i just cried resisting the urge to eat junk food (binge)

sati18

i understand, ive cried over food many times, stole other peoples food to binge on etc. well done for being so strong, it's a big step. and ((hugs)) for how painful this was, i wouldn't wish those feelings on my worst enemy

LearnFromTheRed

I think you've done incredibly well. You actually got the outcome you really wanted, and although it might have been really tough to get there, you did it.

zenalasca

Keep up the good work!!

Yess... I know exactly how you feel. That sudden urge to eat something and keep eating it til it's gone. I've had thousands of calories in this way. Cake is the worst! But it was thoughts about your daughter and how you would see yourself that made you stop.

ShmareParks

I cannot BELIEVE you resisted. I have been there so many times, and I have never won. Not when I want it that bad.

Like one of the previous posters, I have totally thrown whole bags of chips in the garbage and then put gross stuff on top of them because otherwise I knew I was about to eat the whole bag with no control whatsoever.

Yummy food is like a drug, isn't it?

And yet, I would NEVER have a long battle in the kitchen staring down a vegetable - hahahha!

Anyway, I'm very impressed that you a) didn't eat the cake and b) shared this with all of us. Thank you. Good luck. Be strong and be the you you want to be.

Dunkirk

Your daughter's Daddy is a hero. Thanks for sharing :-)

darrensurrey

Relevantish video: http://youtu.be/dBnniua6-oM

Camera_BagintheUK

Good for you for thinking about your actions and writing them down. You are definitely not weak, this is strength. You should be proud of yourself.

+1

What would have happened before you started your weight loss? You'd just have done it unthinking. So something's changed in your head! You should be proud! You're in control of your eating not the other way around.

Giovanna_Isabella_Santarelli

Well done! You had a lot of courage to resist eating the cake and stuffing your face with all sorts of junk...

Almost all of us here have/had days like this... just be strong and remember when you start seeing all the pounds slowly disappearing the confidence will slowly start creeping in and you will be able to live your life and do all the things you missed out on doing in the past...

Stay... POSITIVE & WORK HARD AT THIS.... like you've never worked hard at anything before... Good luck!!! And, remember, there are tons of people on this site who will support you and cheer you on... :flowerforyou:

GG70

Pain Vs. Pleasure:

Congrats on your win over that battle in that moment!
The thing is if you DID eat it and then eat more, it is never enough.. the void is never actually filled. We then look for more but, still not satisfied.. BUT when we make the healthier choice YOU made to exercise and eat a healthier choice, this is one step in filling that void because we are making ourselves stronger and that truly is what we want, NOT the food. Our bodies CRAVE nutrition: physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Recently, my kickboxing instructor, who is an exceptional human being and holds high degrees of black belts in many different areas martial arts, said that pain vs. pleasure needs to be looks upon in a new light. He said that if I wanted to eat something unhealthy and remain with old habits, it will give me pleasure in that exact moment, but will cause me pain in some capacity not that long after. BUT if you recognize that the pleasure you are seeking can be extended over a long time by choosing another means of achieving it, you may have to endure the pain of resisting the urge to eat for immediate gratification which is what you did!! It is a balance.. and it sounds like you are on the path to long term pleasure !

renablue25

This sounds so much like me. Thanks for sharing!

amandamurdaugh

I know the feeling well. You described it all perfectly. And it's amazing that people will say, "just have a little to satisfy the craving." They don't understand that a little escalades into a major binge. You're certainly not alone. I hope today is less intense for you. Thank you for sharing those raw emotions.

getrealforme

WOW....your amazing. I have never been able to stop a binge, once I decided I was going to eat it. Food is a terrible addiction, and when your an addict you can not have just a little bit. You made a huge step. That is what this is all about, one day at a time, one step at a time, one fight at a time. You should feel so proud of yourself, every body has to start somewhere. It will get better, but every day say...........just for today I will be in control, just for today. Then tomorrow is today again. You will beat this, everyday is a new day, a new fight. Face each day with..........BRING IT ON!!

NonnyMary

I am glad the OP wrote that because I know Im not the only one who has done that. I have had times in my "just dont care what i eat" stage when i was going thru stress, i went to the store, got my favorite pack of 3 cream eclairs, and some other chocolate, and i sat down and it was the best thing ever. i even felt my self relax. it truly is a drug,, like crack to a crack addict. you can actually feel your stress relax when you start eating that stuff. its weird when you think how can something be so powerful .. i mean really, its our own arms that are putting the stuff in our mouth. but it tastes good, and it looks so yummy, who can resist? thats why they made desserts and things so irresistable.

i do kind of miss some of my fave foods, and when i see a tv commercial on tv for Red Lobster I always ended up at Red Lobster. the love of food increases when i see too many commercials for fast food that i used to crave. now i see those commercials, and i do miss them in a way, but not enough to go buy it, but i do still feel a bit of "i kinda miss that" kind of feeling when i see delish food and i am not going to put that in my mouth for a long long time.

