having a difficult time, mad at myself

brenn24179

I was 208 lbs 3 yrs ago, got down to 155, well I gained 10 lbs back since summer and 4 more lbs over these snow days. I have been in a eating frenzy, bad habits came back. I realize I cant get enough.

I thought if I had some of these items, choc cake, honey buns, pizza it would be ok. But I just want more and more, it is like I am so greedy. I know I have got to get some self control and say No.

I read my blog and it made me cry. But it helped. I found out something better than food. Self Respect. When I lost weight I changed jobs, quit letting adult kids use me, stopped my hubby when he got irritable and grouchy. I liked myself and made good changes in my life!

when I am overweight, I don't feel good about myself. I hope I can get back with some discipline in my life, I know I can. I am just mad at myself. I quit taking care of myself. I have messed up but I want to turn this around!

rosebarnalice

Good on you! You can do it!!

cnbbnc

That's some wonderful achievement you have under your belt! And good on you for realizing that you're slipping. Even better that you're here and talking about it! That's really wonderful. I have no doubt that you can get right back to where you want to be.

HippySkoppy

This "walking off the trail" happens to the best of us. Constantly keeping eye and mind on the bigger picture is often tiring and we can burn out, we are only human after all and not perfect.

You have made some really good insights by the sounds of it....I like to think that each day can be a valuable learning experience, you are constantly moving forward learning life lessons that down the track help complete a bigger picture and better understanding of your needs, wants and the strategies to implement these for your best best success.

You will get back to where you want to be, you sound motivated and ready to do what needs to be done.

All the best.

brenn24179

thanks so much, love the support, I know I can do this with your help. Hard to admit when you are slipping, but I sure have been.

ncfitbit

brenn24179 wrote: »

I was 208 lbs 3 yrs ago, got down to 155, well I gained 10 lbs back since summer and 4 more lbs over these snow days. I have been in a eating frenzy, bad habits came back. I realize I cant get enough.

I thought if I had some of these items, choc cake, honey buns, pizza it would be ok. But I just want more and more, it is like I am so greedy. I know I have got to get some self control and say No.

I read my blog and it made me cry. But it helped. I found out something better than food. Self Respect. When I lost weight I changed jobs, quit letting adult kids use me, stopped my hubby when he got irritable and grouchy. I liked myself and made good changes in my life!

when I am overweight, I don't feel good about myself. I hope I can get back with some discipline in my life, I know I can. I am just mad at myself. I quit taking care of myself. I have messed up but I want to turn this around!

I'm right there with you. Having a few tough snow days myself and what do I want? Pizza!!! Hamburgers!! All the food, really. Only difference is I'm not at goal yet. Good for you doing what it took to get there. You know how and you KNOW you can do it. You just have to turn this around sooner rather than later, right? Good that you caught it before you gained any more weight, right? Some people seem to come back here having gained back ALL the weight they lost or at least more than 15 lbs. You don't have to be one of those people.

Here's an article I've found helpful. Maybe you will, too. (Basically it's helpful to understand it's not just me or that I'm weak for wanting to eat more of these "hyperpalatable" foods once I start. Also, it helps to know it's best not to start if it will be tough to stop.)

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/23/health/23well.html)

Best of luck to you! I'm rooting for you.

try2again

Not sure what I want to say here except that I can identify and sympathize with you. I've noticed too that when I take care of myself, I'm less tolerant of disrespect & nonsense from others, and I find it interesting that's what you seem to be missing the most. I think it's a good sign, because it shows you are in tune with how you feel and is great non-scale motivation.

fiddletime

I'd pick one thing to stop today- like chocolate cake. None for a week. Then the pizza, chips, or the next big culprit. Then start counting calories again. I've started over and it was harder for me the second time and I went more slowly. Once I got back to exercising and cut out a couple of trigger foods it got easier and my eating frenzy got less. Then I started counting calories since I knew I was close to being able to get below. Or, you can go straight for it. Fast not slowly. Good luck.

brenn24179

I knew I ate when tired, stressed but now know I eat with temptation especially tv with all delicious foods or looking at stuff at grocery store. I am greedy and I have got to say No, you know what that does to you! Knock it off, get to the gym

brenn24179

I am learning from my mistakes over these snow days, next time I wont load the house up with junk food like cinnamon buns, pizza, texas toast bread, choc cake, I will fix healthy soup and healthy foods and may allow myself to have 1 junk food like pizza but not a bunch of it like this year. I just go too crazy. Live and learn

holdenmonty

You recognized it before it got to out of control. Be proud of yourself for that.

dmwh142

It sounds like you are being carb controlled. When this happens to me I will do 2-3 days of Atkins to get the sugar out of my system without having to be hungry then get back to the balanced fat/protein/carb and calories that worked for me most recently. In case of more snow days have some projects ready to do that can keep you busy when you are stuck in the house. This will give you something great to focus on. You have this!

