One addiction to another

QueenZeeIsm

I have been a member of myfitnesspal for a long time. This is my second profile in an attempt to try again.

For years I've done the lose weight, gain weight, lose again.... I am so tired of it all. A year ago I lost 30 pounds and was at my goal weight. After some traumatic experience I started drinking alcohol. On a good night, I'd down atleast a bottle of wine by myself.

I'd try and eat right but it won't work because I'm always hungover then I just want to eat carbs fried in butter, oil and sugar!!!!

So basically I have gained the pounds again + an unhealthy liver.

Today is only day 2 sober but I need to focus.

I am eating like a pig though. Its still morning where I am and I've had a bowl of Thai green curry & brown Rice... two hours after that I had a cheese burger, fries and a soda!!!!

Obviously there won't be lunch for me because I am so bloated.... what to do on days like these? I doubt my unfit behind could burn 500 calories so that's out.

Any help will do!

Protranser

Start adding more activity into your life. Small things first: use the stairs when they're an option. If it requires some walking to get to the stairs, then do it.

Park further away from things if you drive often. If you live in an area where you can walk to stores, then start walking to those stores to buy things you need when you need them.

If being sober is something you think you need to prioritize, then prioritize it.

One step at a time. Don't try to change too many things all at once, because it may become a bit too much to juggle. Try if you'd like, but if you find yourself having a hard time with things, then determine which is most important to you at your current position in life and prioritize it.

QueenZeeIsm

Thank you Protranser.

I think this is exactly what happens everytime. I try and do it all at once and then comes the crash.

I've been drinking a bottle of wine or half a litre of vodka a night. I think I need to give my body a chance to recover. I am sure adding exercise and eating healthy won't hurt the detoxing but I fear it might be too much too soon.

I do value and absorb your advise.

Protranser

Stay strong. If you can make peace with your own form of addictive behaviors, you will come out a stronger person.

For me, this means understanding my limits and knowing not to exceed them too frequently, as odd as that sounds.

LKArgh

How long have you been drinking? Maybe a therapist would be a good idea?

lainy1979

Hi, I've been free from my drug of choice since March 2014. I've since had a baby (born 11 weeks premature) & possibly lived the most stressful & emotionally exhausting 18 months of my life! I've obsessed about my old lifestyle every single day it's always been in the back of my mind until i started mfp again a couple of weeks ago (used it thru pregnancy to keep the weight off), I've now got something else to concentrate my thoughts on & give me focus. I substituted drugs for food and weigh the heaviest I ever have, it's going to be tough losing weight the legitimate way but I'm up for the challenge. It's early days for you so don't beat yourself up if you have a bad day, things will eventually fall into place & you'll find a balance for living healthier and sober but just take it 1 day at a time. Why rush? I sincerely wish you all the best

danika2point0

Hi, this is undoubtedly a very hard time for you. When we give up something we had been using or doing daily (whatever that may be), we are often left with A LOT of free time on our hands...It can be very hard to fill that free time in a way that is not counter-productive, e.g. you stop drinking, so you start eating; you stop smoking, so you start drinking more...you get my drift. Anyways, things I have found that help: guzzling herbal teas. I mean a lot of them. Pounding soda water or sparkling water. I can easily drink 2L in a couple of hours. Reading. It seems to be an activity I can really get absorbed in. Busying myself. Doing laundry. Painting my nails. Organising my closet. Reading endless MFP forums. Do you have any activities like that? I wish you the best of luck. I am not saying you have to be perfect, e.g. perfect diet, perfect habits, etc., but if your goal is to feel better about yourself and your physical and mental health (and it sounds like it is), it does not seem that replacing one negative habit (drinking a lot) with another (eating a lot) will help you find what you need. I hope this helps in some way. x

callsitlikeiseeit

1- if you have an addiction, you need to seek professional help in overcoming it.
2- make small changes, dont try to make major life changes all at once (especially if in treatment for an addiction)

as useless as i think my fitbit is for me, for someone looking to start small it may be a good idea, to to start monitoring your activity and making smaller steps in good habits - parking further away, taking stairs, etc....

