs and by the time I get home it is 6:30 at night and I am just mentally exhausted. All I really want to do is just relax and basically not think or do anything. What I need to do is

get off my butt and workout. I could really use some advice on who to recharge my batteries when I get home. I am so not a morning person so getting up early to work out has never worked for me in the past.

You have to want it. Do not get on your butt until after your workout. Stay. Away. From. The. Couch! Go into it (your exercise) thinking just ten minutes. It may turn into a good workout. And a good workout can get you a good night sleep.

You. Have. To. Want. It.

rileyes

I missed the part about your husband. You need to get him on board. He is your partner and best friend, right? Then he's got to get off his butt and participate if you guys are going to have a long and healthy life ahead of you.

Also you mentioned depression and sleep problems. Have you seen doctors who specifically deal with these issues? I'm thinking you have sleep apnea or your husband snores. Or both. Take care of it now.

You sound very frustrated. But you are on the right path with adding exercise to your day. MFP forums can be very inspiring. Surround yourself with healthy ideas and don't look back. Stay focused.

LKArgh

ashowers36 wrote: »

Working out does help with the depression and anxiety as I noticed that in the past. It also seems to help me sleep better as well. Those are some of the main reasons I want to find a way to deal with my burned out state when I get home from work.

I wish I could find an accountability buddy. My husband also needs to lose some serious weight but I can't seem to get him motivated to do so. He would rather sit at his computer playing games on his days off and he really hasn't been helping with the house work much either. Which makes me feel even more stressed out and overwhelmed coming home to a dirty house day in and day out. All of my friends have kids and live at least 15 minutes away so I can't really use them as accountability buddies either.

To give you guys an idea of my weekly schedule I wake up at 6:50 am to get ready for work. I work my two jobs from 8:00 am to 6:00 pm. By the time I get home it is around 6:30pm. And because I am so tired a lot of the house work doesn't get done until the weekend, since my spouse doesn't seem inclined to help me out there, so I do house chores all weekend. I never really feel rested or relaxed at all and it has been like this for a couple of years now.

Also on a side note any suggestions about eating supper when I get home? I don't know if I should eat supper when I get home or wait until after I workout. I know it isn't good to eat too late or too close to bed time but like I said I don't get home until 6:300 in the evening.

You need to solve the big problems first, because this is not working for you. The problem is not whether you can squeeze some workouts in there, the problem is you need to have time to do things for yourself. If your marriage is preventing you from feeling good, you need to address this first.

2katlover

Where did you find your ticker and how did you add it to your page?

ashowers36

2catslover wrote: »

Where did you find your ticker and how did you add it to your page?

I created a personalized Ticker. You go to your profile and you have a choice of using a standard one or a personalized one. Unfortunately to get your ticker to show up on the forums right now you have to enter the BBCode this generated when you make you ticker. I put a help ticket in on this issue and they are hoping to get it fixed but right now the only way to get your ticker to show up is to copy and paste the BBCode at the end of your post. Once you have your Ticker you can just go to Tickers under the App tab and click the get the code for your ticker link.

davidcliff

Capt_Apollo is right. If the last thing you want to do after work is go work out, than you need to do it before work! I too work 2 jobs, have 2 kids, and have a wife that works evenings, so in a sense I am a single father. The biggest thing about working out in the morning is getting out of bed, once you are on your feet it's easy(so to speak). Then when you get home from work you're done, dinner, clean-up, and bed. Once you get a work out program in place you will find that you sleep much better.

eep223

ashowers36 wrote: »

Thanks for all the helpful suggestions. I think some of you are right about the sitting down part when I get home. First thing I always do is go up to my room and change into something more comfortable. The minute I do I am in trouble because then all I want to do is lay in bed. I know some of you strongly suggest getting up even ten minutes earlier in the morning to exercise but it just really isn't an option for me. I sleep poorly as it is waking up many times throughout the night. I only get 6.5 to 7 hours a sleep on average so I need every single second of sleep that I can get just so I can function through my work day without falling asleep at work or on the drive to and from home.

I should have mentioned that I do deal with depression and anxiety so when those flare up it can be even harder to find the motivation because all I want to do is stay in bed an sleep.

I deal with similar issues and have ultimately found that exercising (running is what works for me) helps SO much with not only the anxiety and depression, but with my sleep problems, that that is motivation enough for me to do it. Once I got to the point where I could run for a half hour or more at a time, I really felt it when I didn't do it. Getting to that point is the tough part, so you just have to make yourself do it until you WANT to do it, but I promise that it does get more fun and easier!

sk1982

no-one is saying that finding time to workout is easy, and I get you arent a morning person so initially it will be very hard. But what you also might find is that when you start wrking out you should sleep better in general so maybe getting up in the morning may not be as difficult.

Sounds like you have a lot to talk to your husband about in terms of his ability to lighten your load so you have some time to focus on "you" every day....

Someone said to me once by saying "i dont have time" for this gym, what you are really saying is "the gym is not a priority". And thats fine if thats the case, but own that and try not to make excuses. There will be days that its not a priority, because smething else more urgent/important is and thats fine....but no lies to yourself!!

CindyS858

ashowers36 wrote: »

Thank you everyone for the helpful advice and tips. I will be sure to try some of these out tonight. To those who suggested that I just get up earlier I understand it works for you but not everyone can handle only 5 hours a sleep a night. I for one cannot. So if someone says that getting up 20-30 minuets extra in the morning is not possible for them please don't keep suggesting it as it will, in my experience anyway, just lead to them not being consistent with the routine and skipping the workout because they are too tired . I work two jobs and I can barely function on the 6 1/2 to 7 hours on average that I get and that is with waking up at least 2 times a night. My sleep is neither quantity or quality. I'd rather have that extra 20-30 minutes of sleep than crash my car on my way home from work because I was too tired to stay awake behind the wheel.

Have you ever tried something natural to help you get more restful/productive sleep? Like Melatonin or Magnesium?

kimny72

OP, maybe start out small. When you get home from work, change into your workout clothes, do what you need to do for your pets, then take a quick 10 minute walk. Once that becomes a habit, maybe you can increase that to more of a workout. You can also try saving a couple of hundred calories for a snack to eat right before you leave work, it might give you a little extra energy.

As far as the weekends, if it takes you all weekend to do the chores, it comes down to priorities. Are there chores you can let slide? Listen, I'm kind of a slob, so what I can put up with may be far different than what you can put up with, but if physical fitness is a priority to you then something else has to take a back-seat.

The fact of the matter is that finding time to workout isn't easy for anyone. There are things I simply don't get around to doing, but I always find a way to get my workout in. Anyone who works out regularly has sacrificed something else in their life that could have used that time. Ultimately you are the only one who can figure that out. Good luck!

CaptianAmer

Pre workout really helps me I'm the same way with work. Once you stop and kick back at home it's really hard to get back up. Just take some pre workout and get to the gym it will give that boost to get your workout in. Then get a protein drink in you right after workout. You can also drink on some bcaas while you workout to stealer recovery.

OyGeeBiv

kimny72 wrote: »

The fact of the matter is that finding time to workout isn't easy for anyone. There are things I simply don't get around to doing, but I always find a way to get my workout in. Anyone who works out regularly has sacrificed something else in their life that could have used that time. Ultimately you are the only one who can figure that out. Good luck!

This^^^^^ <applauding>