How to deal with unexpected/spontaneous events
cthakkar1985
Posts: 137 Member
Here's a hypothetical - you've planned out your entire day of macros/calories. It's about 8PM and you've got no calories left for the day and then, BOOM! Your neighbor shows up with a batch of delicious brownies that took hours to bake. She insists that you have to try one and you actually want one too because they look amazing. Of course, you can politely say, "no thanks", but it just feels like a rude move, especially given how excited she seems to be about them. Sometimes I'll eat the brownies and log them for the next day. The problem is though the next day I'll be starving since I'll have a few hundred less calories to work with. What's the best way to deal with these unexpected situations?
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Maybe just go over a bit for one day - it's really not that big of a deal provided you don't get brownies every day. Maybe work in a little bit more exercise. Maybe average your calories out over the week, so you can just take a few calories form each remaining day.0
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I say "oh thank you so much! These look delicious! I really look forward to having one for my dessert tomorrow!" Take the brownies she offers and the next day after you've eaten one be sure to tell her how much you enjoyed them.
I bake a lot and love it when people appreciate my food but am just as happy if they rave about it later.
Don't feel bad about not eating it immediately. If she tries to pressure you just tell her you're completely stuffed and wouldn't be able to enjoy it properly.0 -
You have to be convinced that your feelings are more important to you than HER feelings! She is not going to hate you if you choose to delay gratification. Take the brownie, thank her effusively, and say something like you cant wait to enjoy it as a treat when you are in a bubble bath, or relaxing in front of the tv with a movie, or some other time in the future and that you will report back to her about how great they are - you still get a brownie if thats what you want, but you get to eat it (or toss it) on your terms.0
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Agree with both of the above! "They will be great when _____" and then you can fit them in!0
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cross2bear wrote: »You have to be convinced that your feelings are more important to you than HER feelings! She is not going to hate you if you choose to delay gratification. Take the brownie, thank her effusively, and say something like you cant wait to enjoy it as a treat when you are in a bubble bath, or relaxing in front of the tv with a movie, or some other time in the future and that you will report back to her about how great they are - you still get a brownie if thats what you want, but you get to eat it (or toss it) on your terms.
We said almost the same thing at the same time! Agree that OP doesn't have to eat the brownie either. Or OP can eat a tiny sliver and toss the rest. Whatever OP wants to do with it.0 -
2 weekends ago my family from out of state surprised us with a visit. I had just eaten yummy chinese food for lunch, and had minimum calories for dinner. My father in law really wanted to eat at a restaurant that serves wings and other pub type food. I decided to just enjoy their surprise visit, and I ended up eating at maitenance.0
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It is a delicious handmade baked good, shovel it in with no regret! Seriously though it is a brownie, probably about 100 cal/ounce, 200 calories isn't going to set you back significantly.0
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honestly, as long as im under maintenance for the day, im good.
i really love brownies .....0 -
all my friends know not to bring me food. it takes a while to train them but they can be trained.0
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Sometimes I'm over, sometimes I'm under...I'd just eat the friggin' brownie, it's really not that big of a deal in the bigger picture.0
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When I lived in Colorado, I had to be very careful accepting random baked goods from friends or neighbors. Not because of the calories.0
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NO.
An unexpected/spontaneous event is when you find that one of your parents is in the hospital and you have to drive half way across the state to help out, or when you are in a car accident and get stranded, or when you have to evacuate your home due to tsunami warning. Those kinds of things WILL happen, so stay on track when you are actually able to do so.
A neighbor dropping in is not an acceptable reason/excuse.
In my case, there are health issues involved. I no longer allow other people to impose food upon me because it harms me, and that is not OK. Boundaries--they are a good thing!0 -
Maybe just go over a bit for one day - it's really not that big of a deal provided you don't get brownies every day. Maybe work in a little bit more exercise. Maybe average your calories out over the week, so you can just take a few calories form each remaining day.
This. And thank your lucky stars your neighbor is a good baker.0 -
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cwolfman13 wrote: »Sometimes I'm over, sometimes I'm under...I'd just eat the friggin' brownie, it's really not that big of a deal in the bigger picture.
^^This.0 -
azulvioleta6 wrote: »NO.
An unexpected/spontaneous event is when you find that one of your parents is in the hospital and you have to drive half way across the state to help out, or when you are in a car accident and get stranded, or when you have to evacuate your home due to tsunami warning. Those kinds of things WILL happen, so stay on track when you are actually able to do so.
