perfectionism

mirunizzle18

I think I have a problem. Every time I try to start eating better and do workouts, I hit my mentality. I mean if I don't eat the "right things" like super healthy foods, I give up and I think that I will start tomorrow with the right things and so on for soooo long. I don't know what to do, is really annoying even if I know the problem. I can't help myself. Some advices?

kommodevaran

There are no super healthy foods. All foods are fine in moderation. Start today doing one small thing to improve your health. Next week, add another.

middlehaitch

Only you can tell yourself what to do.

Personally I wouldn't have succeeded without eating what I planned to eat for the rest if my life. That included chocolate, wine, cookies, cake, beer, any all my favourite yummy stuff.
I am the same with exercise. I knew I could continue doing an hour three to five times a week while I was losing weight and maintain that afterwards.

I have been maintaining for 6 years.

Take it a step at a time. Calorie counting what you eat now first, then refine your food ( if you wish) and add exercise when you are ready. This has no need to be an all or nothing endeavour. It is more likely to fail that way.

Look at it as lifestyle changes, baby steps.

Cheers, h.

dramaqueen45

You're doing all or none thinking. It's hard to change but if you recognize it you can challenge yourself when it happens and say to yourself "no, this piece of cake is okay to have every now and then, I'll fit this into my calories for the day and it will be fine." Good luck because some people are just wired to think more in that fashion and like I said, it's a hard thing to change.

German_wombat

I've tried and failed many times with this mentality. I guess for people like us, it's about changing that mindset. I've (finally) begun to count calories again but am taking the approach that I'm not going to make myself miserable or over do it when it comes to making sure everything is perfect. I was a vegan for a year a few years ago and I was doomed to fail from the start. I knew I couldn't do it forever. It was tiring work as I had to constantly make meals for myself but the weight fell off so I was happy cooking at home but exasperated the second I walked out the door. Now I am making changes for the better. Did my zucchini and brown rice have a thin layer of cheese on it for lunch today? It sure did! But I knew that most of what I was eating was good, natural food so ate it and didn't think twice. I really know what you're going through here, and I sincerely hope you make it. I use what I learnt as a vegan as a guide but a little flexibility goes a long way when it comes to weight lose. Remember, it's the war, not every battle that you are trying to win. Best of luck!

cross2bear

I hear you, sister! I was the same - if not perfect, then why bother? But that mentality kept me from accomplishing what I wanted the most, and that was to even START to lose weight!! The beauty and simplicity of the CICO approach is that it is entirely sustainable for the rest of your life - nothing is off limits, nothing is forbidden or restricted, there is nothing to feel guilty about except not DOING it!! Even if you dont change a single thing about what you eat today or tomorrow, just write it down, get a food scale and figure out the calorie count. Then you will have at least an idea of how much you are eating. Then start the MFP journey, figure out how many calories would result in weight loss for you, and I am sure you will find that you can easily follow the program. You dont have to be perfect - we are humans and there aint none of us that are perfect!! Dont burden yourself with that load - free yourself!! I sincerely wish you the best of luck - I say that if I can do it, anyone can.

rainbowbow

Seek help from a professional.

I doubt very seriously this is the only aspect of life that you act this way in and it's probably causing you all sorts of anxiety, depression, procrastination, and getting in the way of achieving things you want in life.

eldamiano

Treat yourself to a chocolate bar....

jgnatca

It's called cognitive distortion (look it up on Wikipedia) and "all or nothing thinking". It's common among dieters. By recognizing what is happening you can disrupt your habitual thoughts and choose to look at your decisions differently. My therapist taught our group to work on following a plan eighty percent of the time. It's still progress in the right direction.

brb_2013

dramaqueen45 wrote: »

You're doing all or none thinking. It's hard to change but if you recognize it you can challenge yourself when it happens and say to yourself "no, this piece of cake is okay to have every now and then, I'll fit this into my calories for the day and it will be fine." Good luck because some people are just wired to think more in that fashion and like I said, it's a hard thing to change.

I am in the same mind set and it is a constant struggle still. I lost 100lbs in the past but have gained back at least half because I lost it fast and unsustainably. This time it's taking much longer because I'm actually trying to learn about myself, figure out why I compulsively eat in the evenings when I'm not hungry, and figuring out how to make calorie counting a part of my daily life forever. You just keep on trying.

erinc5

One of my friends on here has a great quote on her profile page that seems to fit this perfectly.

"Don't let perfection get in the way of greatness."

NO ONE is perfect. But that doesn't mean you can't be great. Recognize that all you can do is be the best you can be. You will never be perfect, but that doesn't mean you should settle for failure. Work out if you can, count your calories, and move on! Stop giving up because you aren't living up to your unrealistic standards. Set realistic goals and stick to those.

beatyfamily1

Baby steps. It's a life style change. It won't happen over night.