Foods taste good, and its too painful to give them up sometimes, especially around holidays when we HAVE to have traditional turkey dinner with all the fattening items. thats when sentimentality about food comes in..

when we had free food catered into work the other day, i chose a chicken wrap over the other fattening food,, when we have other free food catered in that is even wose, that is when i will find it a bit hard to not choose it, because its FREE, and so yummy,,, but i will try one day at a time.

Grammie4VT

You are awesome! Most of us have been in your shoes without the same results. It takes real courage and willpower to resist! You should be really proud of yourself! WTG!!!!

GrandMaKandy

To enjoy good health, to bring true happiness to one's family, to bring peace to all, one must first discipline and control one's own mind. If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him. ~ Buddha

You have fought your first big battle and won, there will be many more along the way, and you will find the strength to overcome them.

buttercup68110

I read this post and it almost brought me to tears. I have the same issue with food. Even if I am not hungry and something is sitting on the counter I will try to eat it. Living with my boyfriend who is naturally skinny and can eat anything does not help. When I put bad food in my mouth my mind is screaming at me to spit it out. Usually I do but sometimes I cant help it. I am working on myself and trying hard to become a better person. Just keep working at it and you will make it to your goal. Its a hard journey but the outcome will be worth it.

Cedarwren

That is an awesome success! I know how that situation feels, been there many times. The urge is so powerful. But you fought it and won.

thanhdle

Food can be a wonderful thing for some people, and at the same time it can ruin our lives. I spend most of my life living by the motto, "I live to eat, not eat to live". So I became a fatass lol. I learned that the best way to counter this is your work out harder and eat the foods you still enjoy but in moderation. That way you dont go crazy depriving yourself of good food such as cake.

SteelySunshine

The best thing is to not have trigger foods in the house. It makes it so much easier to deal with life on an emotional basis. Secondly try to find healthier versions of the foods you love. I am sure you can find healthier cake recipes and eating them without frosting with fruit instead will save lots of calories in your calorie budget. As for fast foods you can do swaps. Swap a big burger for a child size, sweet potato fries are available at one chain Burger King I think. Or swap a veggie burger, which is what I do. That reminds me veggie burger and sweet potato fries yum. Or have fruit instead of fries. There are lots of things you can do to make it easier on yourself. I think it's great to over come a problem, but even better to avoid it in the first place.

Sandytoes71

You mirrored thoughts ive had many times my friend. I don't know you but I'm proud of you!

amanda3jam

OMG where have you been these past few months. I totaly understand your struggle. I have those same feelings towards food. Unfortunantly I havent always been as strong as you and I did some pretty unhealthy things! I think that momment that you experienced, although emotional draining, was a milestone. You overcame a sticky situation before the fact. You have come to the realizitation that there is an alternative and you CAN choose a different route! Good for you! Stay Strong! You can do this! Add me

jen_zz

You were self aware, that's a great thing. It was difficult but you pushed through, should be congratulating yourself on your progress!:flowerforyou:

dianamatienzo

I have so much respect for you You're not weak for feeling that way; you're so strong for stopping yourself! I actually was going to go into the kitchen to get some junk and eat more than I need. Thanks to you, I've convinced myself it's not worth it. I used to binge until I was sick, and I still do so sometimes (not NEARLY as often or badly as before), but lately I've stopped myself sooner or just been overeating slightly. I know EXACTLY how you feel. You're not crazy I feel the same way when I have the stupidest arguments in my own head about eating something, and I also get into the mindset of "I already decided I'm eating it, so it's done; I'm eating it." It's so relieving hearing other's struggles in this same journey. You're helped me more than you can imagine with just this post :') Thank you! Great job! It's a HUGE step in the right direction :]

Kristafulbright

I once heard a dietician advise that if you are eating at least 3 servings of fruit a day, the craving for processed sugar will go away. Perhaps this is just all in my head, but it works for me!