A neighbor dropping in is not an acceptable reason/excuse.
In my case, there are health issues involved. I no longer allow other people to impose food upon me because it harms me, and that is not OK. Boundaries--they are a good thing!
I'm just going to go ahead and say that when my parents are in the hospital, I'm stranded in a car, or there is a tsunami, I'm probably not going to have to worry about going over my calories.
Also, don't be so judgmental.0 -
Justify, justify, justify.
Sorry, but I don't have much respect for people who make excuses when there is absolutely no need to do so in the first place.
If you want a brownie, go get a brownie and own it. Otherwise, be an adult and say NO.0 -
azulvioleta6 wrote: »NO.
An unexpected/spontaneous event is when you find that one of your parents is in the hospital and you have to drive half way across the state to help out, or when you are in a car accident and get stranded, or when you have to evacuate your home due to tsunami warning. Those kinds of things WILL happen, so stay on track when you are actually able to do so.
A neighbor dropping in is not an acceptable reason/excuse.
In my case, there are health issues involved. I no longer allow other people to impose food upon me because it harms me, and that is not OK. Boundaries--they are a good thing!
I don't believe the only time someone can be over is if they are stranded, tsunamis or car accidents. Those are emergency situations and obviously tracking calories - macros isn't going to be priority.
In the situation described above where the neighbor drops off a batch of brownies- I would think to myself " is this a treat that I really want ? Do I like the taste of brownies enough to make this an extra treat ?" If I answer yes then I eat a brownie. I would be over and log it as best as possible. I know that one brownie won't wreck all my hard work. I also know that life can't always be planned down to the calorie. Sometimes we will be over and that's okay with me.
I know learning how to handle myself in these treat situations was important. I learned moderation and portion control . moderation not deprivation. So I am prepared for these real life brownie situations. I can have the treat, be over my calories and not worry. I know in the grande scheme of things, 200 calories won't wreck my hard work.
Sometimes being too rigid all the time can backfire. Sometimes when the person never allows extras and treats, they end up not learning how to use moderation. They have avoided the treats and never learned how to work them in or accept it when they are over a little bit.
I wouldn't take brownies from a neighbor every day but once in a while isn't a huge deal.0 -
I would take that brownie, I'd love every single itty bitty crumb of it.
And then, I'd look up the calories in it, divide it by how much I need to add to my workouts to burn it away, and just walk it off. Cuz I love brownies. And walking it off is worth it.
Now, if the neighbor showed up with coconut meringues? That I'd pass on. 0 -
Two answers: I have a plan, and I stick to it.
My plan allows for spontaneous events.
That's life. That's why I DON'T do cheat days. I just have life. Life includes indulgences.
cheers!0 -
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azulvioleta6 wrote: »Justify, justify, justify.
Sorry, but I don't have much respect for people who make excuses when there is absolutely no need to do so in the first place.
If you want a brownie, go get a brownie and own it. Otherwise, be an adult and say NO.
I'm all about owning my choices, but you make it sound like the only time it's acceptable to be over one's calories is when one has an emergency - which is not true. Changing plans is not justifying, it's life. If it interferes with goals, that's on you...but I've been over plenty of times because of unexpected nights out with friends and have not only never regretted getting to bond with people and not worry AND have accomplished all my goals.0 -
As long as it's truly a rare event I say have some. Depending on your deficit, you may just have less of a deficit that day or be eating at maintenance. If it took me above maintenance, then I would be hesitating a little more.0
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If a neighbor who took the time to create something delicious thought to take their time to share it with me, it is the gracious thing to either accept it with thanks or politely decline.
It's just rude to reject it and tell them their gesture is an imposition. If you think they are doing it too often, you can always tell them that you appreciate them thinking of you, but the food isn't necessary to enjoy their company.0 -
Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »Two answers: I have a plan, and I stick to it.
My plan allows for spontaneous events.
That's life. That's why I DON'T do cheat days. I just have life. Life includes indulgences.
cheers!
This is excellent! It's like the wise Mrs Jruzer told me, "There is no wagon."0 -
azulvioleta6 wrote: »NO.
An unexpected/spontaneous event is when you find that one of your parents is in the hospital and you have to drive half way across the state to help out, or when you are in a car accident and get stranded, or when you have to evacuate your home due to tsunami warning. Those kinds of things WILL happen, so stay on track when you are actually able to do so.
