Frustrating

tlbowles81

So I'm sure you've all seen this same post 100 times but here I am. I apologize ahead of time.

Today is my 40th day logging in. I estimated my starting weight at 250 pounds because I didn't have access to a scale at the time. My last real weigh in was at my last doctors appt in September I was at 245.

I'm 5'4", 35 years old, no kids, non smoker, light drinker (I have 3-4 1 ounce shots of gin on the weekends and I had some wine last weekend for a special occasion but worked it into my calories). I work as a paralegal so I'm on my bottom most of the day.

So almost three weeks ago I weighed myself at my moms and was down to 232. Last night I bought my own scale and weighed myself again and I'm only down to 231.

Not just going by weight - my clothes all fit the same, if anything my pants feel tighter.

My monthly cycle was over exactly one week ago so I don't have any bloating.

My diary is public, please feel free to look - I've stuck to my calorie limit like glue. I've had a piece of candy like twice in the last 40 days.

I picked up a Fitbit two weeks and started going to the gym.

I'm getting super frustrated and discouraged. One of my female friends lost 50 pounds in four months. My brother-in-law lost 150 pounds in 18 months.

Since starting this journey I'm sleeping better and my restroom habits are better and I have more energy, but I'm barely losing anything and my clothes fit worse now then they did when I started.

Please be honest with me, I'm a big girl and can take it. What can I do to increase my weight loss? Am I doing something wrong in my diary?

I haven't been eating back much of the "exercise calories" for three reasons. 1) I'm usually not hungry enough to feel the need to eat more, 2) I've read probably 100 posts and still don't understand why you would want to work out only to eat back what you've lost, and 3) I'm trying to leave a cushion for the "estimates" in MFP.

Help! I spent most of last night crying and I'm so scared I'll be one of those people who can't lose weight and all my friends who are on this journey with me will drop pounds and I'll still be me.

queenliz99

In 40 days you have 20 more or less pounds? Sounds like success to me. Keep going, you can do this!

tlbowles81

queenliz99 wrote: »

In 40 days you have 20 more or less pounds? Sounds like success to me. Keep going, you can do this!

I don't think that number is accurate though because I started on a "guess weight". The main reason I don't think that number is accurate is because my clothes don't feel different. My pants are cutting into my stomach, my skirts are still tight and my jeans barely button.

ClosetBayesian

You've lost an estimated 20 pounds in 40 days. Tell me again what the problem is?

queenliz99

Ok. So maybe you have lost 10 ponds, it is still progress. Don't compare your loss with others and weight loss does not occur overnight. Just keep going.

fvtfan

Without knowing exactly where you started it is hard to say how much you have lost, but I think you need to adjust your expectations Even if it is 14 pounds in 40 days that is amazing. If it makes you feel better I have logged for 75 days and have lost 12 pounds.

Now that you have a scale - just keep doing what you are doing for the next few weeks and see what happens. You can't compare yourself to "everyone else" it doesn't work that way.

As for eating exercise calories - if you set your goal on MFP through the wizard then your deficit for your desired weight loss is already in that number, so you should be eating back any additional burn.

jend114

Now that you are going to the gym, I recommend measuring yourself(hips, waist, thigh, arms, calf) and keeping track of progress that way too. I know it's frustrating. I'm right there with you. I've been going to the gym for a year and haven't lost any weight but have lost inches. Maybe try adjusting your calories up or down for a week and see if you see a difference in how your clothes fit.

tlbowles81

Thanks for the tips everyone ! I think I would feel better about the weight if the clothes fit better. I guess my expectations were high. I kept thinking 10-15 pounds lost would equal better fitting clothing. I really don't want to go buy a bigger pair of jeans since my goal is to lose weight, but I'm almost unable to wear the pair I have right now lol. I'm going to keep working away at it

motivatedsister

It sounds like you're losing weight, but jut not as quickly as you would like. I didn't look at your log, but if you would like to increase the rate of loss try decreasing your calories by 100 (but stay above 1200!), or move more.

I'm guilty too of looking at friends or people on MFP and saying well she lost X amount in Y days...how come I can't? Or why isn't my loss as fast as theirs? She's lost the same or less than me....how come she's gone down 2 sizes while I still haven't gone down 1! We are all different, so we lose different our weight is distributed different, etc. Who knows what that person did who lost 50 lbs in 3 months did? Was it healthy? Comparing yourself to others will make you crazy and only discourage you.

When I finally weighed myself I started at 235 and I've lost about 25 lbs to date, and it's been slow to physically see the change until now. All of sudden now it seems like overnight some of my clothes have gotten ridiculously big when a week ago they were maybe slightly loose (one wash/dry probably would have made it "fit" again lol). I'm impatient too...but all I can say is keep pushing, you are probably very close to reaching the point where things become noticeable to you. If you quit now your fear will come true and you will stay the same, the only way to make that not happen is to keep at it.

Good luck!

fastfoodietofitcutie

Whatever you do don't compare yourself to how quickly a man lost weight. Men are going to lose more weight faster no matter what you do.

ilex70

Don't quit.

10 pounds or 20 pounds, both are good progress.

