I want to give up

Bry_Fitness70

ames105 wrote: »

Bry_Lander wrote:

It is very ignorant and condescending to think we must all approach life in conformance to your philosophy .

I have worked with hundreds of people over the years to help them lose weight through initiatives in a corporate wellness environment, and my approach has been very well received. Most of the people who need help exist in an environment surrounded by enablers who just want to make them feel better in their current state of unhealthiness, they certainly don't need more people joining that crowd.

I'm not asking you to conform to my philosophy, its not even a philosophy. I am telling you, as someone who was and still is overweight, your condescension to a person who is JUST STARTING OUT is ignorant.

I've noticed a LOT of physical trainers on this site who want to give their opinion. You may have experience with weight loss and you may understand the physicality of losing weight. It does not mean you understand the mindset of someone who was 130lbs overweight as I was. Therefore, my opinion is that you don't belong here unless you start with someone at the beginning.

The original poster had a name of 'not ready'. Does that sound like someone that needs to hear something along the lines of put up or shut up? On Day 2? That's what you did to that person. You belittled someone who is already low. Sometimes people are here to be coddled. Sometimes they just need a 'I've been there and know what you feel'. Sometimes a 'either do it or don't do it' is what that person needs.

In this case, you were way off base.

And, it is completely annoying to have a skinny healthy person tell someone who is overweight, unhappy and struggling to just go do it. Its akin to a person holding a baby telling an infertile person how great motherhood is. Tacky, rude and condescending.

You don't like my response? Great. I don't like yours. I don't think you know what its like to be overweight and discouraged. I don't think you care either...."just get up and lose that weight and shut up. I have experience and know what I'm doing" (therefore implying that others don't). That's what I hear from you. It is ignorance and 'not ready' may have already jumped ship and I lay that at the door of people like you that 'think' they know better and love to tell everyone how much you know. I hope 'not ready' will remain here, keep trying and get better advice from someone else.

-Telling someone that fitness does not lend itself to instant gratification is not belittling someone.

-Any personal trainer who doesn’t know the mental / emotional aspects of weight loss is not competent

-You notice a lot of PTs on this site giving opinions because this is a message board and people provide opinions, PTs or otherwise

-You don’t know what types of people I’ve helped over the years, or how much weight these people have had to lose. Generally, nothing positive ever comes from working off of assumptions instead of facts.

-Accepting your labeling of me as “skinny” (which in itself is insulting to some people, but I don’t care); I am not skinny because someone beat me with a skinny stick. It is not because I have some miraculous hereditary advantage or grew up in a family where people were fit or ate a nutritious diet, my mom died from heart disease and strokes, my dad has diabetes and hypertension (and a lot of other issues), and most of my family are overweight. I am skinny because I exercise frequently and make good eating choices most of the time. I look at my fitness long term, well beyond a 2 day window. OP is fully capable of being fit, but it won’t happen in 2 days; encouraging her to exist under this delusion is enabling her.

Psychgrrl

Try a weight trend program like Happy Scale (iPhone) or Trend Weight (Android). They should the overall trend in your weight regardless of the daily fluctuations--shows it on a graph. Helps put everything in perspective. Helped me get over my bad relationship with the scale.

Just hang in there--it's a marathon, not a sprint.

dynamix1

I too was frustrated, even after a week and seen minimal results and I wanted to give up, but don't. Logging into day 64 on this journey and have lost 28 lbs. Weigh yourself every 7 days like I do it on a Friday. Every Friday I weigh myself first thing in the morning. Don't do it inbetween because you will become frustrated. Stay strong.

vivmom2014

The quote functions are FUBAR in this thread.