change a full calorie soda for diet
choose a salad with light or no dressing instead of a burger

make LITTLE changes that boost you up. Little changes add up to larger changes

as much as i talk and joke about drinking, in all reality, I usually only drink on the weekends -and *usually* only heavily if i am out with friends (which might be once or twice a month). Obviously, for someone with problems with drinking this may not be an option.

albatrosssherpa

UGG- I totally feel your pain and am going through the same thing. I had lost quite a bit of weight a few years ago after getting out of a bad relationship. After I lost the weight, I (stupidly) got right back into a relationship with the same person, got laid off (add in other unfortunate life events here), and began drinking A LOT. Now I have gained everything I lost back and then some. I literally weigh more than ever outside of being 9 months pregnant.
I think for me, it is more the mindless eating that comes with it, not so much the booze (I almost exclusively drink whiskey). Yes that pint of whiskey has like 700 calories but the delivery pizza consumed has like a million.
Admittedly there may have been some misery eating and other issues. And you are precisely right- it's hard to eat salad or exercise when you feel like crap from the night before.

I went from 7 days a week to 2 days recently and allow myself just a couple of drinks on those days. I too am concerned about my liver, but this is a good solid start.

I feel better not drinking as much, but now my sweet tooth is back. When I was drinking a lot, sweets had no appeal.

I likely do not have any answers but can commiserate with you. For me giving up the alcohol is not a moral choice or anything negative- I just have to do it to lose this weight. It's like giving up fast food or cutting back to taking it in moderation.

I do know that working out gives me the same sense of something that I get from drinking. Now if I could only get motivated get into exercise again...

You're clearly motivated to do something and that is the most important part of the journey.

QueenZeeIsm

Well I have been drinking for a long time... maybe more then 15 years but the last year has really taken on another level. I was the hiding bottles at the back of the cupboard type. I do not want to be that person again.

I have two beautiful kids under 10 and I am doing a online degree so I am always busy. Oh I also have a fulltime job and a husband who travels so he is hope on the weekends. I also think the loneliness in my busyness has also contributed to this habit.

I have considered professional help but I am not sure if I'm ready for that.

I was hoping that exercising will help as a distraction of my drinking time.

It is really helping knowing someone else can truly understand and relate what I am going through. Thank you for your responses. Thank you for taking the time to reply.

Tenster

I'd say do things gradually with little steps. You've stopped drinking which is great so your next step is to eat better and excersise. If it were me I'd integrate training in gradually and improve your diet weekly through little changes. Don't try and do it all at once as it might be too hard to adjust. If you can though that's great. Good luck

Moondoggie9155

as a recovering alcoholic with 22 years of sobriety if you think you have a problem with alcohol ( and only you can answer this) I am going to suggest going to an AA meeting in your area as well as seeking counseling. first things first.....trust me....you don't have to feel this way and if you address the alcohol not only will you be amazed how wonderful being sober is but your eating issues will address themselves in time.

LKArgh

QueenZeeIsm wrote: »

Well I have been drinking for a long time... maybe more then 15 years but the last year has really taken on another level. I was the hiding bottles at the back of the cupboard type. I do not want to be that person again.

I have two beautiful kids under 10 and I am doing a online degree so I am always busy. Oh I also have a fulltime job and a husband who travels so he is hope on the weekends. I also think the loneliness in my busyness has also contributed to this habit.

I have considered professional help but I am not sure if I'm ready for that.

I was hoping that exercising will help as a distraction of my drinking time.

It is really helping knowing someone else can truly understand and relate what I am going through. Thank you for your responses. Thank you for taking the time to reply.