Sometimes the scale moves first, sometimes the inches. I personally just dealt with pants not fitting that used to fit at the same weight. Then 3 inches disappeared from my hips within about 10 days. There is a theory that the fat cell fill up with water first when the fat is gone. Don't know if that is true, but I know that the inches and pounds don't always move in tandem.

tlbowles81

motivatedsister wrote: »

It sounds like you're losing weight, but jut not as quickly as you would like. I didn't look at your log, but if you would like to increase the rate of loss try decreasing your calories by 100 (but stay above 1200!), or move more.

I'm guilty too of looking at friends or people on MFP and saying well she lost X amount in Y days...how come I can't? Or why isn't my loss as fast as theirs? She's lost the same or less than me....how come she's gone down 2 sizes while I still haven't gone down 1! We are all different, so we lose different our weight is distributed different, etc. Who knows what that person did who lost 50 lbs in 3 months did? Was it healthy? Comparing yourself to others will make you crazy and only discourage you.

When I finally weighed myself I started at 235 and I've lost about 25 lbs to date, and it's been slow to physically see the change until now. All of sudden now it seems like overnight some of my clothes have gotten ridiculously big when a week ago they were maybe slightly loose (one wash/dry probably would have made it "fit" again lol). I'm impatient too...but all I can say is keep pushing, you are probably very close to reaching the point where things become noticeable to you. If you quit now your fear will come true and you will stay the same, the only way to make that not happen is to keep at it.

Good luck!

Thank you so much !!! It feels good to know I'm not the only one out there who looks at other people and wonders why I can't. I really appreciate the advice and you sharing your experience - it makes me feel better to know not everyone dropped two pants sizes at a snap of the fingers.

tlbowles81

Thanks everyone ! I am feeling better now. I'm going to keep going strong.

mousie1973

the only thing i noticed in your diary is that you are over in sodium almost every day.. and excess sodium can cause water retention... but just keep at it!

TRC64

You've got three different scale weights - the doctor's scale, your mother's and yours. Scales can vary widely on weights, my gym scale weighs me five pounds heavier than my home scale. Because you haven't been tracking with one scale only, you probably don't really know your starting weight or if you've actually lost weight.

Start today with your home scale, and use that to measure your progress.

Good luck!

arj5150

3 different scales means you cant accurately compare data! Glad you've decided to keep going! I'm swimming upstream myself, haven't lost any weight, but I have lost a few inches. Carrying on.

StaciMarie1974

I agree with TRC that using different scales can be confusing at best. Since you have your own scale now, use that from now on. Forget the others. Be consistent in how/when you weigh in. And track your weight on a monthly basis. For the moment commit to 2 months of:

1) logging consistently and accurately. Eat according to whatever method you prefer: its not necessary to eat at certain times, or eliminate certain foods (unless there is a medical need) so determine what makes you feel satiated, energetic.
2) have reasonable goals - you can probably manage a goal of 1.5-2 pounds a week for now. Use your own judgement if/when you feel the need to eat some of the exercise calories
3) choose your battles. What I mean by this: figure out what non-weight goals you need to work on. For me, its eating more veggies and drinking more water. We all have our 'weak' areas

The reason I said to set a timeline of 2 months: water weight from TOM/hormones has an effect on us. If you compare your weight over 30 days (weight now to 30 days from now) you negate the effects of that. Other water weight still exists, like from sodium and sore muscles and fatigue, but IMO TOM/hormones is the most predictable one. For this reason, sometimes comparing your weight from one week to the next is not the most reliable picture of your progress. If you compare stats now vs. 4/4 and 5/4 you should see a trend forming.

kettiecat

Remember everyone can physically lose weight! Keep tracking, keep adjusting, keep putting the work in.

danika2point0

Just keep at it! It sounds like you are doing the right things. Now that you have a scale, engage in more consistent weighing to note trends if that's something that might interest you (I love daily weighing but I know it's not for everyone). Take measurements and photographs. You can't go solely off of how your pants feel unfortunately because you might lose weight in other areas first. Remember every day you are doing this is one step in the right direction rather than step in some other direction. If you are truly following CICO, you will lose weight. That's just how it works (barring any medical conditions). When I got frustrated, that's how I would think. I have seen the exact same number on the scale for weeks on end before it finally moved and I know countless others have felt the same thing. Just keep reminding yourself this is the process and it will work. Good luck x

cbelc2

Keep going! You are doing great. Don't lose too fast or you'll risk your gall bladder. You Can Do This.

codygish

tlbowles81 wrote: »

Since starting this journey I'm sleeping better and my restroom habits are better and I have more energy, ....

but I'm barely losing anything and my clothes fit worse now then they did when I started.

I saw better sleeping patterns and more energy as my first results as well. At two weeks my wife told me I was not snoring as loudly or as much. At fifty days, I am only beginning to see physical changes. If you are sleeping better, your body is likely repairing and restoring itself more efficiently. If you have more energy, then try and channel that into positive behaviors. These non-scale victories are incredibly important. The changes in your physical appearance will come, it just takes time. You only lose if you quit. It sounds like your body really needed this change, and it is busy putting you in a place to win. Keep putting yourself in a positive place, and you will see the changes you want.