Can't seem to get it together.

IrishChik

I have done it before. Three times in my life. Once when I was almost 15 (I am a month shy of my 35th birthday) and 227 pounds (a number I will never forget) my mother took me to the NutriSystem center once a week where I lost over 80 pounds. I kept that weight off through the rest of my high school years and most of college. My weight went from 140 to 180. My doctor put me on the infamous phen/fen where I got back down. I would teeter between 160 to 170 It was a comfortable weight for me. I also had a growth spurt and got much taller, so 140 just was not working for me. After college and entering into adulthood, as well as obtaining a desk job, my weight went right back up, and a good 3-4 inches taller than in highschool, I was right back up past 200. Thankfully my employer brought in the Weight Watchers at Work program, and I continued to go to meetings even after it ended, and when I left that job. I made lifetime, and dropped to 160. As life tends to get in the way, over the course of the last 5 years I had a back injury, lost both my grandparents, three of my best friends, a divorce, and a 1000 mile move, battling depression, ptsd, eating disorder, anxiety and panic attack, my weight went right back up to 240. It has taken my about 6 months to get to 229 and I keep going back and forth.

I am motivated. I try to get some exercise in, but I just can not run 6-7 miles like I used to. My back hurts all the time and honestly, exercise makes it worse. But I keep trying. I had a complete wellness check a few months ago and everything came back perfect except for my liver, and that was due to taking too much aspirin for pain.

I have thought about doing another program again. WW, NS, and even looked at Medifast and its competitors.

I am on food assistance so buying diet food from a company seems like a waste to me, but it seems like this time it is so much harder. Some of it is because this time I am not cooking just for myself, but for my family. I need structure. I joined TOPS right before the holidays last year with my soon to be step mother in law. I was not a fan of the exchange program and meetings seemed to consist more of passing presents around and collecting money for other various games and less time talking about weight loss help. Thankfully I only paid $25, basically for a magazine subscription and I can go back to meetings any time. My life and my schedule are just too crazy for meetings. That is why I much prefer the online options. Weight Watchers seems like a good option for me to go back to, I still have all my materials. I could do it at home, but I really want to just count calories. It is FREE and would be better for a life long change.

I have found that Schwans (I love their stuff but have not eaten it in 7 years or so) and saw they now accept food benefits and have healthy choices. Most of it is precooked and portioned. That is something I need. And I get bored of frozen weight loss meals.

I REALLY want to play roller derby. My chiropractor has voted against it until I drop some weight and get my back stronger. My back is even more miserable since the weight gain. Same thing with having a child. My age is already a factor, my weight and back another. I need to lose the weight for so many reasons.

It seems like I do very well during the day. I am occupied with work and school (I do both from home) so I do not roam to the fridge. It is at night, usually when my fiance has gone to his jujitsu training where I become frantic looking for food to shovel in my mouth.

I am tired of the circle here. I keep trying, and I keep failing and I am just not sure what to do.

Thank you for letting me vent.

Lisamarie1226

Hey girl.

Been there, done that! I have been overweight my entire life and had tried doing many things before. I am almost 35 as well. I'm still on my journey as well.

Now is a great time to get it going and get it going for GOOD! You can do this and with this site and the supportive community, you can succeed. There are so many tools here and so many people to offer motivation and ideas.

Hang in there and good luck. Feel free to add me as friend if you would like.

Peridotite

Hey Girl,

I hear you. I have the same problem with the evenings. If I have nothing to do or I`m bored I eat and eat and eat. I just love food and even knowing what I am eating is bad for me I can stop myself. And I love to buy the bad stuff and have it in the house. But what I found works best for me is I got a hobby (well I got about a billion of them) but ones that I really liked and ones that keep me occupied enough so that I would rather work on them than go to the kitchen for food. Right now it is cross-stitching. I sit in the chair with the TV on and just go to town. Even when I am hungry I am too into what I am doing to bother getting up for something to eat. It might not be for every one but it is what works for me :happy: . I hope you can find what works for you!

Robin1109

I can relate to your back issues. I herniated a disk in my back a few years ago. It kept me sedentary and out of strenuous exercise for a while resulting in a 30lb weight gain. When I saw the scale tip over 200 for the first time in my life, I knew I needed to make a change. I'm fortunate that my back problem was helped by seeing a chiropractor regularly and going through a lot of physical therapy. I still took it slow at first - just walking on the treadmill or doing elliptical - when I began to add exercise back in my life. Now, I'm running, walking, taking spin class, doing Zumba, weight lifting, etc. Maybe you can see if there are any aquatic fitness classes near you? I know the resistance in aquatic fitness classes is said to be great for anyone with injuries. That might help strengthen your back and bring down your weight enough to begin working it a little harder. Good luck and stick with it!

miqisha

The Weight watchers and all those have worked for you up to a point.....however, once you stop using them due to some major change in your life you put the weight back on....

What you need to do, is learn to eat properly on your own....count your calories, log everything you eat....dont try and look for a quick fix, make it a lifestyle change for you.

Sorry your back hurts so much that you cant jog.....but jogging isnt the only form of excercise.....you can walk instead, since the running is hurting you so much.....there are cardio routines and dvds that you can do......

Also, swimming probably would be best for you.....and it works every muscles, and probably wouldnt affect your body as painfully as the running

You can do this, because you have done it before....

Goodluck