What should be done about this?

BlackRose278
BlackRose278 Posts: 37 Member
in Motivation and Support
I have multiple people on here under my "friends" list that clearly are suffering from eating disorders or are just starving themselves to look thinner. They ignore everything that people say when it involves helping them, and they delete any post they made if someone posts helpful advice to them. I know I can simply remove them from my list of "friends", but that won't stop them from destroying themselves. What can I do? I don't want to constantly have to report someone because of this, because I know the moderators of the site are probably very busy doing something else.

P.S. I don't know where to put this under "categories"

Replies

  • Karyn1120
    Karyn1120 Posts: 184 Member
    People have to be accountable for their own actions. Unfortunately, there may be nothing you can do - they won't change until they realize that they are actually hurting themselves, not helping.
  • sammyantics
    sammyantics Posts: 191 Member
    Report them if you're concerned. That's literally why the moderators are there. Intervening with someone struggling with a disorder or unhealthy behavior is a lot more important than deleting forum posts with cursewords.

    Beyond that, I'm not sure there is much you can do. I had a 'friend' here who was displaying unhealthy behaviors and was also only 14 or 15 who I (and other friends) tried to help. It wasn't getting through to he, so I eventually had to report her in the hopes that it would be the wake-up call she needed.

    Sadly, we can't save the world. But we can hope that taking the right approach and doing whatever is within our reach will help the people we worry for find a better path.

    Good luck. Don't ever stop caring.
  • 6502programmer
    6502programmer Posts: 515 Member
    sammyantics wrote: »
    Don't ever stop caring.

    Qft

    Reach out to those you can, report Those you can't, and don't stop caring.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
    Perhaps PM them with your concern, link them to the national eating disorder website and see how they respond. From there you can decide whether to cut them lose or continue to support them based on said response.

    Just remember, you can't save everyone. Some people don't want to be saved. And unfortunately, we can't do anything about that. Report them to the mods if you think that's the right path. Otherwise, you can't really do much.
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,198 Member
    edited March 2016
    Reach out, but don't let it affect you. If they reject your advance, delete and wish them well. You can't save everyone, and that goes double for strangers on the internet - unfortunately many of them see being told they are being unhealthy as a twisted sort of compliment - if people are noticing they must be doing it right! it's attention seeking - someone wanting to actually hide an eating disorder doesn't have a bunch of friends and an open diary on a weight loss site.

    ETA: I know that sounds harsh, but it's sadly true. Sometimes contacting them to tell them they aren't eating enough, are losing too fast etc actually spurs it on.

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