monjacq1964

I woke up and my daughter's birthday cake was on the table while the family was away and i wanted to eat it so bad. I didn't even think about it, i decided I AM GOING to eat this. And it was crazy. At lightning speed when i decided i was going to stuff my mouth full of as much birthday cake as i could (probably not even leaving any for my own kid!) i ALSO decided since i was eating this, i was also going to go out and get burger king and sit down and watch a movie and i got so happy thinking about it. In my head i gotta feeling "this is a fun thing to do!". Then literally right when i was getting a spatula to scoop out a couple pieces of cake for myself my mood just did a 180 and i realized, like a scene out of a movie, i'm screwing up. I saw myself in this eerie 3rd person view: an overweight 29 year old guy choosing to eat junk food knowing he has a problem with his weight. And just that image of a fat guy eating his kid's birthday cake was the most disgusting image i could have ever hoped to be.

What the hell am i doing? What's wrong with me? I'm trying to change my life and lose this weight that's been holding me down for so many years in so many areas of my life. I'm ashamed of the way i look, i hate being seen, i'm not confident, i think about my weight EVERY day and wish i could be skinny and healthy and here i am putting fuel to the fire making my situation even worse. This isn't the man i aspired to be. I wanted to be so much more than just a fat guy succumbing to his weakness of food in a kitchen. I thought about all of this and it just hit me so hard i got emotional. Despite how emotional i was, i couldn't stop thinking "the decision is made. I decided to eat all this crap right now and i'm going to do it!". I was at this pathetic tug of war with the decision to do this or stop and it was...crazy. Like a drug addict detoxing fighting his urge to use again, i was in the kitchen crying because i wanted this food so bad and i knew even though it would do damage to me and my life, i wanted it anyway. SO bad.

I just stood there. For 20 minutes in the kitchen staring at the cake like a crazy person getting emotional over eating it. Ugh. I feel mental for even going through this. How weak am i mentally? I felt so pathetic even having this dialogue with myself. Getting emotional and telling myself "NO! You are overweight and it's screwing up your life! If you binge, it won't be just this once. It's a chain reaction of screwups and if you don't take a stand right freaking now, you may never be happy again!". So...i ate a lower portion controlled meal and now i'm about to drive to the park for a walk. I want to eat junk so bad. Not just a little, ALOT. But i can't continue screwing up my life like this. I'm done. Everything i want in my life would've disappeared with that binge and i want so much more for myself. I've wasted my 20's and i sure as hell am not going to waste my 30s. I've got alot of time to make up for

you are not pathetic for having had that dialogue with yourself. You are awesome!!!! that is incredibly that you did that, and dient end up eating the cake. Hugs, my friend.

JAGWIRE13579

Food can be a terrible addiction, it hits all the pleasure spots in the brain just like an opiate. I think the worst part of being addicted to food is it's almost impossible to avoid all of your triggers. Imagine asking an alcoholic to only drink 3 small drinks per day or having a crack addict handle crack rocks everyday but not to smoke it when everyone else around them is smoking. You did a great job thinking it through and figuring out what was going on in your head not your stomach. There are support groups for food addicts and there are places to go online to figure out if you have a true food addiction. It really is true, you have to take it one day at a time. Don't think about not eating unhealthy food for the rest of your life, just think about getting through today.

xxxclf

This is a very old thread but just wanted to say thank you as last night I burst into tears in the supermarket as I felt like all I wanted was yummy bad food and the end result was I stormed out of the shop without any dinner. Forced myself to have something healthy which I didn't enjoy at the time but was glad i hadn't resisted later on and go for a walk . It's so hard finding someone who understands, the people i live with just do not understand the hold junk food has over me!

ekim2016

good job man... you are the boss, not the junk food... you just kicked butt...

150poundsofme

I understand the need to eat that cake and go get fast food and continue on with the binge for weeks, even months. It sounds like me except YOU BEAT A BINGE!!!!!!!! i beat a binge once time, it was the most amazing thing - I wrote that I wanted to eat on-line and then I took the dog for a walk. i beat a binge. I was thrilled. But unfortunately that was a few years ago, just one time. You did some thorough talking you yourself. So proud of you! I need to learn from you.

Alatariel75

150poundsofme wrote: »

I understand the need to eat that cake and go get fast food and continue on with the binge for weeks, even months. It sounds like me except YOU BEAT A BINGE!!!!!!!! i beat a binge once time, it was the most amazing thing - I wrote that I wanted to eat on-line and then I took the dog for a walk. i beat a binge. I was thrilled. But unfortunately that was a few years ago, just one time. You did some thorough talking you yourself. So proud of you! I need to learn from you.

That's ok, so was this one