Francl27

You can do it...

My advice is to focus on making tasty meals. If I have tasty, satisfying meals, I don't feel the need to eat as much junk food.

Honestly though, I very rarely have sweet buns or cake anymore, just because it doesn't fill me up at all for the calories. I have pizza when I really crave it, but just two slices of plain cheese pizza. Find lower calorie/more filling options that satisfy you... For example I love Chobani flips, it tastes like dessert for 180-240 calories, but gives you protein and good fats too (the new Oikos crunch have even less calories). And I've found that an apple can be very satisfying as well (but only honeycrisps or pink ladies for me).

47Jacqueline

Last night I cooked a really basic dinner for the first time in about 2 months. It made a difference in how I went through the rest of the evening. I'm not struggling with maintenance, but I moved and it's taking some time to reestablish a meal prep routine, with my last dinner of cookies making me unhappy with my choices.

There's nothing intrinsically wrong with eating cookies for dinner. After a while, it's simply not very satisfying.

brenn24179

I have a husband and I cook regular meals. I thought if I ate some of these junk foods on top of healthy food I would get my fill and go back to heathy eating but it backfired and I couldn't get enough junk once I started. I just kept wanting to buy junk on top of my healthy meals, I wanted to snack all the time on junk food. Now I know I had best leave junk alone, cant stop eating it. I think everyone is different but for me I just want more and more once I start or have to practice self control more saying No if I eat some after getting this weight down some.

ahoy_m8

I identify, OP. I will go a couple days eating more (especially more sweets), and I just want more on top of healthy meals. For me, it's just like you said: I have to practice self control and say "No."

I don't wig out about high days if my weight is in my maintenance range, but I do try to balance it out with lower days over a week or 2. If I'm over my range, I exercise more self control, more planning effort, and go into a slight deficit for a few weeks. Best of luck!

vivmom2014

ahoy_m8 wrote: »

I identify, OP. I will go a couple days eating more (especially more sweets), and I just want more on top of healthy meals. For me, it's just like you said: I have to practice self control and say "No."

I don't wig out about high days if my weight is in my maintenance range, but I do try to balance it out with lower days over a week or 2. If I'm over my range, I exercise more self control, more planning effort, and go into a slight deficit for a few weeks. Best of luck!

This jumped out at me. I relate. The idea of "eat a tasty, satisfying meal and then you won't eat much junk food" doesn't work for me. I can eat the wholesome meal and then want loads of sweets on top of it.

So it's a habit/ritual thing for me. Netflix and snacks downstairs by the fire! I find that I have to interrupt the habit. That's what's hard and that's what takes so much time.

Awareness is always a good starting point.

LivingtheLeanDream

Time to get back to being in charge again then as thats when you are happier and more confident in yourself

You did this before and you've not put on too much yet, but the sooner you take action the sooner you'll feel better about yourself.

So now you have to take charge of your eating, there's no easy way either but if you stick at it for a few days it soon becomes more a natural habit or you get into the way of not eating lots of high cal things and staying within your allotted calories.

You can do this!!

I would recommend weighing yourself at least once a week, that way you can't tell yourself that you're not gaining and you'll also be motivated (hopefully) to take action. Ther'es no better motivation than seeing the pounds melting away. You'll get a nice whoosh that first week of being in deficit and that'll really spur you on

ncfitbit

fiddletime wrote: »

I'd pick one thing to stop today- like chocolate cake. None for a week. Then the pizza, chips, or the next big culprit. Then start counting calories again. I've started over and it was harder for me the second time and I went more slowly. Once I got back to exercising and cut out a couple of trigger foods it got easier and my eating frenzy got less. Then I started counting calories since I knew I was close to being able to get below. Or, you can go straight for it. Fast not slowly. Good luck.

@fiddletime ,this is really helpful advice! At least it's helped me the last few days.

Verdenal

brenn24179 wrote: »

I thought if I had some of these items, choc cake, honey buns, pizza it would be ok. But I just want more and more, it is like I am so greedy. I know I have got to get some self control and say No.

I'm the same way. You have to be honest with yourself. If you lack self-control you have to avoid those foods most of the time.

brenn24179 wrote: »

...I want to turn this around!

Great. What small step can you take today?

ggeise14

Great advice here! And OP, you've noticed and acknowledged the issues, especially by putting it out there. Good advice for some of us (yo-yoers)!