If you have kids, then you should become ready for professional help. There is shame in not seeking help, not shame in admitting there is a problem. If you know you have an alcohol problem, everyone else knows it too already, if this is what you worry about. Talk to your husband and seek a therapist. If addictions were easy to overcome, no one would be really an addict.
You are focusing on the wrong problem. At this point, if you are 30 or 100 lbs overweight it is not what you should be stressing about. Address the addiction first, the rest will follow. You cannot solve all the problems at the same step.
Good luck.

htimpaired

QueenZeeIsm wrote: »

Well I have been drinking for a long time... maybe more then 15 years but the last year has really taken on another level. I was the hiding bottles at the back of the cupboard type. I do not want to be that person again.

I have two beautiful kids under 10 and I am doing a online degree so I am always busy. Oh I also have a fulltime job and a husband who travels so he is hope on the weekends. I also think the loneliness in my busyness has also contributed to this habit.

I have considered professional help but I am not sure if I'm ready for that.

I was hoping that exercising will help as a distraction of my drinking time.

It is really helping knowing someone else can truly understand and relate what I am going through. Thank you for your responses. Thank you for taking the time to reply.

If you don't know if you're ready for professional help, there are online resources to help you start addressing this. From Alcoholics Anonymous (if you're spiritual), to Moderation Management (if you want to learn to drink moderately-not for those who are unable to stop once they've had one drink), to secular supports like SOS and Rational Recovery-TONS of support-from online list servs to chat rooms for meetings, and reading materials on the web. Google them. They have tips on how to cope with urges, how to use nutrition to support your recovery and help your body heal, and to fill the time and live life in the present rather than under the haze of booze. Best of luck to you!

toe1226

1. Be GENTLE with yourself, it sounds like you have a lot on your plate.
2. it is really hard to lose weight and maintain that loss if you still have underlying issues with addiction, it is easy to replace addictions with exercise and you just cycle through. I'd recommend talking to someone.
3. Spend a few weeks sober, then work on eating healthier and portion size, once your body has recovered, then make a new plan. small goals.

amyk0202

My husband is an alcoholic. When he first started going to AA he did this as well. He drank a lot of very sweet sodas, ate a lot, & starting smoking again even though he quit over 20 years ago. He's been sober for a year & a half now. It's taken a lot of commitment. He went to meetings every day for months. Now, he still goes several times a week. I'm very proud of him. He stopped smoking again & he's now working on his weight.

I think you should do what you need to do to stay sober. If that means eating more for awhile, then eat. Yes, being overweight is unhealthy, but the alcohol will ruin not only your health but eventually your life and your family. Even if you're trying to hide it, your kids have noticed. There are many resources out there--go to one.

kshama2001

I think you should focus on your sobriety for now. Maybe just eat at maintenance for a few weeks.

I developed a sweet tooth when I quit drinking and in retrospect wish I'd reached for fruit instead of M&Ms.

lemurcat12

Like others have said focus on the sobriety first. Probably the eating will stabilize as you start feeling better, and better to overindulge on the food some than overwhelm yourself.

emmycantbemeeko

Willpower is not always an unlimited resource. Calling on it in one area constantly can make it much harder to exercise it in other areas- this is why it's so easy to slip from one unhealthy habit in to another.

Getting professional help and support to help you resist drinking and restructure your life in a way where you aren't constantly battling the urge to drink may free up some reserves of emotional energy/willpower for making good health choices. In trying to fight alone against your urges to drink, to eat to excess, and to be sedentary all at once, you're creating a circumstance where it's highly likely that you'll give in to at least one of those urges, if not all of them in turn.

As health promoting behaviors go, sobriety is the most important thing, and the bonus is that reaching a more stable state of sobriety will also make it much easier to achieve healthy eating and movement habits. Please consider contacting one of the resources listed above.

There's more information about willpower fatigue here: https://www.apa.org/helpcenter/willpower-limited-resource.pdf

k2mexox

"Today is only day 2 sober but I need to"


Focus on your sobriety first. Putting too much on your plate at once will just overwhelm you. Take it one step at a time. Try to make healthier choices but don't beat yourself up either. Good luck my love.

kshama2001

Rational Recovery's Addictive Voice Recognition Technique helped me to not abuse alcohol and food.

I'm reading more about Cognitive Behavioral Techniques here: The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person