A neighbor dropping in is not an acceptable reason/excuse.
In my case, there are health issues involved. I no longer allow other people to impose food upon me because it harms me, and that is not OK. Boundaries--they are a good thing!
OMG! There's nothing I love more than a brownie I had to heat up on my engine because it's the only thing I've packed in my car's emergency kit!
OP, as in most things in life, brownies happen. I would enjoy one (or half) log it, and just be accepting of it. I went out for supper tonight with a friend, I planned my meal, dessert happened. It was wonderful, and I don't feel bad (I haven't logged it yet though). The time I spent enjoying my friend's company was so worth it. I will be at this weight loss thing a while longer, I want to 1) learn how to fit unplanned food into my life (if that means a lower loss one week, I can live with that, it's a life long game I'm playing here) and 2) I don't want every decision I make about food to be about my weight loss diet. In my time here, I have learned that the time will pass. I am lighter than I was last year, and even more so than two years ago. That is success. Enjoy the brownie (or half for now), if you want it, but don't do it just because you feel obligated.0 -
nutmegoreo wrote: »azulvioleta6 wrote: »NO.
An unexpected/spontaneous event is when you find that one of your parents is in the hospital and you have to drive half way across the state to help out, or when you are in a car accident and get stranded, or when you have to evacuate your home due to tsunami warning. Those kinds of things WILL happen, so stay on track when you are actually able to do so.
A neighbor dropping in is not an acceptable reason/excuse.
In my case, there are health issues involved. I no longer allow other people to impose food upon me because it harms me, and that is not OK. Boundaries--they are a good thing!
OMG! There's nothing I love more than a brownie I had to heat up on my engine because it's the only thing I've packed in my car's emergency kit!
OP, as in most things in life, brownies happen. I would enjoy one (or half) log it, and just be accepting of it. I went out for supper tonight with a friend, I planned my meal, dessert happened. It was wonderful, and I don't feel bad (I haven't logged it yet though). The time I spent enjoying my friend's company was so worth it. I will be at this weight loss thing a while longer, I want to 1) learn how to fit unplanned food into my life (if that means a lower loss one week, I can live with that, it's a life long game I'm playing here) and 2) I don't want every decision I make about food to be about my weight loss diet. In my time here, I have learned that the time will pass. I am lighter than I was last year, and even more so than two years ago. That is success. Enjoy the brownie (or half for now), if you want it, but don't do it just because you feel obligated.
+1 for emergency brownies gently warmed on your manifold. Btw, what kind of brownies are apropos for a zombie apocalypse?0 -
cthakkar1985 wrote: »Here's a hypothetical - you've planned out your entire day of macros/calories. It's about 8PM and you've got no calories left for the day and then, BOOM! Your neighbor shows up with a batch of delicious brownies that took hours to bake. She insists that you have to try one and you actually want one too because they look amazing. Of course, you can politely say, "no thanks", but it just feels like a rude move, especially given how excited she seems to be about them. Sometimes I'll eat the brownies and log them for the next day. The problem is though the next day I'll be starving since I'll have a few hundred less calories to work with. What's the best way to deal with these unexpected situations?
I'm getting on in life ... not exactly young anymore ...
And I have to say that I have NEVER had a neighbour show up with a batch of delicious brownies at 8 pm.
I can't actually recall having a neighbour show up with brownies at any time of day.
I think I could count on one hand the number of times I've had a neighbour ever offer any sort of food.
But hypothetically, if someone did show up at the door at 8 pm with a plate of food ... I'd take it, thank them, say goodnight, close the door, and stick it in the fridge.
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Fall out with your neighbour to ensure this situation never arises.
Personally speaking I'm uncaring enough about other people's feelings to politely decline any attempts to impose food on me that I don't want. And then become less polite about it if they fail to recognise my right to decide for myself. There is very little more annoying to me than someone who thinks I should eat what they decide I should, I'll gladly never speak to them again if they pushed that on me more than once.0 -
I would just eat the brownie and blow it off. Things happen. Life happens. Brownies happen. As long as it isn't everyday it won't make any difference in the long run.
I meticulously log my food daily and use my food scale religiously, but seriously.... Things are going to happen and sometimes we just have to lighten up and enjoy something if we really want it.0
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